June 22, 2006

Why do bullies ask "What's your problem?" when
they're obviously not going to solve it?

SO, the insurance online application thingie is off and out in the Blue Nowhere, so hopefully our boy will have insurance with an effective date of July 1st. I am still burning with helpless fury at This Person who allowed this to happen, but at this point, I should stop posting about it before I cross the Line. Yes, indeed, it is a sad, sad day in the ole Blogosphere to have such snarkastically delicious fodder at your very fingertips that you Just.Cannot.Let.Free.

SO, to boot, there is other lovely stuff going on that I really shouldn’t post about in case I ever give my URL to my mother, but suffice it to say, her family is pissing me off. Specifically, her brother-in-law also known as “Uncle”....... Ah hell, who am I kidding? I’m gonna post about it. Right now, in fact. This guy has been pissing me off nearly 20 years now and is so fucking rude to us behind our Aunt’s back. It’s obvious he only “puts up with us” because he loves my Aunt and we are part of the bargain. Anyway, I will only report the most recent transgression that happened last night. In short, when no one is around that he cares about - say, my AUNT - he speaks very rudely to my nephews and is downright mean to them. He practically barks. But does he do this around my Aunt? The same Aunt who recounts joyfully at what a good “kid person” he is? Of course not. I had heard about this behaviour before, but just witnessed it myself yesterday. The first time it happened, I was shocked - yes, Older Nephew needed to be told to quit playing with the gate, but he didn’t need to be treated like a piece of shit over it. The second time it happened, I was so furious I was shaking - and again, I was shocked because I wasn’t even sure what the Uncle was yelling at Younger Nephew about and I couldn’t discern exactly which rule had been broken. I should mention that this is the same Uncle who is all lovey-dovey playing Grandfather of the Year to my Aunt’s grandson, but when she isn’t looking he is fucking barking at that kid, too (something my sister witnessed last night). Before 10/16/2005, I would have just been irritated by this behaviour as I have been irritated by him all these years anyway. But NOW, it’s personal because if he ever barked at MY kid like that? I’d probably want to choke him. But it’s tricky, because he can argue that it’s his house. So, where is the line? Who should be disciplining the kids? Do I have a right to say that if my kid is misbehaving, let ME know and I will take care of it? It’s even trickier because my sister wasn’t around for this - she wouldn’t have even known had I not told her. All of this is exacerbated by the fact that my Aunt and Uncle have a very unfriendly, antique-filled environment for kids. For example, they have a stunning, spectacular collection of Roseville pottery . My Aunt says it is her “retirement” and she sort of isn’t joking. But as Arun started crawling at lightspeed towards a set placed a mere 6 inches off the floor and my heart stopped, I had to wonder how much time we will be spending at my Aunt’s in the future. And my Uncle’s behaviour is making that decision easy.

SO, the good side of things is that Las Vegas Grandma DID arrive in town and it’s GREAT to see her. Her 3rd leg of her Kansas Tour will be at my house tomorrow night - I am going to cook a big south Indian dinner for her and we are going to RELAX because I know my Mom and my Aunt are running her around a lot. I suspect she will be tired.

SO, in all this insurance/family jamboree of gooeylicous FUN, X and I celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary yesterday. I guess the first thing I learned about marriage is that the only piece of cake you’re gonna get is at the actual wedding. After that, it’s all WORK. We’re talkin’ bone-grinding, chain-gang worthy WORK. However, I am here to report that it’s totally worth it. This year has proven that point as Crummy Thing after Crummy Thing has befallen us. It’s nice to know that when Shit is raining down, there’s someone else to help hold the umbrella when you need to take a nap. And for me, that’s what marriage is all about. Finding someone to build a life with and then going about DOING THAT, regardless of what comes your way. It makes me sad how many people speak of their own marriage’s futures in ambiguous, vague terms using words like “if” and “maybe”. It makes me mad when people talk about feeling “unfulfilled” in their marriages and finding someone else that makes them "happy". HUH? Get over yourself already. Life is hard enough, why make it harder? I may not like the fact that X is a bit slobby and he may not like the fact that I am a lot picky, but we are in this for the Long Haul, no “ifs” or “maybes”.

SO, yesterday was a hard day and I had a good cry, then went to the airport to wait anxiously delayed flight while sweating profusely with a mobile, impatient child, then dealt with a family gathering, and then confirmed that my baby son does not have liver disease, angina, arthritis and a myriad of other health conditions. Last night, after the day was done, X and I laid in bed with Arun and watched our sweet boy play with a book, babble incessantly to himself, and scramble over us to grab at whichever hapless kitty meandered too close.

Yeah, Life IS Good.

Arun had just given Only Niece a kiss - a shot I was desperate to get, but was denied. Also, notice the Roseville in the background. That is a mere fraction of the Roseville in that house and only ONE of several sets displayed precariously close to curious little monkeys. Evil Uncle is hiding the mongo, uber-expernsive Roseville planter behind his legs. Bah.

Notice the blurs of Older Nephew and Younger Nephew. I'd have a better chance of getting decent shots of little Shiloh or Suri.

Fun was had by all.


Jenn said...

My MIL collects shoes. And when I say shoes I don't mean the ones you wear, I mean little dainty ceramic shoes and little dainty ceramic purses to match them. AND they are all beautiful and expensive and all over her house. Like you said.....about 6 measly inches off the floor. My daughter as you know, right around the same age as you little mokey boy, crawling and climbing like madbabies all over the place. It's fun going there. FUN I TELL YOU! Allie is spending the entire day with her on Saturday. I'm curious to see how many shoes she has by sunday. *sigh*

Wordnerd said...

Remember that little exercise I posted at my site yesterday? Someone needs to try it, even if it's on paper and not on her blog...

Just sayin'...

As for "Uncle Roseville"? Grrr.....

Monkey McWearingChaps said...

First, sweaty adorable children, one and all.

Second, I've noticed Arun has technicolour eyes. Put him in olive/green or on some grass and the eyes...they are green-hazel! Put him against some brown and you've got limpid baby browns. *sigh* So adorable.

Third, I am happy the insurance issue got cleared up at least, even though you are still shaking with fury on the inside.

and finally, you can now add a very, small, occasionally grubby little paw to help you hold up that umbrella. That's what being a family is all about, right? :)

Rozanne said...

That uncle sounds horrible. I'd even go so far as to say that he's somewhat sociopathic, although I'm probably stepping over the line to say that.

I feel sorry for any kid that has to spend time alone with him. It's traumatic to get verbally beaten up. I totally understand your not wanting to let Arun spend much time around him.

Goofy Girl said...

"It's nice to knowthat when Shit is raining down, there's someone to hold the umbrella when you need to take a nap."

Ah! If only this quote could be added to the wedding vows. So much perspective here. And after only 3 years...Kudos!

dorothy said...

Happy anniversary! I can't believe I missed it. I can't believe it's been three years since you planned the whole wedding on your PDA and we worked together and Life Was Good. Congratulations!