Can you get cornered in a Round Room?

Part II of My Rancid Wrap-Up of BlogHer 2006
In honor of the Patron Saint of Carmel, the Venerable But Wrinkly Clint Eastwood Who Is Beginning to Look Suspiciously Like Lord Voldemort , I present a “The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly” version of my experience at BlogHer 2006.

The Good

• Have I already mentioned all the Free Shit? Yes? Good Lord, it was impressive. And heavy.
  
• The Free Booze, which led to some of The Ugly.
  
• Meeting so many very, very cool people. Particularly, getting to hang with Surrender Dorothy and Average Jane - two of my Real Life friends that I just don't get to see nearly enough these days.
  
• Coming away feeling more inspired about my blog than ever. Nah, nothing is going to change, but I have a new fondness for the Underappreciated Status Quo. I don't care if my readership ever rises substantially in numbers. Not to say that I wouldn't love to get MORE readers (who wouldn't?? Be honest!), BUT in my little obscure speck of the Blogosphere, I adore the current readers I have, I still enjoy writing posts and I have yet to attract any trolls. The important things to Blogging.
  
• Getting Incredibly Inspired watching Miss Zoot with her children. In particular, her son, who I declare to be one of the most polite tween boys I have met in a long time. In a day and age where we are bombarded with negative mainstream media reports as to how "bad" kids are getting, it was great to see that it doesn't HAVE to be that way. My mom was impressed with LilZ, too.
  
• This MommyBlogger brought her OWN Mommy, which worked out spectacularly because my Snooty Kid wouldn't have done well in daycare. Nope, not the daycare's fault, but my kid just isn't used to being left with strangers yet. Anyway, as of today, my mom is even reading my blog. gulp.
  
  

The Bad

• This MommyBlogger brought her own KID. Okay, this was by Choice and I am not really Complaining because I just couldn't leave him yet. Still, it was difficult because I just didn't get to meet as many people as I would have liked. It was very hard to network at times when I was trying to satisfy my Kid's Boob Needs.
  
• I went into this knowing that nobody reads my blog and I am okay with that. However, it became quite clear to me that I am not very “well read” MYSELF when it comes to the Power Bloggers. It was the literary equivalent of being raised on Mad and Cracked Magazines and attempting to pass yourself off at the Harvard Book Review. After awhile, I felt stupid. This is precisely why I didn't introduce myself to Dooce. No, NO, I am not dissing Dooce, she is a great and entertaining writer! However, I don't read her frequently because I just don't have the time. So, I would have felt like a Huge Phony introducing myself to a Power Blogger that I don't even read on a regular basis. What would I have said? "Uh, Hi. I don't actually READ you that much, but Jeepers! I just luv ya anyway!" Oh well. Maybe next year.
  
• Not getting to meet the Waxed Glory that is Monkey. Every time I saw a desi chick saunter by, I peered closely. Finally, an email arrived confirming what I already knew deep in my heart..... sniff.......
  
• Not getting to meet Arianna Huffington. I had a prime opportunity by the pool in the mid-afternoon before everyone realized she was even there. I was sitting RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER. However, I blew it because I got a total attack of Shyness. After her keynote speech, it was too late because she was always surrounded by someone or being interviewed.
  
  

The Ugly

• The Hotel Room. The Decor? Four pictures, mostly not lined up with anything, all non-matching in theme. The Lighting? I blame it for all the nasty photos of me lurking around. The Bathroom? NO BATHTUB. The Temperature? At times, it was cooler OUTSIDE.
  
• The Water. WTF? I drink loads of water and this conference ended up being very stressful for me in that area. First, they try to pass of this weird Contrex shit. THEN, half the time, the "regular" water pitchers would be empty. I was so tired of drinking Pepsi (bleh!) by the end of the conference, but I was SO desperate to re-hydrate my Pathetic Liver that it was worth over-working my Pathetic Pancreas with all the high fructose corn syrup.
  
• Mid-Day Outdoor Activities. I am a Sweatly Kinda Gal. I sweat BUCKETS. Too much of this conference was OUTSIDE.
  
• In the same vein of Sweat, the conference rooms were too fucking HOT.
  
• 4:45 AM Sunday Morning. Enough said about that. However, it was sorta Good because we did get an early morning, direct flight which meant I was home by about 2:00 PM on Sunday.