April 26, 2006

You’re gonna put that thermometer WHERE?

We have a little Constipation Consternation going on right now. Arun chose to express his pooping displeasure at 1:00 am, 4:00 am, and 6:00 am. The only solution for HRH was to walk him around as he slumbered. (Rancid Tangent: I wish I would have bought one of those personal pedometers before Arun was born. It would be KICK ASS to see how many miles I have walked in my OWN HOUSE. Seriously. I have established routes and pathways dependent upon the degree of tiredness and/or sickness. X, in particular, ROCKS in this area and even has a special route that includes the STAIRS. Something I am still too paranoid to attempt since I have a tendency to fall down them.) Anyway, in short, I am operating on a total of 2 brain cells here. I certainly blew out a few cells as I attempted the old “thermometor trick”. Believe you me, nothing says I! Love! You! like sticking a thermometer up your kid’s keister at 4:00am. I have spoken to the doctor, so I have a few more tricks up my sleeve. The worst is that this constipation thing follows right on the heels of Teething so both of our shut-eye tanks are running near empty. Of course, X is in Virginia while I fight the Dragons of Dung but at least this should garner me many, many Pity Points when he returns on Friday. I do feel so bad for Arun, though. He was crying so hard this morning that he couldn’t even NURSE. Any dude that turns down commitment-free boobage must really be down and out.

Damn, this week sorta sucks. Before X left yesterday, we bickered over a TOASTER. Yes, I am grateful that the worst of our problems involve crappy 20-year old toasters, but I hate it when he leaves on a note like that. Yeah, we made up before he hit the skies, but now, my kid can't poop.

Woe is me.

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