May 22, 2006

Isn’t She Beautiful?

Well, Kind Stranger in Target, she WOULD be beautiful if she was a she. But you see, she is a HE. What part of the little boy bowl haircut and the BLUE outfit did you miss?

It’s amazing how often people think Arun is a girl and it STILL makes me chuckle. As it is, I am still not used to the “cute baby” comments, but I’ve been told by other mommy friends that those go down in frequency once said baby becomes a toddler. Which is fine by me, because sometimes I get a little weirded out by going through Target and getting comment after comment. If I don’t make eye contact, often, I will just keep going as if I didn’t hear. A question for all the mothers - what do you say when people comment on YOUR baby? Saying “Thanks” seems weird - as if I am taking credit for something with which I had little to do. Other than gestate and birth, of course.

Anyway, I am starting to feel GREAT. Apparently, all I needed was some time with my GIRLFRIENDS. Saturday was a day packed full of sangria, rioja, tapas, book discussions, and gabbing. I suspected I wasn’t doing enough with my friends and Saturday confirmed it. I can see now how I have wasted my precious babysitting time by running errands. Here on out, I am going to try harder to do things for ME - like knitting, meeting with friends, hanging out in coffee shops. It’s the right time anyway - I don’t need to run errands as much without Arun anymore because he is at the age where it is fun to take him places. I’ve even put off my flower purchases until I can take him because I know he would really enjoy going to a nursery.

The downside of Staying Home is that you have to make efforts to ensure your kid gets around OTHER kids his age so that he doesn’t become some weird boozing recluse when he grows up. So, a few months ago, I had joined a Mommy Club in the hopes of meeting more Mommies that have babies near Arun’s age. I haven’t actually met up with any of the gals with babies near Arun’s age, so I finally worked it in my schedule to meet up with them at the Deanna Rose farm. I have been going to this place A LOT lately - no complaints, either. It’s only about 10 minutes from my house, it’s free ( although I always throw a few bucks in the till), and it’s a lovely place to just get out and about. So, I was glad to meet some people there. The two gals I met were very nice, but I just didn’t feel a “connection” with them. Not like I have felt with Wednesday group I meet with (the group that I sorta started with gals I met at the breastfeeding support group through our hospital). Anyway, this lack of a connection became even more clear when we started talking about Lawrence and one gal started bagging on her sister-in-law who lives there because “....she is weird. She is not just vegetarian, she’s MORE than vegetarian....”, this is where I said “Oh, she is vegan”. Then, the gal started bagging on the Mercantile (a local health food store) there because they “sell weird stuff in there....”. Then, the OTHER gal started going on and on about a store downtown where it was obvious that the owners were living an “alternative lifestyle” and her husband was just not comfortable with that. ......sigh..... For whatever reason, I really take offense when people refer to gays and lesbians as living an "alternative lifestyle". It implies some sort of CHOICE on the part of this someone living this “alternative lifestyle" and that’s probably what raises my hackles the most. Furthermore, her husband couldn’t buy some fucking SOAP just because the owners were gay?? Oh, and MY reaction to all this? Actually, pretty mild - I had just met these gals and I tend to be muted in my opinions when I first meet people since I know that I can be quite obnoxious. I wait until I get to know people better before going in for the kill. Is that a strength or a weakness? Your pick.

So, I have to make decisions - the gals were very nice and their parenting styles are not super paranoid. And I am consciously trying to surround myself with relaxed mothers. So, in that vein, they fulfill my criteria for Mommy Friends. But the close-minded comments really bothered me. I left that place seriously wondering whether I want to hang out with them. However, after consideration, I realized that this is probably good for me AND good for Arun. After all, I can’t protect him from interacting with people that have so little experience in this game called Life. After all, Anti-Vegan comments will be the least that Arun will hear from his OWN Redneck Grandpa. ...... double sigh.....


Simian Snaps

I tried the mohawk thing, but as you can see, it really didn’t work.

Recently, he determined that no, he doesn’t really want to have his hair washed, NO thank you. Like, DUDE, he pulled out the Lower Lip Quiver which SUCKS because I haven’t quite hardened my heart to it yet. As you can imagine, this presents major issues for me because The Hair MUST be washed every other day. Trust me, it DOES. At least, he is old enough that I can just stick his head underneath the faucet - much quicker for rinsing than the cup after cup after cup after cup of water method.

Fortunately, his daddy’s nappy brush put a halt to the crying.

Look closely for the bird shit in the foreground. But hey, no worries - since he's not in Daycare, he needs to get his germs from SOMEWHERE to build his little Immunity Library.

“Hey, what if I turn out to be a Gay Vegan???”

11 comments:

Monkey McWearingChaps said...

Wow, in that last one his eyes match the colour of the overalls exactly.

It's gotta be the Pantene Perfect hair that attracts so much attention. My mom says when we first moved to N. Quebec where the ethno-representation consisted of us and the Turks, people would just come up to her in the stores and touch our simian heads and ask simultaneously if it was real. What if it wasn't and they had disturbed our baby toupees? Geez. I can confirm this situation because the Turks had a baby, also born with a full rug when I was about 12 and people just couldn't get over it.

Aside from that, I'm happy you're perking up and I don't think Arun's getting dressed up as Sid Vicious for Howl-o-ween any time soon.

amanda said...

You are so much nicer than I am, I would have given up on those other moms already. My boy has the exact same crocodile overalls that Arun is wearing. I think there is significant overlap in our boys' wardrobes. :)

Cagey said...

Monkey,
Yeah, the Hair probably gets a little more attention although overall, it's just because he is a BABY. I've been out and about enough over the years with my Nephews and with my friends' babies to see that perfect strangers are crazy about BABIES. Anybody's BABY.

Amanda,
Hmmm, I can see that you just outed yourself as a Gymboree Drunkard, as well.

Wordnerd said...

Ok, that Gay Vegan pic? The one with the hat? The adorableness went to freakin' 11!

Average Jane said...

Well, at least you know you can always balance the closed-minded moms with an evening at my house watching gay themed movies and drinking martinis with The Cowboy. That is, when he's not out rodeo-ing.

Cagey said...

Jane,
One of my very favorite romantic comedies to this day is "All Over the Guy", thanks to a night of martinis with The Cowboy. In fact, I OWN the movie since I loved it so much.

Diana said...

I'm like you. I tend to make soft comments when just getting to know people then start in with the snide and biting as they get to know me. Sounds like they'd fit right in the small town I work in. Sigh.

dorothy said...

This last caption is too awesome for words.

Goofy Girl said...

Oh, that last caption is just a tiny t-shirt waiting to happen!

amanda said...

I'm not a Gymboree drunkard, but several of my boy's grandmothers are. We haven't had to buy him any clothes hardly, and he's almost 14 mos!

Rozanne said...

OMG. You've got me laughing at that last caption. That would certainly put the anti-Vegan moms' knickers in a twist.