January 9, 2008

Is admitting your hypocrisy considered hypocritical?

Remember my rants about thank-you cards? I just discovered a scribbled list with a few folks on it who have NOT received a thank you card from me - apparently, they were rudely forgotten in my post-partum haze. CRAP. That is just a few items on the Still Hanging Over My Head list that I am feverishly working on. Unfortunately, none of those items are particularly interesting enough to write about.

Anjali is 6 months old today. I will put out a post later this week with her Chair Snaps. To say that these past 6 months have flown by would be trite, albeit true. I am still sad that I feel like I did not get to savor her newborn stage as much as I was able to with Arun. A few months back, I realized that her newborn stage had come and gone which made my heart sink a bit. At that point, I decided to not waste any more of her precious baby time and as such, have really made the effort to soak up as much of her chubby little thighs, dimpled shoulders and pudgy cheeks as I can. My favorite mornings are the ones where I can just lay in bed for awhile and watch her gurgle and coo. Seeing her gummy, slobbery smiles are such a delicious way to start my day.

The other day, Goofy Girl asked me to answer the question "Look ahead two years. What's your life like?" I suspect she would be disappointed in my answer "Exactly where I am." I have no Grand Life Goals for the next few years, no Great Visions. I hope I am here in my suburban-cookie cutter house still living my suburban cookie-cutter life soaking up as much as possible with my suburban cookie-cutter children. Maybe while reading some books, fiddling with some sticks and yarn - all while blathering on about it here.

It is a good life and I am grateful for it.

10 comments:

Monkey McWearingChaps said...

Stable with surmountable problems doesn't = cookie cutter to me. It just means you have your shit together and live your life by your priorities.

Christy said...

I can't believe your baby is already six months old! Amazing.

It is sad, but I have not been savoring Izzy's newborn stage either. Honestly, I find myself wishing he was older. I just want a baby with a schedule, so that order can be restored to my life.

Cagey said...

Monkey - "cookie-cutter" is MY word, not Goofy's. I realized after posting that maybe Goofy came off as having implied that. Goofy knows me in Real Life and knows that in all probability, that I will not still be in here in 2 years. I also use "cookie-cutter" in a very tongue-in-cheek way. :-)

Christy - All I can say is do not beat yourself up. Get by the best way you know how and do whatever it takes to be the best mom you can. Sometimes, that means just getting by. I feel bad that Anjali's newborn days flew like the wind, but I do not feel guilty. I did the best I could.

Anjali said...

My answer is the exactly the same as yours.

Personally, I hated the newborn months and couldn't wait to rush through them. But you know, it's OK not to savor every stage, particularly the hard ones. It just makes you love the sweeter ones even more.

Cagey said...

Anjali Sr. - I was sad because I actually like the newborn stage. And I will never have a newborn again. Sniff. However, there are other stages that I do not like and man oh MAN, you are right about not having to savor every single stage! The 9 Month Separation Anxiety stage springs to mind. Bleh.

Jenny said...

Re: notes - From somewhere in the depths of my Emily Post Manners book last consulted when getting married, I seem to remember you have a year to write notes without being considered rude, for both wedding presents and babies.
I never thought I'd be where I am now - stressed, working mother of two monkeys and a husband who all push my buttons constantly, and a house we can't keep up with. But I also never thought I'd be here - a MOTHER. With two beautiful boys who usually say please and thank you and put the seat down, and a husband who still wants to have sex with me whether I want to or not. I have a flexible, fulfilling job, and a house with lots of creative potential for all my crafty ideas. Its all about perspective. :)

Kristen said...

I just found your blog the other day and I'm really enjoying it. My little boy Caleb will be 6 months tomorrow. So far he just gets to be more and more fun. That is when he isn't screaming his head off because he doesn't want to go to sleep.

I frequently find myself wishing away the present for the future. I have to consciously stop and remember that I will never get this time back and try to enjoy it even when it is so hard.

On the subject of thank you notes, every time I think I am caught up another gift arrives. I am grateful but good grief I just want to be done with them.

Mojavi said...

yes it is a good life is it not?? I have to admit you and chocolate covered susan make some of the days fly by...

Diana said...

Oh, good lord. It has been 6 months, hasn't it?

I was saddened to find that what you are seeing was true for me, too. The babyhood of Sara went much faster than that of Colin's. I think it's because with two, you just aren't going to focus on the baby, but on both together. You get much more but do lose the focused all-encompassing 'wrap the world around this one child' part.

Mamma Sarah said...

Wow 6 months! They did fly by! But you know what they say... "time flys when you're having fun!"