February 8, 2006

Is less actually more? Or is it still just less?

First, Let me be clear regarding Monday’s post.

#1: I really don't feel that bad about "not working". I am more weirded out by the very fact that I don’t feel bad - it’s not like I don't think I am pulling my weight. Case in point: our hot water heater went to the Big Hot Springs in the sky on Sunday night. Since I didn't have to report to the Man on Monday morning, I had ample time to call a plumber, diagnose the problem and comparison shop for water heaters at Lowe’s. I saved us nearly $200 because I had the time to make sure we made the right decision. If I had been working for the Man, I would have just believed the con artist of a plumber I originally called.

#2: I am not slim or even slimmed down. I still have some weight to lose from Smoking Cessation 2000. Oddly enough, the Pregnancy Weight and the Smoking Cessation weight don't bother me because they were for very worthy causes, but the Christmas 2004 weight DID - that's why I was so ecstatic and posted about it. Unfortunately, I haven't been slim since grad school where I proved that you can maintain a svelt figure with Capri Lights, Taco Bell and Budlight - 3 food groups I don't care to ever see again. Bleh.

Moving on.............

So, I head out to DC/VA tomorrow. Luckily, Cousin J will be adding “house” and “cats” to her sitting duties at a greatly reduced price from our previous pet sitter. Score. Anyway, I am very excited about getting on a plane again - I haven’t been anywhere since last July. Usually when I travel, I pack as lightly as possible in confirmation of my packing mantra “Less is Less”. It used to be that the only things I would be in dire straights without were my laptop, workpapers, contacts, medicine, wallet - most everything else really can be purchased in a pinch if needed. However, having a kid tends to rock your packing world. sigh...... For the flying monkey’s inaugural trip, I am still going to try to bring as little as possible and test my mantra. My goal is to bring only the usual carry-on suitcase, diaper backpack, carseat, baby Bjorn and Combi travel stroller. Pray for me. At least at this point the weight differential between the laptop and the kid is minimal.

Thursday night is a work related dinner thingie with X's company, which will be fun because I like hanging out with those folks. It certainly helps that two of my very good friends work for his company - Goofy Girl and Dorothy. Then, I am free all day Friday. I decided to nix the Monticello outing and will just do Mt. Vernon and Crate & Barrel. Yes, you read that correctly. I frequently incorporate C&B outings into my vacation plans and have been known to Mapquest directions to the nearest C&B, if needed. We are in the process of getting one in Kansas City (Lord, grant me credit card strength) but in the meantime, I have to get my fix whenever and wherever I can. If that means driving to Kittery, Maine from Boston for the holy grail that is the C&B OUTLET, then so be it...... Anyway, Friday night will be spent with some friends so they can meet Arun as they are going to be sit with him for us on Saturday evening. We are going to a posh hoedown in Great Falls to hobnob with the rich (not sure about the famous). The attire is “date dress” - whatever the fuck that means because I can’t remember the last time X and I went on a date. All I know is that it threw me into enough of a panic that I finally dragged my fat ass to Eddie Bauer to get proper slacks so that I don’t look as if I just arrived in from KANSAS or something. I am looking forward to the extravagent gig, but it did complicate my packing mantra because now I have to include my breast pump and a bottle amongst all the other crap the kid needs (I am still sad that the pocket in my suitcase that used to hold knitting supplies and celebrity ragazines makes the perfect diaper compartment).

Oh, I am also meeting up with Amalah on Saturday. We are going to meet for lunch and will compare our babies to see whose kid is Smarter! Cuter! and Better Smelling! Then we'll line them up for a race, which my kid will LOSE because all he can do is roll over for some nipple action. No crawling in sight yet for that boy unless I lay across the living room him and whip the maternal goods out for him. Anyway.... I am navigating scary DC traffic for this gladiatorial meeting of the babies so damned straight, my kid better win. I have never arranged to specifically meet another blogger before - I told Amy that if we end up staring slackjawed at each other, we can at least talk about the kids, I guess - they make a great equalizer, of sorts. Unfortunately, she will discover that I have been ignoring her advice on shampoo - I’m just an Aveda/Matrix gal. Sorry. I also haven’t pulled out my foundation brush since that Estee Lauder counter chick conned me into buying it 3 years ago. I hope I still can pass muster, though. Eek. The pressure.

Rancid Pondering: What is the age limit for the 2 person minimum in HOV lanes? Do babies count? My flight comes into DC smack dab in the middle of rush hour traffic - can I drive on the special HOV highway with the kid? That is the most direct route for where I am going. I wonder if I could play the Hick From Out of Town card if I get pulled over and say that I wasn't intelligently designed enough to figured out their fancy highway system? You see, in KANSAS, we are equal opportunity drivers. It's not uncommon to see a single driver barreling around in his two ton extended cab pickup - from his cookie cutter suburban house to his corporate gig. No joke!


The Littlest Blockhead

They say a picture is worth a thousand words - in this case, it's worth 1600 super junior double bacon McRibb cheeseburgers (or something like that). My ex-co worker from Block gave this to me. G sacrificed precious, precious BlockBucks to ensure the new Baby on the Block had appropriate taxation attire. Thanks, G! Now, I am kinda, sorta sorry I switched to TurboTax.

What a “Wonder”ful World

I love this picture because just about every kid out there in the blogosphere now has a picture with him/her in an Ocean Wonders contraption while playing with the ugly-smugly Lamaze cube thingie. And of course, I just want my kid to BELONG so I threw out all the Graco CRAP I had originally bought and totally went Fisher Price because you know, personalities are so YESTERDAY.

Just a Chip off the Ole Rock Chalk

The indoctrination starts early. We just won’t make him pay dues for awhile. I keep offering to buy some of X’s alma mater attire, but he declines. Sucker. I can’t wait to see his face when Arun sniffs his nose at Hanover, NH and trots off to Lawrence, KS with crimson and blue twinkling in his eyes..... That’ll teach X and his Ivy League ass.

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