Fearless

Pink Floyd, Meddle 1971

Arun: Which bad guys do you like, Mama?  I like Bowser and the Tiki Tong!
Me:  I like Tony Soprano, although to be fair, I would include Michael Corleone.
Arun: What?
Me: Also, I can't forget Stringer Bell - totally serious BAD GUY.  And Walter White is not only bad, he is breaking bad.
Arun: I don't understand you, Mama.

Neither does anyone else, kid.

*****************

Anjali: Mama, I love you when I am happy, not when I am mad.

Those words were said for a reason, she knew what what she was saying.  Normally, we have a saying "I love you even when I am mad."  I started this to help her differentiate between when I am angry with her versus my love for her.  Her point was crystal clear:  She doesn't always love me.

And, so it begins.

Ah, this girl has her Defiant Scowl perfected, worthy of a teenager.  There was a time when she would cry as she got in trouble, because she actually cared if I was mad or not.  Now?  She can give as good as she gets.  Actually, she gives better.  Gentle Readers, it's not her fault she hit her brother.

It's not her fault she threw a perfectly good apple in the trash because you dared to give her AN APPLE.

It's not her fault she ripped her barrette out of her hair because you insisted she quit looking like a street urchin all of the goddamned time.

It's not her fault she colored the WHITE dog with GREEN bubbles.

The injustice!  Nicely punctuated with tears, crossed arms and a lovely eye roll.

Dude.  She's ready to steal my car keys and sneak out her bedroom window (Note: Not that I ever sneaked out my sister's bedroom window then discovered I couldn't get back in, then promptly went to sleep in the back yard only to be woken up by the flashlight of a police officer in my face.  Nope. That never happened.)

Oh and the dog washed out fine, so it seems that Anjali might be attending her Junior Prom, after all.  Perhaps.

I suspect my parents are both snickering as they mumble vague quotes about "paybacks" and "hell".

Lately, the allure of sugar and artifial color has been too great for her.  During the spate of Valentine's Parties and the ensuing Goody Bag Fest, it was discovered that Arun's classmates went overboard with the candy whereas, Anjali's classmates did not.  Such an inequity in confectionery distribution was simply not to be born.

Around these here parts, she been referred to as The Bonbon Bandit....The Lollipop Larcenist....The Sweetmeat Sweetheart.

We know her simply as "Anjali".

Exhibit A

The unsuspecting victim of a heartless, Valentine's Day Massacre.  Oh, the sweet irony! 

Exhibit B

My suspicisons were first aroused when I came across empty packages of candy carefully snipped open and piled in a corner of our dining room, behind the table.  This was discovered early in the resulting crime spree.  The pile grew significantly later on.

Exhibit C

My parents both "claim" that 37 years ago they found a similar crime scene awash in sugar.  My parents can spin tales worthy of Shakespeare.  LIARS, I tell you.

Exhibit D

The candied culprit expressed no remorse.

Exhibit E

Instead, she was a veritable display of giddy abandon.  

The detox from that sugar high is gonna be rough, folks.

Maybe she can cure herself with her mind, too.