May 21, 2012

Sensitivity Training, We Needz It

Scenes From a Car, Somewhere Deep in the Heart of the Soul-Sucking Suburbs Of Olathe KS

Manoj: So did you hear the news that more minority babies were born than majority babies last year?  Your clan is losing power.

Me: Whatever. Besides, you're in the same boat -- your clan is getting diluted.

Manoj:  What?

Me: Yeah, you're Real Brown, but all these Fake Browns popping up all over the place are going to take over.

(I gesture pointedly toward our own little mixed pickle in the backseat. She is sometimes known as "Anjali".)

Manoj: Seriously, you're losing your White power.

Me: Yeah, and you pledged your troth to a White girl.  Be careful of what you say.

(At this point, I realize that apparently, I've been reading WAY too many romance novels.  Fortunately, Manoj doesn't notice my dorky use of language. Which is why I had to marry him, of course. )

Manoj (laughing): Yeah, that's true.

(Manoj pulls into the parking lot of the Mexican panaderĂ­a.  We are going to a Mexican couple's house for dinner and in Manoj's mind, we should take Mexican pastries to a Mexican couple's house.  Keeping in mind, the Mexican couple is serving NON-Mexican pasta and pizza for dinner.  IT ALL MAKES PERFECT SENSE, AMIRIGHT?)

Manoj (speaking to Anjali's friend in the backseat): Stella, do you want to go to a cool place that sells cheesecake? It's a Hispanic place.  Do you know what "Hispanic" means?

Stella (Hesitantly):

Manoj: It's Brown People.

Stella: Um.... okay??

Anjali: My daddy is from INDIA but he likes Kung Fu Pao chicken which is from CHINA.  It's CHINESE food.


Manoj parks the car and then takes the girls into the panaderĂ­a for some pay de queso and other pastries.  I opt to stay in the car and immediately pull out my Moleskine and my pen so I can frantically scribble what just happened because holy cow, that was one conversation that needed to be recorded for posterity, future therapy or, in a pinch, lawsuits.

1 comment:

Moderndayhermit said...

That's so funny I copied and pasted it for ease of access, lol.