October 4, 2005

Exactly how red is my neck?

Just when I think I have successfully gotten used to this whole Suburbia Thing, the squirrels come a callin’ and thus, CALL ME OUT.

The Critter Control guy came yesterday to take care of the Squirrel Saga going on in our attic. For whatever reason, I couldn’t help myself, I followed the guy all over the place, asking questions, making observations. In retrospect, I wonder what the guy thought of the crazy pregnant chick who could barely contain her excitement. He immediately trapped one of them and I TOOK A PICTURE. I was laughing so hard and practically dancing in the front yard --- I couldn’t help it! Here we live in this prissy suburb and we have a dead squirrel dangling from our rooftop. LOVE IT. X, on the other hand, was horrified although this was abated a bit when the Critter Guy reported all the damage the squirrels had inflicted that must be repaired. At this point, we are definitely looking at handing over AT LEAST $600 to various folks (HVAC, electrical, Critter Guy) when it is all said and done.

My only regret is that the squirrel wasn’t dangling in full view of our bitchy drunk neighbor - the one who doesn’t like our cat. DAMN......

Squirrel Saga Update: So, the Critter Guy came by early this morning to collect Squirrel #2 dangling from our roof by his flea-infested neck (the squirrel, not the Critter Guy). I just noticed that Squirrel #3 has met his grisly end. This leaves just one more to go. At $60 a pop. Sigh.

All I can say is Die, Squirrel, Die. Fuck PETA. The bastards are a fire hazard and I am unapologetic.

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