September 8, 2010

I think I have this "review blog" thing down wrong.
Or, the one where I endorse things for free.

FTC Disclosure: I paid for these things, Gentle Reader.  Oh yes, I paid for these on the Internet, then waited anxiously by my mailbox (in rain and snow!), then dragged them into the house like the grunting cavegirl I am, then mixed them up with things we already owned so that my husband would never suspect that our dwindling bank account is due to my secret shopping addiction.  He thinks they showed up for free.  But I will show him, Gentle Reader.  Now won't I?


Last year, I purchased a really nice coffee pot. Specifically, the Cuisinart DCC-1200 12-Cup Brew Central Coffeemaker. I love this coffee pot, I want to marry it, but since that is illegal (legislation pending!), we must live in sin, making sweet, caffeinated love on my kitchen counter (only morning sex, folks - otherwise I cannot sleep at night.)  The thing about this coffee pot is that I see it everywhere on TV - on the set of Two and Half Men, various sitcoms, home design shows and just yesterday while I was at the gym, I spied it on the set of Days of Our Lives.  So, in short, those bastards at Cuisinart have given this really nice coffee pot to everyone else except me.


For the past few months, we have really enjoyed BBC Planet Earth and when I saw the Life set, I snuck that into the house.  Specifically,  I ordered the one narrated by David Attenborough because while Oprah may be the Girlfriend of All of Us, I did not care to hear her narrate the rutting of sea dragons.  Yes, yes.  There is much animal sex in this thing.  Beware or your own Precious Snowflake will be exposed to the horror that is "reproduction" and I am not talking storks.  So yes, we have gotten Manoj's our money's worth out of this.  I smile fondly as my children re-enact their favorite scenes - flopping like mudflippers, jumping around like sail fish and their favorite - the fight between the fringe-head fish and an octopus (they always argue over the parts played because they both want to be the fringe-head fish.  Ah, those little rascals.)  But the best part of this series is the dramatic musical score.  Even for the episode regarding plants.  Yes, Gentle Reader, grab your box of tissues and watch the brave little water lily push, push, push its way out of the water all set to a a swelling soundtrack that will totally screw up your pacemaker.  And brace yourself!  Will the wee orphaned stalk of wheat survive in harsh conditions after its parents were ruthlessly mowed down by a roving gang of livestock?  The drama, folks.  It needed a soundtrack.


Last week, the lovely anathematized pariah known as "Anna Viehle" linked to the A+R Dinobox and commanded that Ye Shall Go Forth and Consume.  So, I blindly meandered over to the A+R site and bought the damned thing.  Hey, what can I say?  I am zombie sheep, hear me bleat and moan.  Yes, this doodad is a little pricey, but I can report that we have already gotten hours of entertainment from it.  And in this house, Entertainment for Kids = House Hunters International for Mama.  Sold!  Besides, I love watching my kids channel their inner Charles Darwin while they let loose creating new species.  I also bought the Robobox for extra speculative evolutionary fun.  And I would be a lying liar who lies while lying if I did not confess that I perhaps, maybe, might have had been having a little fun with it myself.  No jury would convict me.

5 comments:

stephanie said...

Hey, that's our coffeemaker! Only, it is still sitting in the box, unused. I mostly just use my french press for a cup or two, but the coffeemaker is there for when we have houseguests and need a true pot of coffee.

caro said...

We have a stencil kit like that dino box, only with face parts instead of dinos. It's adorable. (We didn't pay for it ... it was a gift from a friend.)

Mrs. CPA said...

Hudson loved the part on life when the little frog is climbing up the rocks and that spider comes up over the top and BOOM! it turns into a disk and flings intself down the mountain. Hudson made up all kinds of dialog and we watched that part probably 100 times.

Bethany said...

I can't get enough of House Hunters International lately! I like the Life series too but am hooked on foreign beaches and historic locales.

D. said...

Ooohh! Thanks for the coffeemaker tip. Ours died (and it was the El Cheapo Mr. Coffee from our poor grad student days) and it hasn't been replaced. Off to order a new coffee maker!