December 8, 2009
Have a Heart, Tinman.
So, I received my shipment of Christmas cards, only to discover that I must have found a helluva lot new friends in 2009 because the normal lot of 50 cards was not enough. Another box of cards has been dutifully ordered. You see, I like doing Christmas cards. I love the process of picking the perfect photo (and before photo cards, the perfect card itself), the signing of them (I always hand sign my cards), the addressing of them (I do that by hand, also), sticking return labels and stamps on them, then trucking them off to the post office. Call me crazy, but I enjoy it.
Now that you have read that, you will realize the seriousness of this: A week ago, I discovered a significant cache of 2008 Christmas cards that had been signed and addressed, but not mailed. I knew there were some cards that I had just let go, but I did not realize how many. It is discoveries like that make me realize how very sad I was last year. Sigh.
The upside of all that is it simply makes me happier than ever to realize that I really am on the Other Side now. Truly. Life is frocking good.
Yes, things are just so lovely right now and it only makes it more poignant when having to deal with so many jerks lately. Holiday spirit, folks? Heard of it? I can report that many folks are not getting it. I am out and about a lot these days doing things for our business. And all of the Scroogy McGrinch O'Potters are breaking my heart, y'all. Within a few days period, I was verbally accosted twice at our post office. Twice!
The 1st incident occurred after some Guy #1 pulled an illegal u-turn in the street and nearly hit me. I was so flustered, I committed a minor traffic transgression. I was in a right-turn lane, but went straight instead - I did not realize it because the right-turn lane is directly in line WITH GOING STRAIGHT. Guy #1 begins furiously honking his horn, follows me into the post office and begins berating me. At one point, I gave him the Talk to the Hand motion and threatened to call the police if he did not back off.
The 2nd incident occurred two days later and this one still has me clueless. Scene? Again, the post office. I mail a letter and pull forward to enter the exit lane. In the corner of my eye, I see a guy racing through the parking lot, he beats me to a spot in front of me, then opens his door and starts screaming "You fucking bitch!!!!". And my kids are in the car. It was AWESOME. I have no earthly idea what set off Guy #2 but rest assured, I threatened to call the police on him, too.
Those are two specific incidents which I can recount - the other days are littered with all sorts of randomness..... Eye Rollers who are impatient with my sheer audacity to be in line before them or even better, the Line Cutters who trip over their happy selves to shiv you in the retail heel or, last but not least, Lovely Drivers are perpetually in a mental mode of Dammit, Get Out of My Way So I Can Beat You To This Traffic Light. The mind boggles. Or perhaps, I am just too damned happy this holiday season and that is pissing people off.
Okay, folks, your traditional holiday PSA about slowing down and smelling the mistletoe is complete.
As you were....