Dear Mom,
This post is not about you. Well, THIS part of the post is about you, but really, this post is not about you.
Your favorite daughter (only because J doesn't read this!),
Cagey
P.S. You better visit me in the hospital!
___________________________
Dear Anjali,
Oh baby girl, we are so very excited to meet you. In fact, we've consulted our calendars and it appears that this Saturday would really work out best for us. If you could arrange your schedule accordingly, it would be most appreciated.
Thanks!
Mama
_____________________________
Dear Arun,
Remember all those kicks and head butts you've been delivering to your baby sister all these months? The gig is up and I have to warn you that revenge is a dish best served cold. A revolution is coming, my little friend.
Good luck!
Mama
_____________________________
Dear Vanessa, Pearson and Harry,
After all your patience with the addition of one kid, I regret to inform you that another one will be arriving shortly. I hope you find it in your fuzzy little hearts to forgive us someday.
Sincerely,
Mama
_____________________________
Dear Blue,
Has it ever occurred to you that perhaps Steve might be a little slow?
Sincerely,
Reluctant Fan
_____________________________
Dear Drunken Northside Neighbor,
What sort of Heartless Whore doesn't return a little boy's ball when it happens to bounce over the fence into her yard? Oh right, that Heartless Whore would be you.
Yours truly,
The Southside Neighbor Who Hates You
_____________________________
Dear Producers of Big Love,
Since you've already brought on board half the cast of Veronica Mars, why don't you just go ahead and bring on the lovely Miss Mars herself? I bet she can figure out why the hell ALL the women in Juniper Creek are wearing that ONE freaky assed hairstyle.
Sincerely,
Faithful Fan
______________________________
Dear Pregnancy Hormones,
Make a choice. Oily face OR itchy elbows. BOTH are not options. While you're at it, tell that renegade cousin of your Post-Natal Hormones to not bother showing up, his services won't be needed.
Faithfully yours,
Cranky Pregnant Bitch
______________________________
Dear Cashier at Kinko's,
When you asked what sort of baby I was having and I replied "A girl" and you said "Oh, I bet you are grateful" as you clucked towards my SON, I bet you didn't realize how much I wanted to smack you. Get a fucking clue.
Pissed off,
Cranky Pregnant Bitch
_______________________________
My Dearest X,
Your son puts his shoes back in the shoe basket, throws his trash away, grabs a napkin when he spills his water, closes cabinet doors, and in general, likes things to be in place. He's only 20 months old.
Hint, hint....
The Love of Your Life
June 27, 2007
Where are the Popular Kids?
I've noticed a disturbing trend in the Blogosphere. Apparently, we have no Prom Queens or Homecoming Queens in our midst. Time after time, when referring to their high school years, you will see bloggers ruefully declare "I was such a nobody!" or the classic "I was such a geek!". I've never, ever seen a blogger admit they were a Popular Kid. Have you?
I was thinking about this last week because a friend of mine my high school was in town, but we didn't get to meet. She's my one, last "current" friend from high school, but truthfully, we weren't even friends in school - we became friends afterwards, when we went to college.
I've talked often about how much I dislike the town of Tonganoxie. To be fair, the town didn't like me very much, either. I moved there mid-year during 6th grade, just after my parents' divorce. It was not a good time in my life anyway, plus I was coming on that tender of age of 12. I suspect I had an attitude when I arrived. I never, ever felt that I fit in while I lived there. Ever. I was always on the edge, looking in. However, while I may not have been a Somebody, I wasn't a Nobody, either. I was very active and the Popular Kids couldn't exactly pretend I didn't exist - I was in volleyball, cross country, track, Science Club, Knowledge Bowl, stage band, marching band, regular band, etc. etc. I even did one year as a cheerleader, although I certainly wasn't the cheerleader "type". And let me be clear -- I didn't really excel at any of these activities (a trend that seems to be the story of my life and contributed to the tagline of this blog). I merely enjoyed doing the activities, but was far more likely to come in 2nd or 3rd place- rarely 1st (I have a stack of silver and bronze track medals to prove it.) And really, I was okay with that - I've never been a superstar. Whatever.
So, I was much relieved to get the hell outta high school. It was stifling for me. Shortly after graduation, I moved to my dad and step-mom's in Lawrence, then got an apartment when I started KU that fall. I never looked back and never felt an iota of homesickness. In fact, when my sister graduated from Tonganoxie 5 years later, I celebrated the fact that I would never have to go back there. She later moved back and I'll admit that I was petty enough to be resentful of it. It's only been since Arun was born that I am comfortable going there now - I want him to know his cousins and as a testament to what a Mother's Love will do for a person, I make the trek out to Leavenworth County far more frequently than I ever thought I'd be doing.
Where was I? Ah, "not belonging". Bloggers often joke that the Blogosphere is like high school. Sometimes, it is. But usually, it's more like college to me. When I went to college I felt so free of the social anxieties that had plagued me during high school. In college, I easily found a group that I liked to hang with and never looked back. I loved college and while I still wasn't cool, it didn't matter by then. I had a group in which I belonged. And, so it is with blogging. I will never be a Power Blogger, I will never be a Popular Kid, I will never have throngs of readers hanging on to my every post. At one point, I think I did harbor grand visions of having hordes of readers (don't we all in the beginning?) but I discovered along the way that's not what I actually need from blogging. I just need to belong somewhere. That's all.
Anyway, back to the title - where are the Popular Kids in the blogosphere? Do Prom Queens not have Internet access or something? Come on - admit it if you were a Popular Kid.
We'll still hang out with you.
This picture was taken at Olathe Grandma's house. I think I wore this outfit only ONCE to school - I felt too self-conscious to wear it otherwise. With good reason. Don't even get me started on the big-honkin' glasses. Good grief.
I was thinking about this last week because a friend of mine my high school was in town, but we didn't get to meet. She's my one, last "current" friend from high school, but truthfully, we weren't even friends in school - we became friends afterwards, when we went to college.
I've talked often about how much I dislike the town of Tonganoxie. To be fair, the town didn't like me very much, either. I moved there mid-year during 6th grade, just after my parents' divorce. It was not a good time in my life anyway, plus I was coming on that tender of age of 12. I suspect I had an attitude when I arrived. I never, ever felt that I fit in while I lived there. Ever. I was always on the edge, looking in. However, while I may not have been a Somebody, I wasn't a Nobody, either. I was very active and the Popular Kids couldn't exactly pretend I didn't exist - I was in volleyball, cross country, track, Science Club, Knowledge Bowl, stage band, marching band, regular band, etc. etc. I even did one year as a cheerleader, although I certainly wasn't the cheerleader "type". And let me be clear -- I didn't really excel at any of these activities (a trend that seems to be the story of my life and contributed to the tagline of this blog). I merely enjoyed doing the activities, but was far more likely to come in 2nd or 3rd place- rarely 1st (I have a stack of silver and bronze track medals to prove it.) And really, I was okay with that - I've never been a superstar. Whatever.
So, I was much relieved to get the hell outta high school. It was stifling for me. Shortly after graduation, I moved to my dad and step-mom's in Lawrence, then got an apartment when I started KU that fall. I never looked back and never felt an iota of homesickness. In fact, when my sister graduated from Tonganoxie 5 years later, I celebrated the fact that I would never have to go back there. She later moved back and I'll admit that I was petty enough to be resentful of it. It's only been since Arun was born that I am comfortable going there now - I want him to know his cousins and as a testament to what a Mother's Love will do for a person, I make the trek out to Leavenworth County far more frequently than I ever thought I'd be doing.
Where was I? Ah, "not belonging". Bloggers often joke that the Blogosphere is like high school. Sometimes, it is. But usually, it's more like college to me. When I went to college I felt so free of the social anxieties that had plagued me during high school. In college, I easily found a group that I liked to hang with and never looked back. I loved college and while I still wasn't cool, it didn't matter by then. I had a group in which I belonged. And, so it is with blogging. I will never be a Power Blogger, I will never be a Popular Kid, I will never have throngs of readers hanging on to my every post. At one point, I think I did harbor grand visions of having hordes of readers (don't we all in the beginning?) but I discovered along the way that's not what I actually need from blogging. I just need to belong somewhere. That's all.
Anyway, back to the title - where are the Popular Kids in the blogosphere? Do Prom Queens not have Internet access or something? Come on - admit it if you were a Popular Kid.
We'll still hang out with you.
I wasn't kidding.
June 25, 2007
If there's an exception to every rule, is there
an exception to that rule as well?
Breaking News!
NO, I am not having that baby yet. It's even better!! A new James Lileks book, Gastroanomalies: Questionable Culinary Creations from the Golden Age of American Cookery, will be coming out this fall. I am SO exited by this new development. The only really sucky thing is that it doesn't come out until NOVEMBER and to pre-order now is just taunting me. I was extremely grateful that he released Mommy Knows Worst shortly after my 1st child was born (i.e. JUST when I needed such a book), but Lileks just burnt all his goodwill with this one. Because I'm sure he had a say in the publish date, right?
TRUST SNAPE
It's official - The Cerebral Venus Online Book Club will be discussing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows on Monday, August 6th. The post itself will be spoiler-free, but the comments will be ROTTEN. Yee haw!
Visitors
So, Goofy Girl and I have been discussing the whole "visiting a new mother in the hospital" thing. We were both of the opinion that a new mother would rather be left alone in the hospital. My sister, on the other hand, actually wanted visitors. The question is - why aren't people asking the new mother if she wants visitors? There seems to be some sort of decorum where folks think they must visit and the mother thinks she can't say no. I wonder if it extends from the "olden" days when a mother was in the hospital for an extended period of time - visitors would have made more sense. However, with Arun, he was born on a Sunday evening and we were home by late Tuesday afternoon. This left Monday as pretty much the only day for visiting. Don't get me wrong - I've been incredibly touched by all the folks promising to visit me in the hospital with Anjali, but honestly? I would be completely exhausted if everyone who said they were going to come by actually came by. The scary thing is that all these years, I've assumed new mothers didn't want visitors - I tended to wait until the mother got home. Now, I am left wondering how many friends I have offended over the years by not visiting them in the hospital. Yikes! Am I over-thinking this??
Snappity Snap, Snap.
Gemstone Eyes
NO, I am not having that baby yet. It's even better!! A new James Lileks book, Gastroanomalies: Questionable Culinary Creations from the Golden Age of American Cookery, will be coming out this fall. I am SO exited by this new development. The only really sucky thing is that it doesn't come out until NOVEMBER and to pre-order now is just taunting me. I was extremely grateful that he released Mommy Knows Worst shortly after my 1st child was born (i.e. JUST when I needed such a book), but Lileks just burnt all his goodwill with this one. Because I'm sure he had a say in the publish date, right?
TRUST SNAPE
It's official - The Cerebral Venus Online Book Club will be discussing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows on Monday, August 6th. The post itself will be spoiler-free, but the comments will be ROTTEN. Yee haw!
Visitors
So, Goofy Girl and I have been discussing the whole "visiting a new mother in the hospital" thing. We were both of the opinion that a new mother would rather be left alone in the hospital. My sister, on the other hand, actually wanted visitors. The question is - why aren't people asking the new mother if she wants visitors? There seems to be some sort of decorum where folks think they must visit and the mother thinks she can't say no. I wonder if it extends from the "olden" days when a mother was in the hospital for an extended period of time - visitors would have made more sense. However, with Arun, he was born on a Sunday evening and we were home by late Tuesday afternoon. This left Monday as pretty much the only day for visiting. Don't get me wrong - I've been incredibly touched by all the folks promising to visit me in the hospital with Anjali, but honestly? I would be completely exhausted if everyone who said they were going to come by actually came by. The scary thing is that all these years, I've assumed new mothers didn't want visitors - I tended to wait until the mother got home. Now, I am left wondering how many friends I have offended over the years by not visiting them in the hospital. Yikes! Am I over-thinking this??
Snappity Snap, Snap.
Arun Bob
Official Redneck Nickname, courtesy of my dad.
Official Baby Belly, courtesy of YoYo Baby Yogurt.
Official Farmer's Tan, courtesy of X.
Official Baby Belly, courtesy of YoYo Baby Yogurt.
Official Farmer's Tan, courtesy of X.
Gemstone Eyes
GJune 24, 2007
Is this some bizarre form of nesting?
I just fertilized, watered, and weeded all the landscaping in my backyard.
But only after I had completely trimmed my rose and hydrangea bushes, of course. Otherwise, that would just be CRAZY.
But only after I had completely trimmed my rose and hydrangea bushes, of course. Otherwise, that would just be CRAZY.
June 22, 2007
Care to dip a toe in my baby pool?
Baby Pool
I know, I know........I keep mentioning this whole “I’m having a baby thing” like a tiresome broken record - I'm obsessed. I am due to give birth in less than 2 weeks and by 7/13, at the very latest, I should have a wee one exacting her revenge. As such, I thought it would be fun to have a Baby Pool, so I have set one up over at the BoobLog - details are over there. I apologize for the fact that I am WAY too lazy to set up a 2nd contest over here.
Ketchup
I did very well this weekend - I sent out a slew of emails and made quite a few phone calls. I read quite a bit and even knitted a bit on the NewKid's blanket. I also caught up with a TON of family, so I feel pretty good. It was a Great Aunt and Uncle Bonanza, let me tell you. Although, I have to admit it made me a little sad to think of us potentially moving. Here I was with my Resolve All Stiffened Up, and then I watch Arun gleefully hugging and kissing my great aunts and uncles - to their sheer delight, of course. It made me a little sad to think of my children not knowing my grandma's siblings as well as I do. My great aunts and uncles were very important to me growing up and Arun's middle name is that of my oldest great uncle.
A Magically Delicious Cerebral Venus Book Club Meeting?
Um, I had a CRAZY idea over the weekend. What would everyone think of discussing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows for our next book club meeting? I was thinking this - the book is released July 21st, we could discuss it Monday, August 6th. That is a little over 2 week's worth of reading time which even includes 3 weekends. What do you think? Be honest if you are not down with it.
I know, I know........I keep mentioning this whole “I’m having a baby thing” like a tiresome broken record - I'm obsessed. I am due to give birth in less than 2 weeks and by 7/13, at the very latest, I should have a wee one exacting her revenge. As such, I thought it would be fun to have a Baby Pool, so I have set one up over at the BoobLog - details are over there. I apologize for the fact that I am WAY too lazy to set up a 2nd contest over here.
Ketchup
I did very well this weekend - I sent out a slew of emails and made quite a few phone calls. I read quite a bit and even knitted a bit on the NewKid's blanket. I also caught up with a TON of family, so I feel pretty good. It was a Great Aunt and Uncle Bonanza, let me tell you. Although, I have to admit it made me a little sad to think of us potentially moving. Here I was with my Resolve All Stiffened Up, and then I watch Arun gleefully hugging and kissing my great aunts and uncles - to their sheer delight, of course. It made me a little sad to think of my children not knowing my grandma's siblings as well as I do. My great aunts and uncles were very important to me growing up and Arun's middle name is that of my oldest great uncle.
A Magically Delicious Cerebral Venus Book Club Meeting?
Um, I had a CRAZY idea over the weekend. What would everyone think of discussing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows for our next book club meeting? I was thinking this - the book is released July 21st, we could discuss it Monday, August 6th. That is a little over 2 week's worth of reading time which even includes 3 weekends. What do you think? Be honest if you are not down with it.
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