Most of these are actually VEGETABLES, right?

So, my Week of Positivity went quite well. Was it because I slapped on a pair of rose-colored spectacles on Monday? Or was it just a coincidence? Either way it doesn't matter because you know what? Being nice all week was kinda boring. I have one more meme coming up next week that will help set this blog straight again.

In other news, my #1 Mothering Tip for this week is The Shirt. I gave Arun one of my old, unwashed shirts and this thing has worked MIRACLES. I have lost count of the naps that he has taken in his crib and it helped tremendously with the Separation Psychosis when leaving him with Cousin J.

Friday is FryDay

This was the HARDEST meme because I had to pare it down. I almost expanded it to include 20 things, but that would have been embarrassing. Anyway, here are things I love that are FRIED. Sweet tooth? Nah - my weakness has always been food made better with the Glory that is Grease.

And don’t even bother telling me that you can BAKE these things. Doesn’t count. Bah.

#1 Oklahoma Joe’s French Fries

#2 Kruncher’s Jalapeno Potato Chips

#3 Jalapeno Poppers

#4 Jalebi

#5 Indian Hot Mix

#6 Crab Rangoon

#7 Samosa

#8 Krispy Kremes

#9 Calamari

#10 Onion Blossom

Mmmmm.....makes my arteries crispy just thinkin’ about this list.


My Very Favorite Small Fry

He may curse me later, but I love that I am in charge of his wardrobe for the time being and can make him wear his dorky safari cap when we are doing something as mundane as hanging out in Loose Park which is in the middle of the CITY.

Why is it called “taking a dump” when in reality, you are LEAVING one?

So, Separation Psychosis is reaching a fever pitch in the rancid le manse. I never thought the day would come that sees me on the toilet with a baby gripping my knees desperately, peering expectantly at me while I do my “bidness”. There you have it. Life’s Little Moments that I am always referring to in this blog. Not exactly Hallmark-worthy, but you take what you can get.

Thursday is MissedTVDay
Remember when Thursday was THE day you rushed home to watch TV because your VCR/TiVo combo was smokin' hot and couldn’t handle the action and you would need to watch at least ONE show that night LIVE or you would totally miss out on the watercooler scene Friday morning at the office? Not all of these shows were ever on the Must See TV lineup, but they came to mind as shows that I really liked. Most of them are obscure because I tried to choose the "loser" shows that the networks canned. Some of them never even made it past 4 episodes.

Damn. I miss Thursday night TV. Joey, I hardly knew ye and I hardly cared.

#1 Herman’s Head

#2 Three Sisters

#3 Stark Raving Mad

#4 Joan of Arcadia

#5 Love Monkey

#6 Out of Practice

#7 Committed

#8 Miss Match

#9 Cursed

#10 Arrested Development


My Own Little Love Monkey

Soon after I shot off these snaps, I told Arun that it was time to quit playing and go inside so that Mama could post the snaps to her blog. If I am going to document his babyhood, he’s just going to have to take one for the team. Priorities, you know?

Isn't Humpty Dumpty just another case for Natural Selection?

No, I got virtually nothing done on my To Do list - I should have noted that I didn’t plan to get it DONE on Tuesday and that I was really just REPORTING it for future procrastional purposes. In particular, I will be purchasing that dress/sandals combo like NEXT week Friday, the day before the event, because I might lose 10 pounds by then. What? YOU NEVER KNOW. Anyway.............

Wednesday is HumpDay
Guys I would consider to be Humpable Haute Hotties. This was another difficult list, but I had to draw a line - with the exception of #3, only live, breathing, non-AARP Hotties are included. #10 was a gimme, of course.

#1 Brad Pitt (pre-Amnesty International Days)

#2 Colin Farrell ( pre-Rehab Days)

#3 Amitabh Bachchan (granted special non-AARP exemption for his utter HOTness)

#4 Colin Firth

#5 Hugh Grant

#6 Denzel Washington

#7 Jeremy Northam

#8 Russell Crowe, ( pre-Phone Hurling Days)

#9 Johnny Depp

#10 X

In other news, I still haven’t gotten to see my dad because (negative content edited by Pollyanna-esque Blogger) and he doesn’t want me to bring Arun to the hospital. I cleared my social calendar this week thinking I would be hanging out at the hospital, so I have doing impromptu-ish sorts of things all week. FUN, actually. On Monday, I loaded up my Garage Sale Find jogger stroller in my trunk to air up the tires. After the tires were full? It would NOT GO BACK IN THE TRUNK thus lending itself for the opportunity of a total WTF? Moment replete with head-scratching and much scowling. I managed to squeeze it in the front passenger seat. Since I already had it loaded in the car and the likelihood of THAT happening anytime ever AGAIN was slim, I thought we should give it a First Run over at Deanna Rose. I LOVE the butterfly garden, so we headed straight over to it and sat in a a swing, enjoying the gorgeous weather. A gal and her son passed by and she paused. She said “I’ve seen your son somewhere.” We went through a few scenarios where she might have seen my son and then she said, quietly “I know where it is. I think I read your blog.” Yep - it was Amanda, who has commented here before. It turns out, we live very close to each other, mere blocks. We hung out together in the garden and watched her adorable son N run circles in the sprinklers. It seems she didn’t think I was too much of a freak because she did email me, so I can see us getting together again in the future. Very cool.

In other, other news, Arun has successfuly gone down in his crib for a nap TWICE this week. For the past 2 weeks, he has refused to go down in his crib for naps and it has been SO frustrating (negative content edited). I think teething and our wacky schedule contributed to this - for the past 2 weeks I have been holding tight to the nights because he sleeps like a ROCK at night - it's the damned cats waking me up these days. But naps? Were misery because (negative content edited). When I read somewhere that putting an article of your clothing in the crib with your baby can help ease their anxiety, I thought “Why not?”. So far, it has WORKED.....fingers furiously crossed....


Future Haute Hottie

Old picture, still Dead Sexy. Although, he better be the type who actually calls when he SAYS HE’S GONNA CALL. My promise to you, Future Babes of America, is that his mama will do her best to teach him RIGHT.

What's the Big To Do?

In what may go down in the Annals of Blogging History as the most boring post EVER.

Tuesday is ToDosDay
Not that I will actually get all these DONE today, but rather, this is my To Do list. Actually, just the Top 10 as the entire list is MUCH longer.

1. Read “Snow Falling on Cedars” by this Sunday. A nearly 500 page book that I only just began YESTERDAY.

2. Weed the yard.

3. Tidy up spare bedroom and wash the sheets (refer to "other news" below).

4. Pick up/Drop Off Dry cleaning.

5. Locate some curry leaves ASAP since our regular store is out of them and the guy who usually supplies them is in India for the next month and in the meantime, we are starting to literally eat our OWN curry plant alive. I'm starting to feel a little sorry for it.

6. Buy a dress and sandals for swanky soiree coming next week.

7. Organize basement - segragate all junk to one room that will be designated for the Garage Sale to End All Garage Sales of 2007.

8. Begin process of purging the house of Junk for said garage sale.

9. Back up all the Mac files as I haven’t done so since early MAY.

10. Get the garage in order. It’s driving me crazy.

In other news, my dad is back in the hospital (negative content deleted by blogger emulating Pollyanna this week) but fortunately, the Glad Game makes me see the bright side of having my step-mom staying with me again.

In other, other news - our boy has insurance! RETROACTIVELY. Meaning, they will be paying the bills. Bring on the honey roasted peanuts!

Cover your eyes, folks. That would be the sun coming out from the clouds.


Slapdashed Snaps
On my To Dos for the LONGEST time was to purchase chairs for our patio - the weird slab of cement just off our deck (it used to hold the hot tub of the Previous Owner. Bleh. We are NOT Hot Tub People). Anyway, this slab of cement needed something to perk it up and I tried in vain with plants and a reclining chair. What it REALLY needed was a pair of Adirondack chairs, but DAMN. Those things are EXPENSIVE. Unless, you find a great plastic pair at Target for $30. Score.

Now, virtually all day long there is some shady spot in my backyard for me to sit in. Which makes me very happy.

This is the view when I am sitting in them. Not bad, eh?

Why don’t people wearing rose-colored glasses ever see Red?

Cripes, last week was a DOWNER. Therefore, to assist in stemming the spate of negativity that emanates from this blog, I am going to post only Happy Thoughts this week. Like, only thoughts that are HAPPY. Furthermore, I’ve always maintained that the meme is the Rodney Dangerfield of blog fodder. Therefore, everyday this week I will do a memed theme dedicated to the particular day of the week. I may also update with actual stuff going on in between, BUT my promise to you, Dear Reader, is that this blog is going to be so light and carefree and pink and frothy and SO fucking HAPPY that you’ll wanna stick one of those teeny little umbrellas in it.

This week is dedicated to Pollyanna and Rodney Dangerfield.
She is how I wish the world was and Rodney is how the world IS. I salute both of them.


Monday is FunDay
Things I find fun, enjoyable or entertaining.

1. Naps. Namely, my kid’s. I dread that day when Naps go away, but thankfully, that means Kindergarten will be next in order. I would only be slightly exaggerating if I admitted that I love my kid MORE when he is sleeping. In fact, he is snoozing RIGHT NOW and the Love? It is flowing like the Muddy Mo right now.

2. A fresh bowl of sunflower seeds and new book. Both waiting to be cracked open. Refer to #1 because these days? #1 and #2 go hand in hand.

3. Cleaning my kitchen. Seriously. I clean the kitchen at least 2-3 times a day. It makes me feel good. If you come to my house and my kitchen is dirty? Call 911 because shit ain't RIGHT.

4. Cooking a great, 4-course meal and having loved ones over to partake. I usually only cook 1-2 courses for just X and I, so to make more is a challenge that I enjoy. Throwing out a bunch of dishes at once on the table, perfectly timed so that each has JUST finished cooking and are their freshest is a very triumphant feeling.

5. Game night. Of all the things I miss most from my Pre-Kid days, I miss Game Night the 2nd most (refer to #2 for the thing I miss MOST). I miss having girlfriends over - each one entering my home toting their favorite board game, a snack and a bottle of vino. I love mixing up my friends and seeing their personalities come out in the competiveness of something as simple as Cranium, Scattergories, Trivial Pursuit or Wit’s End.

6. Sitting on my deck or front steps. I LOVE sitting outside. One of the things I appreciate most about this house is that the back deck starts getting shady around 4pm and the front steps have a great view of the sky while the sun sets. It’s not uncommon to find me out there in late October/early November huddled under a blanket because I am just not ready to give the outdoors up.

7. Thursday nights in downtown Lawrence, KS. Many weeks I go to Lawrence on Thursday nights and grab a light dinner on Mass. St. with my mom. Then, we grab a cup of joe (Aimee’s, Milton’s, or Z’s Espresso) and sit on a bench on the sidewalk to watch the world go by. Utter bliss.

8. Driving. I enjoy driving and exploring new ways to get around. The GPS in our car has certainly added a new element to this because now, I can meander at will, secure in the knowledge that I can always find my way back home. I also enjoy driving the Ridiculous Car. I appreciate the irony that I finally got a car that “can hang”, but now I have a CARSEAT in the back. Of course, it’s probably a GOOD thing Noodle Neck al Dente is snoozing in the back because that helps my lead foot keep all the Car’s little ponies at a reasonable pace.

9. A nice, savory meal with great service. It’s not just enough to have delicious food, but to have it served with a smile? Or better yet, get a personal greeting from the owner? Cherished.

10. Any quiet moment that X and I can grab where we can just sit and watch our son at play - be it on the living room floor, out in the yard or in bed. It’s a sweet gift to have the luxury of Time to be able to sit and marvel at the simple things that Arun is figuring out right now - how to pick up a leaf, how to push a toy car, how to sneak up on a kitty, how to climb the stairs, pop a pill.....

Simian Snaps
Since snaps of the kid fulfill the Fun Requirement of this week’s postings.............

Other things I enjoy? Watching my son giggle and laugh while playing with a $5 Garage Sale Find toy. LOVE IT. Did you notice the “$5” part? That’s the BEST part. I shot off a TON of snaps of him with this and had a hard time deciding which to post. Also, notice how that Little Red Fuck Elmo not only managed to ingratiate himself into my son’s life but also into his WARDROBE. Oh, Shit - only positive stuff, right? Should I admit that the Little Red Fuck is actually not that bad and I am finding myself starting to not mind him? Nah. That would be overkill on the Smarm for this blog.

It might explode under the pressure.