Holy Shit. Two Weeks ALREADY?

Two Weeks and TONS of Tricks of My Sleeves Already

Good grief. I can’t believe Arun is two weeks old. I can’t believe he will finally wear his little Halloween outfit that I purchased back in AUGUST, in a fit of prenatal excitement. I can’t believe that nursing him is not agonizing anymore. I can’t believe that he gained 13 freakin’ ounces when I had him weighed last Thursday. In short, I still can'tbelieve the little dude is HERE. Wandering around in a delusional haze of sleep deprivation will do that to a person, I suppose.

I had someone comment that I seemed pretty relaxed about the whole affair, and I would say that for the most part, I AM pretty comfortable with most of what's been going on. I am still shaking my head at how much easier this has been than I thought*. Frankly, the hardest times with Arun so far pale in comparison with some of my past jobs. Furthermore, Arun comes with some obvious perks that my prior gigs never ponied up - at least Arun is not a lazy, negative, ladder-climbing, backstabber, right? (although I can't seem to shake the whole "On-call 24/7" part. DAMMIT.) Anyway, Arun is so damned snuggly and sweet right now that a poopy diaper here and a squalling fit there are worth the price of admission. He also frequently rewards us with what I have been calling “accidental smiles”. Of COURSE, he is way too young to actually be doing REAL smiles, but often, after he has eaten and is lying in a drunken, milk-induced stupor, his little mouth will purse left and right into little smiles. He has even laughed twice, which actually, was a tad creepy since newborns don’t show much emotion. It will certainly be adorable when he does all this shit for real, though.

As comfortable as I feel in this new role, I still have had my Freak Out moments. I am still not comfortable bathing him, for example. Thank goodness, the kid doesn’t have stinky sweat yet as his mama has been quite neglectful in the bathing area since I am still scared to do it. The umbilical cord stump didn’t help - which brings us to my other Freak Out moment. No one warns you how gross it is when the stump falls off. I thought something was WRONG and frantically called the Birth Center at the hospital to speak to a nurse. I had imagined the stump falling off and my precious baby’s perfect little belly button would magically appear. SO NOT THE CASE. My other freak out moment? The 1st time his little head hunched over in his car seat.** I drove home the whole way in Niagara Falls-worthy Tears Fest after having stopped to try and prop his noggin back up to no avail. I was only 5 minutes from home, but they were the longest 5 minutes of my life, with my accelerating slower than my Grandma at every stop light, people honking and zooming to get around me. OH MY - how far I had come since I was that very asshole driver myself a scant 2 weeks ago. Paybacks are a bitch, they say.

So again, everything is still going well thus far. He nurses like a champ and for the most part, sleeps so well. With one exception. We have what I have been calling the Witching Hour. From the late evening - say around 9-10 pm to about 12-1am, he is very fussy. He doesn’t actually launch into real crying or screaming, as long as we hold him. THANK GOD for the book The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp AND for my very sensible doctor. Why? Both have sanctioned that a little co-sleeping is not harmful to a child as long as 1) the parents are not obese and 2) the parents aren’t drunk . As my doctor observed, the majority of the world co-sleeps and it could be argued that we Westerners are the weird ones. NO, I don’t plan on having a family bed and certainly, Arun is going to be sleeping in his own damned bed for the most part. I did not get married to X so that we could live like mere roommates. If you know what I mean cough....cough..... Anyway, pulling Arun into bed with us for a few hours each night until he gets over his fussiness works like a charm. We suspect the fussiness is due to gas, judging by the all the Party Noise going on his relatively empty diaper. Furthermore, he sleeps in his bassinet or his crib (during the day at least) the majority of the time, so it’s not like that is a problem. Finally, X himself was a co-sleeper and he still managed to go Ivy League, so I seriously doubt we will ruin our son’s future by having him sleep with us for a few hours a night.

So, I weighed myself and I SHIT YOU NOT - I am at my pre-pregnancy weight. Good news, right? ! Bad news??? I am STILL overweight and have no baby to blame now. Again, I must emphasize that I was not PROUD of my 22 lb weight gain, but was RELIEVED. With my height, if I had gained anymore weight than the 22 lbs, I would not have been able to walk and would have been miserable. So there you have it ---- Relief vs. Pride ---- Big difference if you stop and think about it. However, I have noticed that I am getting very anxious to get back to the gym. Odd urges for me, because I had NO desire whatsoever to exercise during the pregnancy - in hindsight, I guess that exercising while pregnant made me nervous. When I work out, I like to push myself hard - for the adrenaline rush - you can't do that while toting around a bambino in your belly. So, now that there is nothing to worry about, I can't wait to get back on the elliptical machine and feel the burn. I must still wait 4 more weeks, though. Sigh

Anyway, I present for you some more pictures of the little guy. Soon, I must post a picture of him with X, so everyone can see where Arun got all of his looks. There was no chance we were going to make millions from a “switched at birth” scenario because it was pretty obvious which kid was OURS - or at a minimum, X's . There is nary a gene of mine that showed up in the little guy - except for his personal thermometer - he is just as sweaty and hot as his mama. Poor kid.

*NOTE: I said EASIER, not EASY - see the difference? Of course, there are hard times! I had always said that I was more scared of the first 6 weeks than that actual labor, so I am relieved that it has not been worse.

**And YES - the car seat was inspected by the highway patrol. That was not the problem. I was the problem!

The Hair. Oh my God, the HAIR.
Because this hair requires a daily wash/wetting down, Arun is already used to having warm water poured over his head AND receiving a good combing AND getting a good brush through as well (the brushing is ESSENTIAL - if I leave it just as a comb-through, you can see the comb tracks - much like a little old man's bad combover). He actually falls asleep during what has become his daily head massage.

Good night. And Good Luck
My mantra for every evening as I carefully place him in the bassinet.

I LURVE my Auntie J.
I have to say, I am SO grateful for my sister right now. She has held my hand through every new trauma these past weeks. I may even have to upgrade the minutes on my cell phone plan. I also realize I was the biggest hypocrite because I was not that supportive of her when she was breastfeeding and didn’t help her that much. She is having Baby #3 (Only Niece) in December and fortunately, I will have one last chance to help her - at a time when she will need it most since Older and Younger Nephew are a handful as it is. So, I have already apologized and as usual, she has forgiven me for being such an ass. Therefore, if I am indeed all that relaxed, she deserves much of the credit.

Thanks little sis. I lurve you, too!

What do I miss most from my former life?

Hands down - I miss being online.

So far, my TV viewing has not been interrupted too much - I quickly realized I won’t have time for the stupid shows I used to watch, so I pared down the recording list on the DVR. The first to go - Desperate Housewives. I’d much rather watch my baby’s eyelashes grow than sit and watch a show that had so much potential its 1st season enter such a sophmoric decline as it has this 2nd season. Also, I still am able to read, albeit not nearly as much before the Monkey arrived - as long as I can read a little bit, that is enough to keep me going. I had a friend confess that she read ONE SINGLE book during the first year of her daughter’s life. I would go INSANE if I didn’t read.

Anyway.......so, yes - I miss email, news, and blogs. I have tried to keep up on the news via TV, but it isn’t the same. I hate TV news - I feel as if I am being force fed the stupid shit that someone else has decided FOR ME is so very important. I much prefer to read news feeds via Yahoo! and Google, thank you very much. I am such a news junkie, that for the 1st week of Arun’s life, I would quiz X on the daily news - what was going on? What are the headlines? Unfortunately, X could give a crap less about celebrities, so while he apprised me of the major news, I totally missed the fact that Britney was already whoring out her new child for photos.

I miss email! That is my link to so many of my friends and I feel a bit out of touch and lost. This is compounded by the fact that I have so many things to say to my friends and it is frustrating to not be able to pound out emails like I used to.

And finally - I miss blogs! I am glad that I have been able to keep up on posting a bit on my own blog, but I miss reading my blogroll. It’s amazing how so very connected you can feel to people that you have never met. Last night, I finally was able to get some time to start the long process of catching up and it felt good.

We are getting a sort of schedule down, but of course, time will tell whether we can keep it. Overall, things are going so great that I hesitate to even TYPE THAT for fear I will jinx myself! I still have to wake the little monkey up for night feedings - I am getting him weighed today and if he has hit his birth weight, I will start letting him sleep as long as he wants during the night. I will say that sleep deprivation hasn't seemed to hit too hard because as long as I can get 2.5-3 hours at a stretch, that seems to be enough to get me through a complete sleep cycle. I will admit that I am a little paranoid because breastfeeding aside, this has been much easier than I had anticipated. I was more scared of the first 6 weeks than I was of actual labor. So far, when Arun cries, it usually easily remedied by feeding, swinging, pacifier, swaddling, or holding him close while swaying back and forth. I WISH he would also cry for diaper changes - it would help me monitor that situation better if he would help out a bit. Finally, breastfeeding is going MUCH better - the little guy is a greedy gut and latches right on these days.

I do wonder if the fact that my past few jobs were SO STRESSFUL, that having such a cute bundle to take care of pales in comparison?? Even when he does scream bloody murder or poops more than such a tiny body should be allowed to, it is so worth the little grimaces and smiles that he offers up as a reward.

Rancid Rant: SO, this week, X had to travel back to Virginia. As usual, a few people had comments that were critical of that which as usual, pissed me off. People don’t realize that X and I make these decisions TOGETHER. This is not just X's job, it is his company in which he is a partner with 2 other people - other families besides our own little threesome rely on this company. If I had asked X to stay home this week, he would have. As it was, I knew it was important that he be there this week. Besides, my mom has been clamoring to come over. When I first told my mom that X was traveling this week, before she could stop herself she blurted out “Oh good!”. She quickly apologized and we had a good laugh over it. Am I happy that X travels so much? Nope - but neither is HE. He was pretty upset that he had to leave on Sunday - he has so many stresses on him now and I see it as my job to help support him. Isn't marriage supposed to be a partnership?? So yes, I get a little defensive when people act like my husband just abandoned me. sigh

Anyway, I realize this blog has turned into the Monkey News Network 24/7. Right now, there isn’t much else to post about. I am completely and utterly obsessed with his nursing cycles now, so just be glad I am not endlessly posting about THAT.

At least I didn't offer up an update on the Status of My Nipples. Do I get credit for that?

Care for a quickie?

Very quickly - the kid is temporarily distracted by the Ocean Wonders Aquarium in his crib. We are starting naps this week in the crib so he can get used to the digs that he will be shuttled to in a few months.

I have SO many things to post about, but as you can imagine NO TIME. We survived our first doctor’s visit which was followed by a frantic visit to the hospital (early Friday evening) for a bilirubin test since the little guy was still a bit jaundiced. Through a miscommunication with the lab and the doctor, we didn’t receive the results right away, so I was a weepy mess the whole weekend. Every new mom says it, but seriously - you REALLY don’t know how much you will love your new little person until you hold him/her in your arms. X is pretty laid back, but even he was on edge. The plus side is that I got a crash course in nursing in public while waiting for test - after that, I definitely felt more comfortable with the whole nursing thing.

Jaundice aside, everything is going swimmingly. Since Arun is such a deep sleeper, I still have to set an alarm for the early morning feedings or else we will BOTH sleep right through them. Please, OH PLEASE let this be a trend - once he hits 2 weeks, I will be letting him sleep as long as he wants. Nursing is getting better with each day - he is a GREAT eater and the pain is now akin to sharp pinching as opposed to a gaping gunshot wound in my chest.

I am wondering whether I can buy a hip holster for my camera. I am constantly up and down the stairs after the thing. Arun doesn’t even think twice about the flashing lights in his face now and I fear he will probably grow up thinking “paparazzi” and “mama” are synonyms.

Finally, all hail the Fisher Price Take Along Swing , the patron saint of Peaceful Babies and Productive Mamas everywhere.

OH SHIT. Must go NOW - I haven't figured out the repeat option on the Aquarium yet. MUST READ THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL SOON.

Coming soon to a Blog near you!!!
Next Week: Cagey tackles Assvice (Definition: Unsolicited Child Rearing Advice).

Isn't he lovely?

mymonkey,
originally uploaded by Cagey333.

Okay - Nipple Munch 2005 (This year's Theme: "Gnaw 'em til they're raw") is getting better and better. I am just so grateful is he a hungry little monkey so far.

I have to admit - it is a bit disconcerting to have a child that looks NOTHING LIKE ME WHATSOEVER. No need for a paternity test on THIS kid, that's for sure.

Anyway, so far the newest client in my Purveyor of Food business is a good customer. The pay sucks, but the bennies are worth it.

Better than Big Al, damn straight.

How in the hell does Pamela Anderson sleep at night?

Warning: Ick Free Blog Factor has been temporarily suspended for this post.

I have always maintained that hot tears shed in a hot shower makes for an easier cleanup. I tested that theory at about 4:00 am this morning as I desperately took a shower to relieve the freakin' cantoloupes that have appeared OUT OF NOWHERE on my chest yesterday. OH MY GOD - THE AGONY. No one warns you this happens when your milk comes in!!!!!! In all the handy-dandy books, there is mention of "relief for engorgement" or some other bullshit to that effect. Anyway, my sister's milk always comes in really soon like this and she said it should get easier in a day or two. I think the hardest part is that I am a side sleeper/stomach sleeper. When you have rock hard breasts, there is no choice but to sleep on your back WHICH I CANNOT DO. Long, long night........

Also, take it from me because I learned it the hard way - if you are going to breastfeed and are going to pump. READ THE INSTRUCTIONS for the damned breast pump and STERILIZE it BEFORE the kid comes. I thought I had a couple of weeks to figure out the breast pump thing! It does not work out very well when you are already engorged, it is 2:00 am, and you are in severe pain. I am kind of laughing - kind of not.

Overall, everything else is going great - I couldn't ask for it to be going any better - at this point (Note: Subject to Change) the monkey is very easy to calm down and is easily sleeping in 3-4 hour shifts. Just like his mother, he is a heavy sleeper and is a pain in the ass to wake up.

Oh and where WAS the the little monkey during all the drama last night? He slept like a baby, while I cried like one.