Rancid Raves

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Look Who's Coming for Dinner

2012-01-27T10:42:00.000-06:00

"Our dietary requirements are kind of strange, so please feel free to say, "WTF?" and tell me that we need to go out instead. I failed to really consider this when we set things up. Right now, Victor is a vegetarian that also does not eat chocolate, eggs or cheese. Oy. I, on the other hand, am supposed to eat meat or eggs at every meal and typically stay away from rice and pasta at night because they cause my blood sugar to shoot up. Awesome, right?"

Whoa, Nellie.

Normally, when I cook for Indians, I prefer to make Average Jane's Baked Ziti with Roasted Vegetables. It is a dish that has a beautiful presentation and it can easily be modified to suit most taste preferences (meat, no-meat, spicy, no spicy, less pasta for low-carb options, etc.). However, I already knew about "Emily's" low-carb needs and I had started to toy with serving Chicken Marsala. But then, the semi-vegan bit threw that out the window. What initially gave me pause is that I would need to do TWO main dishes, one vegetarian and one with meat. And that meant that I was going to have to go with Indian because it is the only cuisine where I have a broad enough skill set to come with such a variety of dishes. It also meant that I was going to have pull out the big guns (er... Santoku knife?) and make a Super Speshul Indian Meal since"Emily" and "Victor" know their Indian food.

Fortunately, Emily's and my fellow Gori In Arms, The Big, Bad, Blonde Bahu, had recently linked to this black-eyed peas recipe which was To Die For. I made it on New Year's Day and as I was cooking it, Anjali and I were constantly stealing bites from it. So! There it was... the all-important veggie main dish I needed. In the end, for the main dishes, I went with the black-eyed peas curry with coconut and spinach and a Malayalee-style chicken curry with coconut and cashews. For the sides, I served a green bean thoren and a spicy tomato dhal along with parathas and basmati rice.

For record, both Emily AND Manoj were like "Um, maybe we should go out?" and I was all "Um, no. This is FUN!!"

So, thank you, Emily, for that culinary gauntlet.

I did make a few small modifications to the original recipe. Also, I prefer my recipes to be simply stated in steps, so I retyped it and thought I should share it here. This is seriously one of the BEST new dishes I have made in a long time and it will definitely become part of our rotation. Even though it is a vegetarian dish, it is rich with flavor and very satisfying. Yum.

Black-Eyed Peas With Spinach and Coconut Curry

Ingredients:
2 cans of black-eyed peas,drained rinsed
1 medium onion, finely chopped
5 garlic cloves, finely chopped
1/2 tsp ground ginger
1 large tomato, finely chopped
1 bundle of fresh spinach, finely chopped
1 can of coconut milk
2-3 tbsp oil (vegetable or canola)
freshly chopped cilantro leaves for garnish

Ground Spice Mixture:
1/2 tsp turmeric
1/2 tsp garam masala
1 tsp red chili powder, to taste
2 tsp ground cumin powder
1 tsp ground coriander powder
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper, to taste

Preparation:
1. In a large pot on medium high heat, add the oil. When hot, add the onions and fry until softened and brown. Then add the garlic and ginger - fry for 1-2 minutes.

2. Add the ground spice mixture and stir for 2-3 minutes until the mixture is fragrant. Add the tomatoes and the black-eyed peas.

3. Stir well and add in the coconut milk. Bring to a boil, then reduce the heat to low. Cover and simmer gently for 20-30 minutes.

4. Add the chopped spinach and mix well. Simmer for an additional 5-6 minutes.

5. Garnish with freshly the chopped cilantro and serve with rice.

The Case of the Two Kindles

2012-01-25T10:48:00.001-06:00

"Literally Literary" is a feature in which I write about books, reading and more books. Why am I going to such bother? My hope is the post title will provide a subtle hint that I am posting about BOOKS. For those of you where the topic of books results in narcoleptic fits thereby causing you to faceplant onto your keyboard, this will allow you to just click away from the horror that is the written word. Also, I simply adore the word "literally", it is literally my favorite adverb. Bonus points if pronounced with a Rob Lowe/Parks n' Recreation affectation.

Special Note: All posts contain non-affiliate links - I do not have an Amazonian Fancy Pants Affiliate Thingie.
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Note: I have several posts lingering in draft mode and I'm working on cleaning them up for publication - this is one of those posts that I wrote about a month ago. I hesitated on this post to include Susan's (aka Whymommy) post in light of the fact that she is not doing well right now. Then, I realized what better way to honor Susan than to point to a well-written post that had absolutely nothing to with her cancer? After all, Susan is so much more than the cancer.)

This post was not sponsored. Also, if you want a well-written review of the Kindle Fire that is spot-on, check out Susan of WhyMommy - she wrote an excellent, informative review of the Kindle Fire!

When the Kindle Fire was released, we jumped on the chance to get one and called it a "family Christmas present". I have to confess, it was SO much fun Early Adopting a gadget, we have not Early Adopted a gadget in years because these days, our Budget puts us on the Naughty Step if we Early Adopt. Also, if I were the Guilty Sort, I would feel bad that I have ended up as the primary user of the Fire. However, I think we have long established that I am not the Guilty Sort, but rather the Greedy, Selfish Sort. Who downloaded Fruit Ninja for her precious progeny to enjoy because Greedy as she is, she still has a soul.

Admittedly, I primarily use the Fire to surf the web and to play Words with Friends. While it is nice to have my books on it, I still prefer to read via my regular Kindle (which is apparently now called the Kindle Keyboard, because Amazon just loves to fuck with us.) The e-ink technology on the Kindle Keyboard is the bomb and I also like that I can organize my books on it. For some reason, the Kindle Fire does not have any way to organize books via shelves or collections and it drives me insane to sift through every single goddamned book I own to get to something I haven't read. Ugh. The other complaint about reading on the Kindle Fire is that it is pretty heavy and you are limited to one side of the device for turning pages. For example, the Kindle Keyboard has buttons on BOTH sides of the device for turning pages left or right. When I snuggle in with a book for an hour or so, I found that my hand went numb from holding the Fire in the same position for so long because it simply does not have that same flexibility for turning pages.

Still, I do love the Fire as a mini-luxury. It is convenient as an "all-in-one" and I will most certainly not be complaining about it the next time I go on a trip. Unless I am traveling for work, I do not travel with a laptop if possible.

My favorite Kindle Fire story is this:

When it arrived, I stood in our kitchen, pulled it out of the packaging and plugged it in to charge -- thinking I would need to wait for awhile before using it. However, the Fire immediately sprang to life, searched for WiFi and asked for a password. I entered our WiFi password and boom! My entire Kindle library was automatically available. I was using the damned thing instantly. Just like the commercial. I still smile remembering that.

I remember when the Kindle was first released and I sniffed haughtily at the thought of reading electronically. I would never give up my books, I promised myself. "Paper forever!", I declared. And yet, here I am with not one, but two e-readers. And I love them.

Sometimes, it is awesome being wrong.

Have you jumped on the e-reader bandwagon? Do you swear by your iPad? While I admit it is far more robust than the Kindle Fire, we simply could not justify the extra $300. I am curious what that extra $300 really buys.

Nice to meet you!

2012-01-17T07:08:00.001-06:00

I love, love social media meetups. Over the years, I have met a fair amount of people via BlogHer, local blogger meetups and Twitter-ish sort of things. Therefore, quite of few of the Imaginary Leprechauns in the Magic Computer Box Thingie have morphed into flesh n' blood folks who have become really good friends. The sort of friends I exchange addresses with, send presents to, add to my Christmas Card list and even invite to my house, deep in the soul-sucking suburbs. The brave new frontier of social media, of course, is Facebook. Last summer, I joined up with a few Facebook groups which I lovingly refer to my "Brown Boys and the White Girls Who Love Them" groups (Note: no one else refers to these groups as such. Just me. Because I established years ago that I have no standards, boundaries or class. Certainly, no class.)

These Facebook groups crack me up because essentially what happens is that we are all so convinced our Desi Boyz Are More Special Than Everyone Else's that all too often threads in particular groups disintegrate into virtual fistfights over Who Is Right on various cultural topics. Which is quite ridiculous because in India/Pakistan/Sri Lanka/Nepal/Bangladesh? Anything CAN and DOES happen. Throw a stereotype against a wall somewhere on the sub-continent of Asia and it will stick. Eventually. Give it time. After all, you are dealing with an incredibly diverse population of people well over a billion strong. Just wait. Trust me, Gentle Reader..... There's a head- bobbing, turban-wearing taxi driver with hopes of owning a Motel 6 out there somewhere in the world. Keep looking, folks. He's there.

Admittedly, I still think my Meat-Eating, Ferragamo Wearing, Malayalee Syrian Christian Indian Boy is pretty darned special and therefore, I WIN THE INTERNET.

Anyway! Through these groups, I came across a gal from Kansas City through one of the aforementioned Facebook groups where we gather and share our hobbies in All Things Brown. Let's call my new friend "Emily", shall we? "Emily" is married to "Victor". So, a month back I invite "Emily" and "Victor" for dinner. "Emily" replies back with an enthusiastic "Yes!" and then proceeds to whip out a long, apologetic list of dietary restrictions that amounted to the equivalent of a culinary guantlet. SO FUN. Challenge gleefully accepted! (Guess what this Friday's Intestinal Fortitude will feature??)

A week before "Emily" and "Victor" are to come for dinner, I come down with a nasty cold. I recover from this cold, but per usual, my sense of smell is all knocked to hell. Everything smells like stale, sour coffee. Which really sucks when you are hoping to cobble together an edible, multi-course Indian meal -- folks, you need your sniffer when you are cooking. I believe the meal came out okay. I think. Manoj said it did and at this point, when I suck at something, Martha Stewart be damned - -Manoj does not hold back.

So, "Emily" and "Victor" show up, the meal is going fine, the four of us have established some basic back stories. The Indian boys are the same religion and had even both lived in the same town back in India for awhile. Ditto for the Gori girls (and we are both Jayhawks! Double bonus!) When the topic turned to employment and included Major Kansas City Employer, we all jumped in on that one.

The evening is merry, everything is bright. Yeah! Success! And then...... I start to feel nauseous. What the hell?? In a few minutes, I go upstairs and commence with Curry Tossing #1. Immediately, I have flashbacks to the Bridesmaids Bug. Have I been struck with some sort of Hostess Curse? Did I anger the Kitchen Gods? I go back downstairs, holding out hope it was the chicken salad I had for a late lunch and not one of the FOUR Indian dishes I had just lovingly prepared and served to two folks from the Internet I had just MET IN PERSON FOR THE FIRST TIME.

During Curry Tossing #2, under the influence of nausea, I convince myself that "Emily" and "Victor" probably watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and are now suspecting that I have a drug problem like Kim Richards. I need to come clean. Wait, that sounds wrong.

So, I come down from Curry Tossing #2 and discover my kids climbing all over "Victor" like monkeys and notice they have coerced him into playing Sequence for Kids (What? Don't your children strong-arm visitors into playing boardgames? No? Just mine?) I choose this moment to quietly inquire if anyone else is feeling sick? No? Not even a little? Whew. I assure them that I am not snorting Blue Sky off of the toilet seat (personally, I prefer countertops), but that it appears the chicken salad may be the culprit, after all

Curry Tossing #3? "Emily" and "Victor" stay a bit longer to appease the Miss Manners of the world, then give each other a desperate Look of Retreat, then they make a polite, albeit hasty getaway.

"Emily" claims that all is fine and they weren't offended by my pretend drug habit or my simian children and that Hey! Let's have lunch sometime! Totally!

In a restaurant.

Of course.

So..... You Think You Want a Turtle/Lizard/Rabbit/Frog/Tarantula/Snake/Parrot

2012-01-11T07:11:00.002-06:00

Note: I mention my pet store a lot in this post, but the pet store did N OT sponsor this post -- all the fancy words presented here are simply MY opinions and should be not be treated as "expert advice". I also wanted to note that The Olathe Pet Store is locally owned and does not carry cats or dogs. I frequent The Olathe Pet Store almost weekly and the owner is very experienced and more importantly, responsible and knowledgable in the care of his animals.

In 2008, we got our first tarantula --- Sofia. We mostly got her because Arun was really into tarantulas at the time and a tarantula is a creature that needs a minimum of care. Also, it would seem that we are Those Parents who are total suckers for their child's every whim. Indeed. Oh sure, it did help that we had been visiting Sofia for months at the pet store and we already knew her to be super laidback and not skittish like Pinktoe tarantulas are normally known to be. I did some basic research on tarantula husbandry before getting Sofia and felt confident that I knew what we were in for. There were very few surprises except for the fact that apparently, you can develop real, life-like feelings for a tarantula. Feelings! Who knew?

Since Sofia, I've dived head-first into tarantulas as a hobby (I just purchased my 5th T last week. Oy.) Also, Arun has added geckos to his much-desired pet list. We've had a crested gecko (who died last year) and for his past birthday, Arun begged for a gargoyle gecko. In fact, he was given a choice between a gecko and a DSi and he still chose the gecko - as he put it "I like pets more than video games." Gentle Reader, it is difficult to resist that sort of earnest reasoning from a dewy-eyed 6 year old sporting an adorable mushroom cloud of hair.

World, meet Chloe.

Along the way of dabbling into the tarantula and gecko hobbies, I have considered other exotic pets as well. We are firmly entrenched in the arachnid/reptile camp for the time being, but I thought it would be nice to document some of the thought processes I go through when considering bringing a new animal into our home. Also, I've been asked all sorts of questions when it comes to exotic animal ownership and in the future, I am going to direct folks to this post.

Research
Read everything you can regarding the pet in which you are interested -- Internet, library, asking folks you know who are in the hobby. Also, most of the hobbies have message boards -- cruise a few of those. It will give you an idea of the sort of crowd you are joining, in addition to any hot topics regarding the hobby. (To Handle or Not To Handle Your Tarantula is a HUGE issue amongst the arachnid enthusiasts and the topic usually garners some heated commentary.)

It also helps to get a feel for what you want to look for in a healthy specimen of what you are wanting to buy - go to a pet store or hobbyist gathering to actually SEE the animal. I learned this the hard way -- I had done all the bookwork on crested geckos but realize now that I did not handle nearly enough of them to get a feel for personality (and I had handled mostly adults, not hatchlings.) I ended up buying a crested who was pretty sluggish and at the time, I thought he was laid back. Now, I realize a crested hatchling should do quite a bit more scampering and jumping around than ours did. I now suspect that our crested was probably not in good health when we bought him.

Age and Gender Does Matter
Often, baby critters are cheaper, but that comes at a cost because it is riskier - an adult has a more established history of health and behavior and therefore, is a safe buy. However, buying a baby is fun because you get to watch your wee one grow. If you do buy a baby, ask the owner how many feedings the animal has had (my store's owner likes his reptile hatchlings to have at the very least, 3 feedings to get a gauge as to health). Also, in many animals, there are striking differences in appearances and color variations between the male and females. Try to get a look at both lads and lasses before making your decision. And! Even more importantly, there can be differences in life spans between genders -- male tarantulas can be found cheaper quite simply because they do not live as long as females.

Allergies and Other Health Concerns
Allergies aren't just for cats and dogs. Tarantulas are venomous, but are not fatal unless you are allergic to bees. Tarantulas also kick off uricating hairs which are painful and itchy -- they seem to affect Arun even more so since he already deals with some skin allergies. Reptiles, amphibians, turtles, tortoises may carry salmonella and it is extremely important to wash your hands after every interaction. Folks with compromised or lowered immune systems need to carefully consider these concerns.

I had him wear gloves, in case Chloe decided to kick a few hairs. Her biting him? Not statistically likely.

Food Source
What will your pet eat? Is the food source expensive? Is there a pet store convenient to your house for getting the food source? What is the feeding schedule? For example, I would love to have a bearded dragon, but I really don't like crickets. Unless I want to be going to the pet store every other day, I would have to essentially keep a cricket farm in my house. We settled on crested and gargoyle geckos because they are a happy medium -- they will eat the occasional cricket and otherwise live on a rehydrated fruit product called Repashy. Conversely, tarantulas only need a few crickets here and there - about every other week or so. I live very near to the pet store and it is quite easy to just cruise through, pick up some crickets and head back home.

Another example is that Arun really wants a snake, but I could not handle buying the food source -- MICE. Sweet, furry, adorable MICE. When Arun can actually drive himself to the pet store to procure mice, I am perfectly okay with him getting a smaller snake -- for example, a corn snake or a ball python (NO Burmese pythons in my home. EVER.) Until then, there will be no snakes in our house because I cannot buy a pinkie, then throw it into a cage and hear it squeal as it meets its doom. I simply cannot. Come to think of it, as much as I hate squirrels, perhaps I should rereconsider that Burmese python.

Life Span
How long will your pet live? Some pets, such as parrots and giant tortoises, can live past your own lifetime. Are you committed to caring for that pet throughout its life? Do you have a plan for your pet should your pet outlive YOU? If your pet has a shorter life span, are you emotionally okay with letting it go? Last year, I bought a male Pinktoe tarantula. I knew that Daniel's bargain price of $15 meant that his time on Earth was limited -- once a male tarantula is mature, they will die during their next attempt at molting (the process where a tarantula sheds its entire exoskeleton, in addition to mouth parts and sexual organs). Sure enough, last month Daniel attempted to molt and died. I was sad, but since I had made an informed decision when I bought him, I was not shocked when he died.

This is Gordon the Gecko, Jr. I sure as hell hope he lives longer than Gordon the Gecko, Sr.

Source of Knowledge and Supplies
I have been very lucky in that I have always had a good pet store nearby who employed knowledgable and responsible employees. Someone selling you an exotic pet might actually be a bit hesitant to sell you a pet -- my pet store even has a document that must be signed. Don't be offended if the pet store employee asks YOU some questions regarding your purchase. A responsible pet store simply wants to ensure their animals go to a permanent, safe home since buyer's remorse can hurt everyone, including the animal.

Hobby Shows and Conventions
Be very wary of buying an animal from a show or convention if this is your first purchase. I bought our crested at a convention and I do believe that was part of the problem. Looking back, I wasn't as informed on the subject as I should have been and I think I made a mistake on that purchase (for example, I had primarily handled juvenile/adult cresteds when doing my research -- I was not as familiar with hatchlings). Conversely, I have no hesitations on buying a tarantula at a show because I have been in the hobby for several years now and have a much better idea of what I am looking for and which questions to ask.

Expenses
Oh sure, that pet might be on sale or appear to be reasonably priced, but he is going to have needs. Food costs money - crickets are cheap, mice are not. Enclosures and accessories are not free. Substrate and cage liners are another consideration.

Anjali has proven empirically that it is far cheaper to build a tarantula and a cage out of Legos (including a blue web.) As you can see, she is very proud of her creation.

Space
Last year, someone was giving away a really cool red-eared slider turtle. I would have loved to have that animal but the space requirements were beyond what I was willing to commit to since a larger turtle needs both a dry and aquatic environment. Furthermore, turtles live for a long time! (See: Life Span) Also consider that if you have bought a baby, that baby will grow, which means more space and potentially bigger enclosures. I now own a variety of enclosures for a variety of sized tarantulas. (And yet, my husband still sleeps with me at night. \)

Care
Tarantulas are minimalists in the care area. I give water about once a week, mist their cages occasionally and throw in a few crickets here and there. Depending on the state of their enclosures, I only clean them every month or so. Conversely, the fish and the gecko have to be fed every day. The gecko needs his cage misted at least every other day. The fish and the gecko poop considerably more than the tarantulas (Rule #1 of Pets: Everyone Poops!) Some animals need a consistently maintained environment - both temperature and humidity need to be considered. When the pilot light on our furnace went out, our house got really cold until we re-lit it. the next morning I lost sleep that night worrying about the gecko getting too cold and spent the night checking on him and trying to snuggle him (He was not as appreciative as you'd suspect.). From a care and handling perspective, I would be okay with a variety of lizards and even a snake, but I have issues with their eating habits (See: Food Source) A dream of mine is to have a veiled chameleon, but I doubt it will ever happen -- chameleons are such emotionally and physically sensitive creatures and their setups are fairly expensive, pretty high maintenance. I am not sure I could give a chameleon the detailed care and specific environment it needs.

Handling
Do you want a pet that you can actually pet? A gecko or a bearded dragon doesn't mind handling. On the other hand, as mentioned, a chameleon does not do well with excessive handling. Various types of tarantulas don't mind handling, but are YOU okay with handling? Even if your pet is mostly in his cage, at some point that pet needs to be removed from the cage while you clean it. In short, you WILL be handling your pet at some point. Whether you like it or not. (If not, you can use this handy, dandy guide to trapping your animal. Works for mice and tarantulas. Dogs? Not so much.)

We don't handle our tarantulas a lot, I actually don't think they enjoy it. We do, however, let them roam around once in awhile. And occasionally play with the Angry Birds.

And now, I shall open the floor to you. Do you have other questions? For those of you also experienced in this area, is there anything that I might have missed?

On Working

2012-01-09T17:17:00.001-06:00

According to recent headlines, my levels of happiness should have shot through the roof when I started working again last month. Yes, indeed -- according to one recent study it was boldly declared that "Working Moms Feel Better than Stay-at-Home Moms". After a working hiatus of over 6 years, you would assume that I would have noticed significant elevations in the levels of my life satisfaction, no?

Studies such as the one I have referenced always make me smile. Often, it is difficult to determine if the sample sizes were selected randomly in a true, statistical sense. More importantly, the sample sizes are generally so insignificant in actual numbers that extrapolating results to a larger population is useless and downright misleading. Additionally, the testing methodology seems to simply stem from a series of subjective interviews and observations with 1300 subjects in 10 locations over a 10 year period of time. Don't get me started on how the media conveniently leaves out that the study was focused quite a bit on part-time working mothers.

It would almost make you think that someone has an agenda.

In December, when I trotted out the door with travel mug in hand, in that true, traditional sense of working which involves Going to An Actual Office With Real, Life-Like People While My Children Are in Daycare (as opposed to the past forays into working that involved me, my laptop and my dining room table), I noticed right off the bat that I miss my kids. I really, really miss them -- seeing them for just a few hours a day is simply not enough for me. They are small and their time with me is so very temporary. I feel this acutely - particularly in light of the fact that Arun will be in school full-time this fall. Furthermore, I hate that Anjali has taken this so hard - she has been crying at dropoff and is vocal in that she would rather I stay home. At night, she squeezes in close and whispers "I miss you, Mama."

I miss our laidback mornings. I miss my messy-haired, sleepy-eyed kids with stinky breath coming down the stairs and snuggling in my lap for a few minutes as they wake up.

I miss walking my kids to school -- Manoj is currently doing virtually all of the school/daycare dropoffs and pickups. I love knowing their teachers, I enjoy seeing directly what is happening in their school environments. I miss connecting with other parents and being involved in all of that.

I miss cooking meals from scratch. We have tried the slow cooker thing, but we are still mostly cobbling together meals via picking through the leftovers in the fridge or doing take out. I miss grocery shopping throughout the week. I enjoy meandering through the store with the kids and letting them pick out whatever they want in the produce aisle. I miss picking through fresh ingredients and trying to come up with fun ideas for the week.

I miss my books and I do miss my social media outlets (Facebook drama notwithstanding. I do not particularly miss that). However, I do not miss my TV shows and in fact, have pared them down even further (Once Upon a Time, Terra Nova I hardly knew ye.)

I miss exercising. This week I am reworking my exercise schedule and am hoping this new routine will work. My mental health NEEDS at least three workouts a week (Four is better, but three at least helps keep the Wolves of Insanity at bay)

However.

I sort of like working, too. I discovered that I have missed the adrenaline of deadlines. I have missed using Big Words. I have missed using my past work experiences and my graduate degree and my CPA license. I have missed all of that. Overall, I missed making a difference that someone else sometimes notices. Believe me, no one in my house notices when I mop the floor or carefully fold all of the laundry.

I missed the strict schedule that kept me on task. My house is generally more organized and cleaner now that I have been working (I religiously use the Simple Mom's Pocket Docket!)

I missed the paycheck. Contributing directly to my family's coffers in a significant way shoots straight to the heart of my self-esteem. I cannot lie, I am keenly aware of what financial sacrifice we are making by my Just Staying Home.

So, has working impacted my overall levels of Happiness? Not nearly as much as I thought it would. Surprisingly so. I had thought for sure that I would be absolutely miserable working and that has not been the case, either. Oh sure, I would rather be Just Staying Home, but the aspects of Working that I do enjoy are helping to balance the parts that I do not relish.

Frankly, to surmise that my Happiness relies upon my employment status is sad and fails to take into account that there is far more to life than just working.

I cannot predict what our future holds. I am not sure if this Working Thing will continue or if I will go back to a life of leisure where I Just Stay Home. However, I do know this:

My level of Happiness is not dependent upon it either way.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Champagne Wishes

2012-01-06T14:05:00.000-06:00

Image Credit: Carmentipa

This post is non-sponsored. I could only wish that Veuve Clicquot would sponsor this post. Fervently wish.

Ah, New Year's Eve -- I really enjoy this holiday even though our past few years have been low-key, even downright boring. Usually, we pick up a pizza, some champagne, a few movies, then we snuggle in for the night. I buy some hats and noisemakers for the kids, but other than the champagne? Our New Year's Eve looks like most of our Fridays.

And I am fine with that. Or was fine with that. This year, we got invited to not one, but TWO bona fide, kid-friendly parties that are mere blocks from our house. Score! I snagged some cheap wine and some moderately priced champagne. I made some Mexicorn dip and threw some pre-made samosas in the oven. And then, we spent an evening relaxing with some equally low-key folks.

Speaking of champagne, one of my favorite parts of New Year's is the excuse to drink it. I love, love champagne - I enjoy the clean, crisp feel on my tongue with a slightly sour finish. YUM. Also, I appreciate how the French view champagne as just another wine, not something to be saved for special occasions. We should drink champagne every day, no? A lovely moment in my life was having a glass of Dom Perignon and it did not disappoint. A dream of mine is to just once have a glass of Crystal. My favorite champagne is Veuve Clicquot, but I do like Moët & Chandon's White Star -- both sell for about $40 a bottle. Since that has been out of my acceptable price range the past few years, I've hunted for a nice California brut and have discovered that a Rhoderer Estate Brut fits the bill.

However, we don't drink our champagne at the end of the night. We drink our champagne first thing, at the beginning of the evening. I do not want to swill and guzzle my champagne. Using one of my cherished hollow-stemmed glasses, I would rather slowly sip and fully savor my drink. Much the same attitude I should have toward life in general.

A perfect way to start the New Year.

Are you a champagne sort? How do you normally spend your New Year's?

In every pothole, there is hope.

2011-12-28T21:14:00.003-06:00

Many, many thanks to my friend Brit - she sent me a care package last week and it included a copy of Mixed Nuts. Not only did her package come on a perfectly perfect day in which I was exhausted and needed a smile, but the movie was really good and also just what I needed. A slightly crazy Christmas movie that will definitely be part of my yearly holiday rotation now.

Christmas was spent in a chaotic whirlwind of family, endless logs of Duraflames, shredded tissue paper and overstimulated children. All sprinkled generously with cheap wine, saturated fats from a variety of God's creatures, starchy carbs and enough real, pure cane sugar to make my pancreas cry, "For the love of Jesus, Uncle already!!!". Let us not forget my personal, Sepia-toned Grinch. One of these years, Manoj will learn the true Spirit of Christmas. Whether he likes it or not.

Despite the curry-doused, anti-thesis to George Bailey who happens to reside in my home (and happily, my bed), the holidays are quite simply, one of the very best parts of being a parent. I relish making the Magic happen for my kids, all the while knowing that over the years, my ability to do so will increasingly diminish in their eyes. As such, I will cherish these years with Ye Olde Team of Chaos in the meantime.

To cap this year off, this week marks a huge push toward purging -- mostly toys and whatever clutter cannot escape my wily grasp as I canvass our house armed with a fierce gleam in my eye and a black trash bag in my hand. In our house, white bags are used for trash, but for Junk Purging, I buy special, heavy-duty black bags. Even Arun and Anjali know to watch me carefully these days.

Ugh. Am I the only one who approaches January with caution? Why does January have to be such a downer? I am fine for the week just after Christmas because New Year's Eve mutes the black hole that Christmas leaves in its wake, but then January rears her ugly mug and ruins everything. Right?

Anyway..... This year, I have some thoughts on how I plan to brighten my mood this year. In the meantime, I am open to YOUR ideas. How do you get through January?

Santa only brought each kid one present and a bonus Christmas fish since Alex the Betta died 3 days before Christmas. Yes, I am a mean mom and only let my kids ask for ONE thing from Santa. MEAN.

Arun's favorite gift was the $3 set of fossilized shark teeth in his stocking. Sure, he likes his DSi (used! bargain! still expensive!), but he likes the teeth EVEN MORE. Because they were once in a SHARK'S MOUTH.

Anjali's favorite gift was her Indian doll Nahji that cost a whole $25. Ask me what she thought of her fancy pants American girl doll that she begged for and hand-picked from a CSI-style lineup of usual suspects. The same doll that has TEETH which Anjali has decreed shall not be on the head of any doll SHE owns. TEETH. The horrors.

Guess who received a second-hand American Girl doll for Christmas from her loving daughter?

Go ahead, ASK.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Cheat Treat

2011-12-23T10:06:00.001-06:00

Years and years ago (1999, specifically) my manager at the time brought in a treat plate from his wife. One of the treats was something called Christmas Crackers and I was completely smitten. I got the recipe from her and all these years thought I had this little gem of a treat that was totally speshual and uneek. I made this treat over the weekend and thought I was sharing the secret of my Speshul and Uneek Cheat Treat with my sister (shhh! It's a secret!) only to find out a saltines version of this is floating all over the Pinterest Universe.

So, despite my sagging balloon, I am going to share this recipe anyway -- primarily because I needed to type it out anyway since I am putting together a holiday recipe book for myself on Paper Coterie (non-sponsored, I will be paying for my recipe book my very own self.)

Seriously, this is a sweet treat even a tweaker could make without burning down the house.

Graham Cracker Christmas Crack
Ingredients
1 cup butter
1 cup brown sugar
12 oz bag mini chocolate chips
15-17 graham cracker sheets(the full sheets, not broken)
1 cup chopped pecans

Preparation

Pre-heat oven to 400.
Melt the butter and sugar on the stovetop. Bring to a boil, stirring frequently.
Line jelly roll pans with aluminum foil. Lay the graham crackers as closely together as possible.
Pour the butter/sugar mixture over the graham crackers. I use a large spatula to smooth the mixture evenly over the crackers.
Bake in the oven for about 5 minutes. Watch closely! I like it to be bubbly and gooey (no worries, it will harden later!)
Pull the cookie sheet out of the oven. Sprinkle the pecans first, then sprinkle the mini-chocolate chips. Again, I use the spatula to spread things around.
Chill sheets until hardened. Then, break the crackers up and dump them into your gaping maw of a piehole. Alternately, you can staple them to your thighs, although this method results in less enjoyment.

Race you to the next stoplight, asshole.

2011-12-21T20:03:00.005-06:00

Most of my past commuting experiences have been highway and interstate. This new client is in-town and the commute is all street traffic, going 35mph to 45mph the entire route. The morning drivers are quite aggressive, but it's laughable watching someone get all Lightning McQueen on your ass for an ENTIRE BLOCK. Oh, sorry about that, buddy! Here, let me eat this bumper in front of me so you can get to the next stop light THAT MUCH FASTER.

Overall, I am SO grateful for this J-O-B experience -- it is with a financial services industry client, which is something I'm quite experienced in, but this company deals in transactions which are completely new to me. My brain hurts every evening because Me No Like No Learning. However, I love the challenge and it certainly helps that it is actually interesting. No, really! Basically, their business is like a financial playground for accountants and it deals with the Also Actually Interesting, No Really! topic of miltary and refuelment activities. All of this is furthered by that the people I work with are generally awesome -- they work hard with minimal horseplay and there is no messing around with silly, useless meetings -- they get their stuff done within a reasonable amount of time. THEN THEY GO HOME. Imagine that! I try to get in around 7 to 7:30 and generally leave by 5:30 or I'm home by about 6pm, 6:30pm at the latest. Not bad. Or at least, I don't think that is so bad. I have never had a better schedule, so for me, this is what qualifies as Not Bad.

However, this J-O-B came at an awful time -- smack dab right before Christmas (Although, admittedly, I paid for our entire Christmas last week with the aforementioned J-O-B. Oh, Henry!) Fortunately, I had enough notice that I was able to finish most of my Obligatory, Not-Fun Christmas stuff -- there were some last-minute gift purchases, furious wrapping of said gifts and some shipping of packages. Still, I was really quite worried about the Obligatory, Actually Fun Christmas stuff. You know, the IMPORTANT stuff.

Friday before last, I pulled Arun out of school for some "family time" so that we could wrap up some of that Obligatory, Actually Fun Christmas Stuff. We visited the Bass Pro Santa, then had some lunch. Normally, we visit the Crown Center Santa, but I simply didn't have time for that this year. And wow -- since Bass Pro Santa utterly blew the boots off Crown Center Santa, all future Santa Visits will be made to Bass Pro. After the Santa visit, we headed to the Union Station for our annual tradition of riding the Holiday Express. I felt a little guilty pulling Arun from school, but we had such a lovely afternoon, I remain unapologetic.

Overall, Team Chaos is handling my working very well. Arun loved going to the daycare last week since it is ran by one of his classmate's mothers. It was a little tougher on Anjali. She did not cry, but was paralyzed with shyness when we went to visit. That is hard to stomach -- watching my normally obnoxious, little hellfire of a girl stiffen with fright. Sigh. I am not sure how long this engagement will last, but it seems I will be onsite for at least 2 more weeks.

If nothing else, my entire little family is getting a little flex in the muscle of Appreciation. Arun has even been HUGGING AND KISSING ME WITHOUT CAJOLING NOR BRIBERY. If you happen to have a little boy in your life, you know how poignent this is.

At the beginning of Christmas, I had made a little Holiday Bucket List for all of the FUN stuff I wanted to fit in (a wee tyke of a Draft that never quite matured enough to be Published). Considering the addition of the J-O-B, we have done pretty good:

Attend the Liberty Hall Christmas Tree Festival in Lawrence KS ( this always kicks off our holiday season -- tradition!)
Decorate gingerbread cookies
Decorate gingerbread houses
Bake the kifli
Do some Christmas sticker crafts
See the Gingerbread House Exhibit in Lawrence KS
Drive through and see the Plaza Lights (However, Mama ain't crazy enough to try and PARK)
Do some shopping in Brookside
Attend the Nutracker Suite performed by the KC Ballet at the Kauffman Center
Do some shopping in downtown Lawrence (sadly, I had to nix this)
Make Christmas Crack (post on this is forthcoming)
Visit Santa
Attend Average Jane's fantastic Cookie Soiree
Make a snowflake garland
Drive through the Neighborhood of Ridonkulous Decorations (seriously, this neighborhood is so over the top that one year, my sister and I nearly got plowed over by a freaking TOUR BUS.)
Christmas Books Extravaganza (I've posted some of our favorites in this post)
Christmas Movies Marathon
Playing outside in the cold, then drinking hot chocolate after (this is something that Arun insists upon doing for some reason)

We still need to make a snowflake garland (I love, LOVE cutting out snowflakes) and do our neighborhood lights cruise.

Fortunately, my family is low-key when it comes to Official Christmas festivities -- we do appetizers/snacks at my dad and step-mom's on Christmas Eve. Then, I host a traditional mid-day dinner on Christmas day where everyone brings a little something. Addtionally, that side of the family is low in the drama-department.

Bring it ON, Christmas.

I'll race you to the next stoplight.

Team Chaos was very conscientious in bringing Santa thank you letters and candy (they did this for Halloween at Boo at the Zoo, too -- taking candy WITH them to hand out as thank you candy to the folks handing out candy. The year before, Arun handed out thank you letters on Halloween night as well. WEIRDOS. Polite, sure. But still....WEIRDOS)

Riding the Holiday Spirit at the Union Station.

See! They DO love each other!

Wait a second. False Alarm! Arun is doing the obligatory move of filial love called "Why you hitting yourself?"

Anjali got all dressed up for her school Christmas concert and willingly posed. What a treat, baby girl!

However, one's party dress is not complete without boots.

It just wouldn't do, otherwise.

Of course not, silly!

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: The Late Edition

2011-12-18T11:38:00.004-06:00

Note: Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude is a weekly(ish) feature about food, food and more FOOD. No, I do not necessarily want to be a food blogger, but I do LOVE to talk about food prep, cooking food, eating food and making sweet love to food.

Okay, maybe not the "sweet love" part. After all, this is not meant to be an homage to 9 1/2 Weeks.

*********

Last year, I wrote about the Story of the Kifli, which included a bit of my baking history and my hopes for my friend Jolene as she fought pancreatic cancer. That post is still hard for me to read because a year later? My friend is gone.

Also, inexplicably, I now bake -- even when it is not Christmas. It started off with cookie dough from Papa Murphy's. Then, I tried out some Amish Friendship bread. Even the over-ripe bananas on the counter are getting nervous, folks.

These past few weeks, I've had the pastry mat out more times than I can count for baking gingerbread cookies (again, via a tub of dough, Although, I have grand plans for next year and have been researching gingerbread recipes. Yes, ME. The Non-baker.) Anyway with practice, I've gotten to know my oven better and have learned that one of the tricks with baking is that the item continues to bake a bit AFTER being pulled from the oven. I have definitely gotten better at gauging that precise moment when things should be pulled.

The original recipe that I've linked to in the past never quite worked. For one, the measurements were WAY off and I was left with a ridiculous amount of the nut filling. This year, I took careful notes so that from now on, I will not have to dig into my addled memory to figure out what I should be doing. After all, I'm not getting younger.

Romanian/Hungarian Kifli Recipe

Ingredients for 1 Batch of Kifli Dough
(I make 4 batches of dough for 1 batch of filling)
8 ounces cream cheese
1 cup butter
3 egg yolks
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 pinch salt
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
(Note: I make each of the 4 batches of dough separately with a hand mixer using dough hooks. If you have a fancy mixer, you may be able to make all 4 batches at the same time. This dough is super sticky and at the end, is VERY hard to mix. Trust me, you want dough hooks and NOT beaters for this bad boy.)

Ingredients for 1 Batch of Kifli Filling
3 egg whites
2 cups ground pecans
1 cup white sugar
(Note: Walnuts and almonds can be substituted for the pecans)

Also:
2-3 cups confectioners' sugar for rolling and decoration

Preparation for the Dough

In a tall-ish mixing bowl with high sides, cream the butter and cream cheese. Stir in the egg yolks, vanilla, baking powder and salt.
Gradually add in flour mixture a little bit at a time until everything is mixed well.
Divide dough into 5 parts, wrap in plastic, and refrigerate overnight (Keep in mind that you will have 20 of these dough thingies, since you are making 4 batches of the dough.)

Preparation for the Nut Filling

Beat egg whites to soft peaks and add sugar a little at a time. Continue to beat the eggs into stiff peaks.
Fold in the ground pecans, and set aside.

Baking
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Bake the cookies for 9 to 12 minutes, until lightly browned. Roll in confectioners' sugar when cool. This recipe makes approximately 300 cookies.

And now, for the pictures!

The kifli production line. I only get out each section of dough one at a time. As they warm up to room temperature, they get even stickier

I roll out a bunch of 1 inch balls at once and line them up. Then, using a pastry roller, I roll each ball into 2x3 inch ovals to about a 1/4 to 1/8 inch thickness. Instead of flour, I use powdered sugar for rolling to keep the stickiness under control.

I add a 1/2 teaspoon of filling, then I fold it over and pinch the sides. Then I continue rolling it over, then I pinch the ends.

Little soldiers, all lined up to march into the oven.

The finished product, all dolled up in confectioner's sugar. Ready for a hot date with my mouth.

Wait a second, that sounded dirtier than intended.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Working Girl

2011-12-09T10:19:00.003-06:00

Note: Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude is a weekly(ish) feature about food, food and more FOOD. No, I do not necessarily want to be a food blogger, but I do LOVE to talk about food prep, cooking food, eating food and making sweet love to food.

Okay, maybe not the "sweet love" part. After all, this is not meant to be an homage to 9 1/2 Weeks.

*********

So, I have a J-O-B. In an actual O-F-F-I-C-E.

The past few weeks have been a flurry of interviews, arranging for childcare, finishing up the Christmas To Do List and most importantly, examining the recent update to the SAS 70 --- its sparkly new sister, the SSAE 16 (non-sponsored!). It's a short-term contract and I will talk more about that next week. After all, today is Friday and I'd rather discuss FOOD.

Yesterday, as Manoj and I were talking about how next week was going to work for us, he mentioned the dreaded word......Take-Out. We already have one day of take-out -- it's Friday -- where I cruise by Papa Murphy's and pick up our usual pepperoni and mushroom deLITE (Non-sponsored! Seriously!) I LOVE this pizza. However, I really still want to have a regular meal Monday through Thursday. (Sidenote: Yes, I realize the same day I purport to know anything about food is the very same day I regularly pick up a pizza. Oh, the irony!)

Listen, I love take-out. And I am certainly willing to fit in one extra day to pick up a piping hot styrofoam box filled with fattening goodies not prepared by Yours Truly. However, I do not want to be eating out for four straight days. Folks, these hips don't lie.

So! My new best friend is the Allrecipes.com Dinner Spinner app (Non-sponsored! For reals!), where I have been digging up some new ideas. I will also probably depend on some of my favorite stir-fry recipes by doing the prep in the morning -- I do see some pad prik kai and kai kratium in our future (Non-sponsored! Duh!) Additionally, I recently purchased a Crockpot (Non-sponsored! Cross my heart, and all that jazz!). This is my first ever Crockpot, so I am still pretty clueless as to what I am supposed to be cooking in this programmable bad boy. I have already made a few of my favorite recipes from Rick Bayless (Non-sponsored! Back off FCC!) with tasty results , but I am ready to branch out.

Gentle Reader, this is me, coming to you with my Santoku knife in hand.

Wait, that sounded more threatening than intended.

Anyway! I need help, folks! What are your favorite quickie, go-to recipes for those days when you are in a hurry? It does not have to be slow cooker recipes.

Wrapping Up More Than Presents

2011-12-01T10:34:00.002-06:00

This is not the "I've Been Too Busy To Post" post. Promise.

I thought, perhaps, I would rather write a "What I Have Been Up To Post" post. October? I hardly knew ye. And November? Did that really just happen? Really?

Bridesmaid Bug notwithstanding, October was ridiculously FUN. We did all the usual fall activities -- pumpkin patch, Boo-at-the-Zoo, pumpkin carvings, multiple dishings of pumpkin curry, a hayride and a bazillion trick-or-treating events, including the extravaganza that happens in our neighborhood every year. Man, I love living in this suburban prairie, soul-sucking it may be. Oh! And we also celebrated Arun's birthday AND I ~~ran~~ slowly jogged the Waddell & Reed 5k (one of the best 5ks I've ever done -- GREAT course).

November? Rose to the challenge of the gauntlet that October threw down. I walked the Jeff Taylor 5k with Average Jane. Later that day, I took the Team of Chaos to see Yo Gabba Gabba Live which was as awesome as Lance DJ fucking promised. The next week, we went to the Shriner's circus which totally delivered. The elephants provided Team Chaos' favorite act of the day by delivering huge, steamy piles of poo during their performance (Sidenote: I am still skeeved about the animal acts and allegations of animal cruelty. Animal acts are NOT necessary and therefore, I remain conflicted about future circus attendances.) I also attended a theatrical organ concert hosted by The Kansas City Theatre Pipe Organ group. On the way home from that concert, I am pretty certain I was about to be carjacked, but I am not comfortable writing about it yet. This is the 2nd time I have had a suspicious event like that happen in Kansas City in the past few years. However, considering how often I go to Kansas City, I suppose those are still pretty damned good odds and I have no intentions of limiting our trips into the city Sigh.

December is shaping up to holding its own against October and November (I have a December Bucket List brewing) Perhaps, it is the CPA in me, but overall, I simply adore 4th Quarter. It's the most wonderful time of the year!

So! As you can see, I haven't posted not for the lack of fodder, but simply because I did not feel like writing here. I did, however, write in my journal for the month of November. Each evening, I took a minute to jot down the favorite part of my day. It was a peaceful exercise, even on a few crummy days, to focus in on the little things in life that make It All Worthwhile.

Before I get back to my Words With Friends queue (ahem), I would like to give a shout-out to a locally owned business. As many of you know, I crave handbags like a tweaker craves Walter White's Blue Sky. For a few years now, I have been on the hunt for a red handbag, but I was looking for a particular shade of red -- a deep, deep hue. Awhile back, I began to think of going handmade instead of designer and I was going to put a call out for local places to hunt (particularly, in Lawrence, KS). Then, I noticed my sister Jill's handbag. As I was inspecting the stitching and hardware, I spied the label. It was none other than Dawn Shew of Growing a Pair, a fellow Kansas City blogger I have known for years. She sells her bags in a shop in Lawrence, but she has an Etsy site, Seams Fine KS, for her bags. I noticed that she did customs. I decided to contact her since I was already impressed by the sturdy stitching, gorgeous fabric and quality hardware on my sister's purse. A custom order would be perfect. I contacted her about a custom order and we began talking fabric and exchanged some photos - I was really impressed with her advice for combining types of fabric in conjunction with colors -- all in relation to how the fabric will wear over the years

A week later and I now have the purse I have wanted for all these years:

The actual red is a just a tad darker and deeper than this shows.

Interior includes a zippered interior pocket and dual accessories pocket. I love how the fabric is pretty thick and the bag has a "structure" to it -- it holds its shape and does not crumple. Also, after all of my years buying designer bags, I am very particular about hardware. The hardware on this really impressed me and the magnetic closure is really strong.
.

My Pretend Lawyer Made Me Write This: I paid full price for this bad boy and it was worth every penny. I did save on the shipping because I drove to Lawrence to pick up the bag personally, not because I am some Special Bloggy Type

There is such a huge movement toward buying local these days. It's nice when it works out even better than buying from a department store!

Left on my local shopping list? I need to troll the entire downtown of Lawrence KS, per my shopping tradition. And most definitely, I will need a gander at Stuff and World's Window in Brookside.

Where is your favorite local Kansas City destination for holiday shopping? I'm always on the hunt for new local goodies.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Giving Thanks

2011-11-18T14:35:00.001-06:00

Note: Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude is a weekly(ish) feature about food, food and more FOOD. No, I do not necessarily want to be a food blogger, but I do LOVE to talk about food prep, cooking food, eating food and making sweet love to food.

Okay, maybe not the "sweet love" part. After all, this is not meant to be an homage to 9 1/2 Weeks.

*********

Like many folks, I love Thanksgiving. LOVE. It's simply about food and family with no rushing around buying gifts, no month-long list of activities that generally results in some of stress or guilt.

Food.

Family.

Unfortunately, my family does not come from a long line of spectacular food traditions. We do the basics, the usual dishes -- most of those dishes arrive at the banquet half-warm after having sat in a car for a minimum of 30 minutes. And I am fine with that -- I love a simple plate of turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing and gravy. Of course, I have to bring Average Jane's Cranberry sauce because canned cranberry sauce will not suffice since I discovered how easy this sauce is to make. And I also bring Mrs. CPA's Funeral Corn (truth be told, I've made Funeral Corn just to eat all regular, non-holiday like. For a little "snack". YUM.) And! Either my Aunt Joan or I will make her delicious Weird Whipped Cream Cranberry Salad. I love cranberries so much that I actively look forward to the mouth sores I get after 2 straight days of eating them. This is the one dish that I truly associate with all of my childhood Thanksgivings -- the salad is sweet and I always felt I was getting to sneak in a little early dessert under my parents' noses.

When I was a kid, we would pack my grandma's house from the basement to the rafters for both Thanksgiving and Christmas. Over the years, we have outgrown that house and now we rent a community hall in a nearby town for Thanksgiving. Easily, 40 of us arrive. Some years more, some years less. It is not warm or cozy as someone's house, but we ALL get to be together for the holiday and that is all we care about. Although, for Christmas, we do separate off into our smaller family groups. Not coincidentally, the quality of the food rises significantly (look for a post on how I am getting serious about Christmas Dinner this year. SERIOUS, y'all.)

So, even though the Thanksgiving food in my family is not all that great, I still look forward to that tepid gravy smothering spoonfuls of cold, mushy stuffing. I am thankful for the opportunity of just hanging out with my dad's side of the family. My grandma's generation is slowly passing away and each year, I choose to cherish the folks who are still with us to celebrate.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: The Fancy Pants Edition

2011-11-11T10:54:00.000-06:00

Note: Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude is a weekly(ish) feature about food, food and more FOOD. No, I do not necessarily want to be a food blogger, but I do LOVE to talk about food prep, cooking food, eating food and making sweet love to food.

Okay, maybe not the "sweet love" part. After all, this is not meant to be an homage to 9 1/2 Weeks.

*********
I love, love frilly, pretty dishes. Lucky me, I have grandmothers and great-aunts willing to donate to the cause.

Honestly, the dishes I appreciate do not have to be in grand fashion or even very expensive. Some of my favorite dishes are the cheap molded glass sort that are supposed to imitate a fine cut glass.

Last year, my grandma gave me 3 sets of her Serva-Snack trays. She used them for functions at her church, but people use paper these days. I think I may have squealed out loud when I opened them up, still in their original packaging. Since I was wanting to move away from paper plates anyway, I was excited to have a solid set of appetizer dishes. Now, I almost always use these now when hosting parties -- they are durable, dishwasher friendly and the perfect size for serving appetizers. The cups are actually too small, but the plates are awesome. I also adore the simplicity of the Colonial Lady pattern. For my Bridesmaids Watch party, I made hand-molded cream cheese mints that were TO DIE FOR. I cannot wait for someone to have a baby or bridal shower just so that I have an excuse to make these again.

I wish my photo skillz could do justice to how pretty this all looked.

When I was in high school, I commented once that I really liked my grandma's silver pattern -- it is the Prestige Grenoble pattern. While I was an undergrad, my great-aunt Joan came across the pattern at an estate sale and picked it up for me. Later, my grandma gave me her collection. I now how have enough silver to easily host a 40+ person dinner. Ridiculous, I know.

This is my very favorite piece. It is a tomato server.

I love the simplicity of this pattern. When I was in college, this was my everyday silverware since I did not really have the money to waste on buying an stainless steel set.

Even for a SuperBowl party, I love getting out my fancy dishes.

Buffalo chicken dip never looked better, folks.

Vegetable Man

2011-10-31T10:52:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, 1967

Sometimes, I wonder what my kids will think of this blog -- this spot I have designated as my happy place. Will they roll their eyes at my posts that were obviously written in soft focus? Will they remember all the times I screamed, got impatient with them or worse, lost my temper? Or will they also view these times through the filter that time mercifully often grants us?

This past weekend, I decided to make a very conscious choice to not yell at them, to not constantly get on them to hurry up or slow down. Each day, I gave them choices and let them decide what we would do for the day. And except for a poor choice on Anjali's part which involved a broken pencil and the surface of our dining room table, the weekend went swimmingly.

The weather was gorgeous and we spent much of it outside. I could not have asked for better, unfiltered memories.

First, we went to Boo at the Zoo at the Kansas City Zoo.

I loved this shot of her feeling the wind on her face.

And bonus, she even willing posed for me. For once.

Arun will almost always pose. Which results in goofy grins.

On Sunday, we went to Schaake's Pumpkin Patch. It was our first time there and it was so utterly AWESOME that we will go nowhere else from now on. It is a lovely, family-run pumpkin patch which offers simple activities - a hayride, hay maze, pumpkin slingshot, etc.. There were no over-the-top amusement park things that so many patches feature these days. This was all about picking the perfect pumpkin.

Or riding them, as the case may be.

Next year, we will go BEFORE the first hard freeze, before all the vines have died. Oops.

We saw some witches who appeared to have been tippling the potion.

After Schaake's, we went to the Natural History Museum at KU.

We had a gander at the mosasaur hanging in the front entrance.

And encountered some angry fish.

And an angry girl apparently channelling Olivia Newton John.

Fashion victim, indeed.

The Font Geek in me will rue the day they update all of the information placards.

Then, we went home and carved the pumpkins.

I was skeptical about Arun's choice, but this was truly beautiful.

Even thought it was full of worms (GROSS and yet, Halloween Appropriate)

My favorite emoticon. It's a design I've done before, but decided to revisit because I love it so.

All in all, it was a perfect weekend.

No filter required.

Alan's Psychedelic Breakfast

2011-10-27T09:46:00.002-05:00

Pink Floyd, Atom Heart Mother 1970

This is a post title that I thought surely I would never use. Find out why it seemed appropriate, later in the post. (Gentle Reader, cue the ominous foreshadowing.)

A few weeks ago, I thought it would be fun to host a Bridesmaids watch party.

So, that is exactly what I did. I carefully made cream cheese mints from flower molds, scrounged up my Serva-Snack trays and grabbed a can of mixed nuts and a copy of Bridesmaids at Target. Then, I waited for 11 other lucky ladies (or were they lucky?? Stay tuned..... Earworm yourself some Twilight Zone music while you are at it.)

I was so excited that everyone had as much fun as I did digging out their cheesy wedding stuff, bringing pictures and wedding albums, sharing stories. Seriously, WHAT IS IT about wedding fashion? It never, ever, ever stays in style. For example, my sister Maureen just had a gorgeous wedding in September - truly, it was very tasteful and classy. Pulling out my very best Olathe Used Car Salesman here, I can GUARAAAAA-NTEE that she will have something to poke fun at in 5 years time (my father decked out in a Frasier clan tartan kilt with a bone-handled knife stuck in his knee high socks notwithstanding. Of course.)

Anyway! Not only did a few ladies bring their wedding dresses, but a few brought bridesmaids dresses and other sundry marital accoutrements.

My friend Christy came wearing her nuptial hat. She's hardcore like that. We love her anyway.

Average Jane's vintage wedding dress is the one on the right - it was originally her mother's dress from 1965. All of us Font Freaks swooned over the original Jones Store logo on the garment bag.

Now, let us examine ye olde table of Cherished Wedding Clutter:

How precious, right? RIGHT.

Hey. Wait a goddamned second. What is a DOLL doing in there??

Gentle Reader, meet Elizabeth. She is my Single Girl Freakout Doll. In my late 20s, I had my heart smashed to bits then summarily handed back to me along with my CDs and VHS tapes. In the ensuing insanity, I managed to convince myself that I would never get married...... that no one would ever LOVE me in the manner to which I was accustomed...... and that menopause was lurking at my front door much like Jack Nicholson from The Shining.

Heeeeeere's Elizabeth!

Come out, come out, where ever you are.

Yes, in a fit of desperation, I ordered this DOLL from one of those Fancy Pants DOLL Places with the perfectly reasonable explanation (in my Real Life-Like HEAD) that since I would never get to buy myself a wedding dress, I could buy my goddamned DOLL a wedding dress.

It made perfect sense at the time.

Obviously, you know how this story ends. I found the guy, we got hitched and I now live a life of grand, sumptuous luxury in the Soul-Sucking Suburban Prairie of Olathe. KANSAS. You would think after all that Freaking Out that I would have taken my Honest-to-Goodness, Real Life-Like Wedding more seriously. Yet, that did not happen. We got engaged in May 2002, picked a venue in the fall of 2002 and signed up a priest in New Hampshire. And then?? I did NOTHING. Finally, in April, a few of the guests, including but not limited to Average Jane and the aforementioned Hardcore Hat Christy, began hinting around as to whether they were going to get food or not. At this wedding of mine for which they had paid Real Life-Like money for airline tickets. For a wedding that was to happen in 2 months. Oh, right. THAT. So, I picked up the phone and ordered food, a cake, flowers and somewhere in there, made a hair appointment. I tried on a few dresses and picked one that I liked, but did not love (seriously, my kingdom for a goddamned dress with SLEEVES.)

However, I did hunt high and low for the wedding handbag and the cake topper. I researched endless online sites for a much-desired Lladro cake topper and trolled through store after store after store.

For a cake topper. Because I had priorities. Obviously.

Apparently, I also harbored secret desires for a Silver Fox. And that ain't Lladro, either.

Anyway! Friday's party was so much fun. Then, we had Saturday -- which was low-key. We had some birthday stuff for Arun that day, dinner consisted of some chicken burritos that Manoj picked up at the nearby panadería and then we went to bed. (The ominous foreshadowing just got more ominous. Crank up the music! J.S Bach be in the house, yo.)

At 2am, I found myself making sweet love to my toilet .....caressing its smooth, porcelain curves.....whispering sweet nothings in its ear.... swearing that American Standard would never tear us asunder.

Food poisoning, right? Nope. Turns out, others from my Bridesmaid party also picked up a Bridesmaid Bug. Oh, the sweet irony. If you haven't seen the Bridesmaids party here......is......your ......

SPOILER ALERT!

$#@%* ZOMFG

Yes, FOUR of us from my Bridesmaid party had a fun reenactment of the Groundbreaking, Historic Brazilian Food Poisoning scene from the movie.

A scene that I actually mocked in the invitation to my party.

Review and Giveaway: Shutterfly Holiday Cards!

2011-10-25T17:46:00.003-05:00

My Pretend Lawyer Made Me Write This: This is not a sponsored post. Shutterfly gave me 50 free holiday cards for review and additionally, 3 promotional codes for 25 free cards to give away to my readers. However, I did purchase additional prints with my own money to further test and review the entire process since I am a new Shutterfly user (the auditor in me insisted on completing a "real" payment process.) All opinions expressed are my own.

Updated 11/16/11
The Winners!
Leah, Jendo89 and AliMomof3! Congratulations! I've sent your promo codes for 25 free 5x7 photo cards. Let me know if you have questions or issues on checkout.

*****
A few months ago, the service I used for printing photos and my holiday cards closed shop. Forever. I had used this service for a long, LONG time and when I got the news they were closing shop, I did not relish the thought of finding a new site to use for my holiday cards.

Here's the thing -- I am pretty serious about Christmas cards. I love, LOVE doing Christmas cards, even way back in the day when I would just grab a box of cards at Target...... back in the day before photo cards were the "cool thing" to do. Even now, with photo cards, I still look forward to the process of sitting down with a cup of a hot tea (or wine, if it's a Friday. Ahem.), grabbing a fresh Sharpie, settling down into my chair and getting to the task of hand-addressing each envelope. Additionally, I always keep a stack of holiday stationary nearby for jotting quick notes to those recipients that I may not have seen in awhile. I always try to order my cards around Thanksgiving so that would leave me a few weeks to get the cards out in time.

My old service shutting down left me in a lurch until Shutterfly sent me a request to review their Holiday Cards. Which I had to carefully consider and ponder, of course.

For all of 2 seconds.

When I went to check out the selection of cards, I was little overwhelmed at first. For example, I went to look at their Christmas Cards and I was greeted with 928 choices. Gulp. Fortunately, I could narrow those down by size, number of photos per card, color schemes, format (flat vs. folded), themes (i.e. "Religious") and categories (i.e. "Whimsy" or "Merry & Bright"). And that helped. A bit. So.... I clicked around some more in their other lines.

The first that caught my eye was the My Favorite Things card in their Holiday Story Cards line:

However, I fear that I am too sarcastic for something like that and I would prefer my grandmothers not leave coal in my stocking. After all, a few of my favorite things include proper male aim at the toilet, an 8pm Sharp bedtime (for the kids), a slightly warm bottle of Boulevard Amber Ale and a freshly recorded episode of Breaking Bad. All of which are inexplicably related. Indeed.

I also considered this card from the Holiday Cards line:

I liked this card because it reminded me of Kerala - the tropical area of India from where my husband is from. He did not grow up with pine trees like I did - instead, he grew up with coconut trees.

I eventually decided on two other designs and made cards with each design (because seriously, that is how easy it was that I could make TWO cards in no time flat.) I'm waiting for my husband to approve one or the other. So, which one did I decide on?? It's supposed to be a surprise, right? Right.

In the meantime, I did order and pay for prints from Shutterfly because I wanted to see their ordering process from end-to-end (yes, I am a former auditor. Why do you ask??)

Overall, what did I like about my experience with Shutterfly?
1. It was very, very easy to download/organize albums and the download speeds were quite good. The user experience was pretty much exactly what I would expect from an online photo service. No surprises! Also, I appreciate that my photos are hanging out there, just waiting to be turned into a cool photo gift or photo book.

2. I liked that on the prints I ordered (Disclosure: and paid for with my own money), I could designate text to be printed on the back. I don't remember that being an option from my previous service and I appreciated that Shutterfly offered it.

3. I noticed for the Christmas cards they have two really cool options. One of them includes pre-addressing the envelopes for you (I believe the pricing was 25 cents per card) and another option included even directly sending some of the cards (or if you choose, all of the cards). Those aren't options that I want or need right now, but they are certainly something to consider if you are a small business owner or someone with a really busy schedule.

Giveaway Time!
Shutterfly has given me promotional codes for 25 free holiday cards to give away to THREE readers (excludes shipping and taxes, valid only in the US). I am opening up anonymous commenting for this and the rules for this giveaway are simple:

Leave a comment on this post by Midnight, CDT Friday, November 4th, 2011 and I will choose three winners using Random.org. That's it! Please include an email address if you're not a regular commenter so that I may contact you if you win.

And more!
Shutterfly would also like to reach out to other bloggers! Are you a blogger? Want a chance at 25 free cards this holiday season? Register here.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Pulling your leg.

2011-10-21T11:09:00.000-05:00

2010

What is it about a turkey leg that makes it so damned delicious??? It's certainly a step up from traditional fair food. I suppose there is a particular primal satisfaction to be gained from ripping through tendons, ligaments and whatnot with your bare teeth in order to get to that lovely pink meat.

Does your city have a RenFest? Does it also serve up the roasted turkey leg? Also, have you discovered new Food Loves after a lifetime of previously hating them?

Lost for Words

2011-10-16T11:35:00.001-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Division Bell 1994

On Arun's 1st birthday, I wrote this on his First Status Report:

I wanted to be a mother for a long, long time and he is everything I could have ever hoped for in a child. And more. He's so much more than I dreamed of that it takes my breath way. To have all of one's dreams and fears encapsulated in one tiny, beautiful human being is equally daunting and awe-inspiring. And I wouldn't change a thing.

And nothing has changed.

Well, that's not entirely true. This boy has progressed a bit. We have even installed some hardware updates.

However, the software updates are all his own doing.

Overall, we are quite satisfied with our First DNA Project v6.

I am still in awe of the fact that someone in charge decided that I would get to be this boy's mother. In fact, I am still waiting for the product recall.

Happy birthday, Arun. You are so sweet, kind, generous and thoughtful. No worries, baby boy. I won't tell a soul. After all, I wouldn't want to ruin your street cred.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: When restaurants serve more than just food.

2011-10-14T10:30:00.000-05:00

This leads me to wonder -- what other restaurants do I go to for the entertainment value, rather than the food?? Immediately, I thought of two: The Top of the World restaurant in the Stratosphere in Las Vegas and the T-Rex restaurant.

I love, love The Top of the World restaurant. It is situated 884 feet in the air, sits on the north end of Las Vegas Boulevard and revolves (I seem to remember it completes a revolution every 45 minutes) The views are stunning and I always try to get our reservations just before the sun is setting. Watching the sun set behind Red Rock Canyon while the Boulevard comes to life to the south and Fremont Street to the north cranks on their lights never ceases to amaze me. Don't get me wrong -- the food is actually very good, but it is extremely expensive for what you get. Truly, you are paying for that gorgeous view.

The T-Rex restaurant is another one that grabs me by the pocketbook. Holy Zeus! Their food is outrageously priced and frankly, just plain sucks. However, the view of my kids' bright, gemstone eyes?

Yeah, you know the rest.

What say you, Gentle Reader? Any restaurants that lure you in using bait other than food?

Hey you

2011-10-12T09:45:00.002-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Wall 1979

I never quite know what to say when I have taken a little bloggie vacation. That I was too damned busy to post? That I was in a blogging rut? That things have been so boring there is nothing to write about? Lies, all of them. The truth is rather mundane.

I did not feel like posting.

Oh sure, I have been busy, but not any busier than anyone else and certainly not too busy to post. And we are not bored -- just enjoying the gorgeous weather, reading books, enjoying the return of television (Hands down, Showtime's Homeland is my very favorite of the new shows this season.) October, for us, is busier than the Christmas season. With Arun's birthday and all of the Halloween and Fall festivities that we like to partake in, every weekend quickly gets booked.

In a good way.

So, I'm going to use the rest of this post for some housekeeping and tying of loose ends. I have a more topical post coming tomorrow.........

1. Can Mishri and frequent commenter Olivia both email me, please? I have a question of each of you and I have no contact info for you! I am cagey333 on gmail. Thanks!

2. Awhile back, Jodifur posted a wedding Shoe Friday edition which featured shoes from my sister Maureen's wedding.

3. A few weekend's ago, we had a photo session with my friend Dee of Dee Perrin Photography. We met at the Ernie Miller Nature center and walked around a bit. Arun was in a spectacularly crabby mood and Anjali refused to let me style her hair, in addition to DRESSING HERSELF. Sigh. Dee managed to make some lemonade at the situation and I was so happy with the results. My favorite shot is the very last one in the series -- the one of them sitting on the wall with their notebooks. I brought the notebooks because I wanted to capture that particular image of them -- notebooks, paper and pens are an important part of our lives. They are constantly drawing and writing -- in the car, in the house and even out and about.

4. Anjali began Pre-K and I neglected to post about it. Bad mommyblogger! Bad!

I was worried about sending her off to Pre-K -- she is a July Birthday, which makes her one of the youngest and she had already been struggling emotionally and socially in her Preschool Class. However, knowledge and skill-wise, she was ready for Pre-K and after consulting with her teachers and my own Teacher Friend LuAnn, we decided not to hold Anjali back. And wow, am I glad for that decision. She LOVES Pre-K, has already made several new friends and happily skips off to school every day. Furthermore, she has latched onto Arun's Kindergarten homework and now, has nearly as many sight words as he does (score one for Competition With One's Brother!)

Yes, Pre-K was the right decision.

5. Speaking of Arun....This is the view out of my windshield every morning at drop-off:

He RUNS into the school and we have had more than one Extremely Stern Lecture about him opening his door to jump out BEFORE I have even stopped the goddamned car. Can you say "heart attack", kiddos?

Yes, he LOVES Kindergarten and doesn't appear to have any issues (we have conferences next week - hopefully there will be no surprises!) His bright, excited attitude makes me so happy and proud. Still, I miss him - he's gone every single afternoon now. And next year, will gone every single day. I haven't known how to wrap my head or heart around that, much less how to write about it here.

And so, I won't even try.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Here's a Barbie even a feminist could love.

2011-10-07T09:13:00.000-05:00

The American Royal Barbecue is the opening event of the American Royal and the season finale for the competitive circuit. Spreading over 20 acres in Kansas City’s historic Stockyards District, and with nearly 500 teams competing in four meat categories, The Royal is the largest barbecue contest in the world. Combine this with a barbecue-related trade expo, this four-day food festival is truly the “World Series of Barbecue.”

The scene was crazy. And huge - the equivalent of 10 football fields. And smoky - besides the food part, apparently celebrating The Cigar was in order. I didn't mind, though - I LOVE the smell of a good cigar. And cheap, canned beer flowed like champagne.

Or something like that.

It was also the scene of many, many questionable fashion choices.

Run, pig, RUN.

A fiber-optic mohawk that actually twinkled like a Christmas tree.

And punk rockers everywhere weeped in shame.

Fortunately, the food more than made up for it.

Although, I do believe this qualifies as a complete Food Photography Fail. I never did figure out how to get good shots in that dimly lit, smoky tent. And then I got hungry which signaled the end of our photography session (obviously, the very best part of food photography is eating your subject.) Speaking of shots, I had a Nickler shot with some fancy-pants vodka that was so pure, it tasted like water. Which was sorta of scary so I limited myself to just ONE shot, lest the evening unravel into something that I couldn't blog about, much less REMEMBER.

Now, that's a fire!

That behemoth saw a lot of pork butt over the weekend.

Moaning Myrtle meets Simon Majumdar

That's some stellar Double Chin Action there, Kelli. Also, would it kill you to use a blush brush just once? Anyway! Simon is a British author, Iron Chef judge and food blogger extraordinaire at Dos Hermanos. He is buddies with one of the Burn Rate fellows and loves coming to the American Royal BBQ (which was featured in his book Eat My Globe (extract of that article is here). We also found out that Simon is a desi via Calcutta , which always increases one's street cred in my book. Y'all know how I love me some Indians.

Iconic.

I used to work at the Livestock Exchange building down in the stockyards. This smoky, ethereal installation never ceased to inspire me. Simple, beautiful and wholly representative.

Man, I love Kansas City.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: What's yours, is mine. And vice versa.

2011-09-30T11:54:00.004-05:00

If you take the list of ingredients (say for egg and olive salad) and write up, in your own words, how to make it, then, by law, you have an original recipe.

..... your list of ingredients cannot be copyrighted. The directions and other information can. Practically speaking, this allows every food writer in the world to publish traditional recipes, home cooking favorites and simple recipes.

Oh, and all of those Pioneer Woman Haters will now have to find new reasons for their venom since it is obvious she is not breaking any laws. You can now sleep at night, Ree. You're welcome.

I have always felt that I should refer to the cookbook author from whom I have gotten recipes. At a minimum, it is the polite thing to do, no? However, this clarification makes me feel better that I am not breaking any sort of law. Furthermore, I have two cookbooks in particular where I HATE their method of writing instructions For example, my recipes for Pad Prik Kai (Thai Chicken in Red Chili Sauce) and Kai Kratium (Thai Garlic Pepper Chicken) came from these cookbooks. The original instructions were simply awful, but the end product is awesome and a part of my regular rotation for meals. I got tired of digging through confusing steps and re-wrote their recipes for simplicity, for my own use. And then I shared them with you, Gentle Reader

Because I love you like that.

Today, I am sharing a pumpkin erisheri recipe that was inspired by Maya Kaimal's Savoring the Spice Coast of India: Fresh Flavors from Kerala. I've changed the instructions and fiddled with a few ingredients. Namely, I substituted pinto beans for the mung beans - I just didn't feel all the work involved resulted in much difference in taste or texture. And Manoj agreed.

Anyway! This is essentially a pumpkin curry and I love that this is a recipe from my husband's state of Kerala in India. This is a dish that his own mother would have cooked and it makes me happy that my own kids will have cozy memories of this dish from their own childhood. My mother-in-law died when Manoj and I had only been dating for a few months. I never got to meet her and it still makes me sad that my children will never know her.

Pumpkin Erisheri

Ingredients:
15 oz can of pinto beans, rinsed and drained
4 cups of fresh pumpkin cut into 3/4 inch cubes
1/4 cup grated unsweeetened coconut
1/4 tsp turmeric
1/4 tsp cayenne
1 and 1/4 tsp salt
2 tbs vegetable oil
1 tsp mustard seeds
2 dried red chilies

Coconut Paste:
3/4 cup of grated, unsweetened coconut

1 tbs chopped garlic

1 tsp cumin

1/2 tsp cayenne
1/4 tsp turmeric

Preparation:
1. For the coconut paste, place ingredients in a blender or food processor. Add 1/2 cup water or more and blend to the consistency of thick pesto. Set aside.

2. In a wide deep pan place the pumpkin, turmeric, cayenne, salt, and 1 and 1/2 cups water. Bring to a boil, reduce the heat, and simmer, covered for 10 minutes.

3.Add the pinto beans. Continue cooking until the pumpkin is tender and a fork easily slides through (10-15 minutes.)

4. Add the coconut paste and stir to combine. Bring to a boil, then remove from the heat.

5. In a frying pan, heat the vegetable oil over medium-high heat. Add the mustard seeds and cover. When the mustard seeds begin to pop, toss in the dried red chilies and fry for a few seconds. Add the remaining 1/4 cup of coconut and stir constantly over medium-high heat until the coconut turns cinnamon brown and no white remains. Stir this into the cooked pumpkin and beans and heat the mixture until warmed through (add more water if it begins to dry out.)

6. Remove from the heat and check the salt. The curry should appear as chunks of pumpkin with a thick sauce. Serve with white rice.

Note: This recipe can also be made with sweet potato and butternut squash. I like to mix the two because with the sweet potato, otherwise it is a little too sweet.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: What's the plan, Stan?

2011-09-23T11:13:00.000-05:00

I have a hoard of cookbooks, but these are the ones I use most frequently, so I keep them handy and easily accessible. I used to have them on the countertop but I prefer them tucked away since it protects them from dust, grease, etc.

My Favorite Cookbooks List

Curried Favors: Family Recipes from South India by Maya Kaimal

Simply Thai Cooking by Wandee Young and Byron Ayanoglu

Simply Mediterranean Cooking by Byron Ayanoglu and Algis Kemezys

Mexican Everyday by Rick Bayless

The Asian Bistro Cookbook by Andrew Chase

Savoring the Spice Coast of India: Fresh Flavors from Kerala by Maya Kaimal

Awhile back, I had mentioned that Paper Coterie was giving away $40 worth of product. I spent $17 of my alottment on this handy recipe book:

Full Disclosure: This post is NOT sponsored. I simply received the recipe book for free.

And I LOVE IT.

It took several hours worth of work digging through emails, bookmarked links, past blog posts, etc. Recipes that had all been printed out previously and existed in a chaotic mess inside a red folder. But it was worth the work and now, I have some of my favorite recipes in a single book. In MY book.

I love how many of the recipes have come from friends - old and new. It was quite a trip down memory lane.

I also love that I was able to use some of my favorite food photos as well.

I will always have a folder full of printouts and whatnot, that is the most exciting part of cooking as a hobby -- that constant discovery of new recipes and fresh ways to use one's favorite ingredients.

What are your favorite meal planning tips? I am always looking for new ideas on how I can improve my schedule.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: If It Ain't Fried, Then It Died.

2011-09-16T15:09:00.000-05:00

My dad has been eating Grange Pups since 1947 and he is quite proud of this.

While perusing fresh-squeezed limeade options, I saw that a stand was serving deep-fried Twinkies. I had never eaten one before and thought that in the interest of Intestinal Fortitude, I should try one at least once.

Oh my......It was amazing. A greasy, delicious hunk of melted sponge cake, cream filling and goddamned magic.

The food stand was ran by a church. So technically, I ate that thing FOR JESUS.

And for you, Gentle Reader.

Let us never speak of this again.

What is your favorite Fair Food?

Paint Box

2011-09-14T10:05:00.001-05:00

Pink Floyd, Relics 1973

I have mentioned in a long ago post, Love, American Style, that my Indian is a Special one (and he's mine, can you believe it?) He is a Syrian Christian Malayalee, born and raised all over the state of Kerala. He came to America to build a new life and has worked his ass off toward that goal. And unapologetically so. He is not particularly sentimental about his heritage -- after all, he IS Indian, there is nothing that can really be changed about that and there is certainly nothing to be proved.

We are both adamant that our children are 100% American and in Any Colour You Like, I wrote about we also actively discuss skin color (I have found that for some folks that is Too Much Talk, for others, that is Not Enough Talk. Unlike Charlie Sheen, I NEVER WIN.) For all the cynicism and politically driven separations currently in our country, we do love living here and fully intend for this to our home. And in that sweet, precious idea of what it means to be American, there is a place for my husband. He can be both Indian and he can be American (someday!)

With Manoj having a Catholic background, I struggle with the figuring out what to celebrate culturally in light of what is archetypically "Indian". Diwali holds few emotions for him. The same goes for Holi. Those are Hindu festivals and while he did join in the celebrations as a kid with his friends, they were not something that his family actively celebrated. Once, he mentioned that what he loved most about Diwali and Holi was that he got out of school for the day (which leads me to ponder if this is not how Jewish folks feel about Christmas in America.)

However, in Kerala, there is festival in the fall that is uniquely Keralite and seems to transcends religion. It is called Onam and it celebrates the harvest.

While I doubt that we will be hosting snakeboat races in the backwaters of our jacuzzi tub, parading elephants on our sidewalk, or busting some kathakali moves in our living room, it did seem that even this here White Girl could muster up the skills needed in order to create a pookalam. A pookalam is essentially a carpet of flowers that you arrange in front of your house. Frankly, I had no idea what I was doing.

Gentle Reader, has that stopped me yet? .

First, I drew an awkward, lopsided decoration with sidewalk chalk.

Emphasis on the "lopsided".

Then, I bought a dozen roses from the grocery store and pilfered a flower arrangement left over from my sister Maureen's wedding.

In Grand White Trash Tradition that would make my daddy proud, I realized as I was posting this snap that Arun was NOT WEARING UNDERWEAR in this photo. A quick photocrop later and the authorities were thwarted. Yet again.

We laid out the flower petals according to the design.

Unfortunately, we ran out of flowers. The nearby Rose of Sharon was quickly relieved of some leaves and flowers. Fortunately, it did not complain.

Overall, it was so much fun doing this with this Arun and Anjali. Next year, we will buy far more flowers, but we will definitely still include the Rose of Sharon. I loved that we used flowers from our own yard.

As we worked on the pookalam, Arun excitedly exclaimed, "I'm half-Indian today!" And I told him, "You're half-Indian every day. But you are 100% American. You can be BOTH. Isn't that cool?"

His beaming smile said it all.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Cheese, Glorious CHEESE.

2011-09-09T08:20:00.002-05:00

We simply love CHEESE. Before we had kids, one of our favorite quickie meals when we would get together would be a plate of fruit and cheese. In fact, one of my favorite meals at the Freestate Brewery in Lawrence, KS is their fruit and cheese plate. Then, we had kids and for some reason, children require actual meals rather than scraps of fermented milk and bits of fruit.

Jerks.

And fruit. I loved this shot of picture-perfect Alaina eating a messy cherry with juice dribbling on her fancy dress. Also, that gorgeous bouffant? Screamed for a 1960s Picnik effect.

Since Jill and I raised our daughters RIGHT, they love cheese, too. Lactose intolerant kids need not apply for membership in our family.

Move along, kiddo. You'll need to find another family to support you and your lame-ass digestive system.

Cheese? Is serious business, folks.

Literally Literary: Henna For the Heartbroken and a Killer Library Room

2011-09-08T09:34:00.002-05:00

I have decided to write separate posts regarding books and I am calling this feature "Literally Literary". Why am I going to such bother? My hope is the post title will provide a subtle hint that I am posting about BOOKS. For those of you where the topic of books results in narcoleptic fits thereby causing you to faceplant onto your keyboard, this will allow you to just click away from the horror that is the written word. Also, I simply adore the word "literally", it is literally my favorite adverb. Bonus points if pronounced with a Rob Lowe/Parks n' Recreation affectation.

Special Note: All posts contain non-affiliate links - I do not have an Amazonian Fancy Pants Affiliate Thingie.
*******

Yesterday, I began reading author Sharell Cook's Henna for the Broken-Hearted (I bought my copy through Amazon, Sharell offers other options here - with it being a non-US publication, it's a little dicey to get a hard copy right now) Sharell, who writes the blog Diary of a White Indian Housewife, currently lives in Mumbai with her Indian husband. However, Sharell is from Australia and Henna for the Broken-Hearted is the story of how she ended up in India. We both belong to a few Pardesi groups that I affectionately refer to as my groups for "Brown Boys and the White Girls Who Love Them". For me, reading Sharell's account of how she came to settle in India is fascinating. And I thought it worth mentioning here.

As I've mentioned, this is Wedding Week at Rancid Raves (See Also: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3). My sister Maureen's wedding was SO much fun, that I knew a single post wouldn't capture it all. The wedding and reception was held at Williams House in Lawrence, Kansas. The house was simply gorgeous and held so much beauty, interest and charm. Also, the entire house was full of books - stacks of books adorned every table, dresser. Piles of books were in every room. I could have spent hours just sifting through the titles.

In particular, I fell in love with the library room:

My pictures do not do this room justice.

However, these shots will simply have to suffice when I build my Dream House and I hand these snaps over the architect so that he or she can recreate the entire damned thing.

Including the corner step-ladder, which will be a requirement in the Library Room of My Dreams.

Sniff.

Love Scene (Version 6)

2011-09-07T09:22:00.001-05:00

Pink Floyd, Zabriskie Point (Extended 1997 Release)

It's Wedding Week here at Rancid Raves! (Part 1 is here)

By the end of the day, Arun had collected a snail, more than one caterpillar and a myriad of leaves, pods and seeds. Thank the little baby Zeus for Oxyclean.

I just loved this shot of my dad dancing with Anjali and Alaina. I know some folks get snarky and nasty with the entire "wearing a kilt" thing, but my dad did the research into our family to get the appropriate tartan. He loves wearing the kilt and feels completely comfortable doing so.

Furthermore, he looks quite handsome.

All the naysayers can bite me.

Double-fisting the drink. We were so proud.

We did get the long-awaited cousin shot that my dad has spent years asking for.. This was the best snap of the bunch.

Better luck next wedding? Sigh.

Nobody got tagged the entire day by the tire swing. Folks, that is what you call a goddamned miracle.

Love Scene (Version 4)

2011-09-06T09:38:00.002-05:00

Pink Floyd, Zabriskie Point (Extended 1997 Release)

Welcome to Wedding Week at Rancid Raves....

My sister Maureen got married this past weekend.

It was such a lovely, fun wedding full of laughter, tears, wine, music and rain.

Let me rephrase that - it was such a lovely, fun OUTDOOR wedding full of laughter, tears, wine, music and rain.

RAIN.

Team Chaos was stylin' and profilin'. When Arun tried on his tux for the first time, he exclaimed, "I look like a DAD!!!!!!"

The wedding was held at the Williams House in Lawrence KS. A gorgeous location.

It started to pour rain just as Maureen and my dad started to walk down the path. The entire ceremony was conducted in the rain. However, we Oliver Sisters just don't sweat weddings and Maureen had such a sweet, positive attitude. She didn't let it ruin her day, that's for sure. And the reception was mostly under a tent. Which helped.

As did the Oliver wine.

Arun got to spend an entire day with his favorite cousin Brendan. An ENTIRE DAY. He was on Cloud 9, folks.

A lobbyist wearing a pin-striped seersucker apparently did a Marty McFly from 1850 Louisiana in order to join us present-day Seriously, LOVE THE SUIT.

The mad scientist from Jurassic Park took a break from wrangling dinosaurs to join us. The guy in the kilt double-fisting drinks? None other than MY DAD. Clan Frasier, represent! And yes, there is a bone-handled knife tucked into his sock. In case we are attacked by a roving band of wild-turkeys. Or Democrats..

Lookin' good, Mr. Kotter!

Anjali has obsessed about this wedding the entire year. The cake had purple flowers, per her "instructions" but there was no ice sculpture as she had so hoped there would be.

Alaina and Anjali gained a new cousin-in-law this weekend. We gained a new brother-in-law (a brother-in-law who dated Maureen long enough to know what it means to be marrying an Oliver. No excuses, Brian.)

And we couldn't be happier.

Congratulations, Maureen and Brian. May your basement always be filled with potatoes.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: 'Til Death Do Us Part

2011-09-02T11:10:00.000-05:00

Because it WAS hilarious. If the worst thing to happen at my wedding would be my cake falling over, then I consider that to be a grand success.

And let's not talk about the massive amounts of champagne I consumed after the cake. Because that wasn't pretty. Particularly, hiking in the Flume Gorge the next day with a Champagne Headache FROM HELL.

Welcome to your new life, you lush.

What about you?
Do you like your wedding cake traditional white or do you prefer Fancy Pants Flavors?

Marooned

2011-08-30T12:07:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Division Bell 1994

First and foremost! Until Midnight, August 31st, Paper Coterie is giving away $40 worth of product (excludes shipping). Seriously -- anything you want -- photo books, personalized journals, memory keepers, personalized cookbooks. $40 worth of it is yours. At the end of this post on my review site, Queen of the Free Bees, you can find the details. There is no catch. All you have to do is simply create an account on their site and get busy choosing which product you want. Details are at the end of this post - see what I did just there!! I am not making you read the whole thing - just go to the end.

Moving on!

Um, today's post title is adequate. Quite simply, I feel marooned. With Arun in school every afternoon now, there is not quite enough time to do anything meaningful, such as go into Kansas City or to the zoo or anything like that. Instead, I meander around my Soul-Sucking Suburb and thus, fill my days. Arun is quite happy scampering off to school ever day after lunch. Me? I am still feeling a sharp sense of loss.

Fortunately for me, my Soul-Sucking Suburb has a wickedly awesome pet shop that offers some distraction from the shrill keening and general rending of garments. A pet shop that just happened to be selling a Rosehair tarantula spiderling (sling). The same sling I have had my eye on for well over a month. We went into the pet shop on Saturday and I discovered the sling had just molted.

Gentle Reader, it is difficult to resist a tarantula sporting a new set of threads.

And so we brought her home.

Yes, Arun has been handling her. Rosehairs are the gentle giants of the tarantula set. Which is precisely why I got her - I wanted something that we could handle for a change. Pinktoe tarantulas are skittish things and therefore, I simply don't handle Daniel much. And I would never let Arun handle him. The downside to Rosehairs is that they sometimes kick off uricating hairs. Which itch. Like hell.

A few months back, I was explaining to my friend Celeste (aka Average Jane) that I choose my T names from the Social Security Admin Top 10 baby names. I am careful in choosing the names for my Ts and try not to choose names of anyone's children. Celeste laughed and said that she would be fine with me naming my next tarantula after her.

Alrighty, then.

Therefore, I decided to name our newest tarantula Little Celeste (because she is littler than Human Celeste. Obviously). Arun calls her Brown Celeste (because he's racist. Obviously.) Anjali calls her Aunt Celeste (because she's confused. Obviously.)

She's slightly larger than my quarter. She will likely grow larger than my hand.

Little Celeste is settled into her home, usually nestled under her piece of cork. Here, she ventured along the sides of her cage to greet Daniel.

Daniel says "What? No fucking ziti?".

To make up for the plethora of Spider Snaps, may I offer you some Simian Snaps as way of an apology???

All that tarantula wrangling wore him out. And yes, he snuggles with Bowser most nights.

Other nights, he snuggles with his sister, too.

Not every night, though.

The boy has a reputation to uphold, after all.

Party Sequence

2011-08-25T10:24:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Final Cut 1983

Finally, my recap of BlogHer11. But first, I would like offer up my Annual Obligatory Clarification of BlogHer's Attendance Policy:

BlogHer is a conference for everybody.

This is not an exclusive conference and it is open to the public. Seriously! Anyone can buy a conference pass. After all, they've let ME in year after year, so that you should tell you something about the inclusive nature of BlogHer. Furthermore, BlogHer has perfected the party process - every single night there are plenty of open party options to attend. In fact, I only attended ONE private party - all the rest were BlogHer-sponsored parties open to all conference attendees.

In short, YOU should come to next year's BlogHer. Get cracking on that BlogHer 12 registration, folks.

In 2005, BlogHer consisted of 300 people. We crammed into a small conference center in Santa Clara, CA. We were given 2 drink tickets for a small cocktail hour after the first day's sessions. There were no parties. Dinners consisted of haphazard plans based upon whomever you happened to have ran into just before heading out. Our "swag" consisted of a notebook, pen and bag. I was 7 months pregnant with Arun and I used that notebook to record all the typical newborn stuff - feedings, diaper changes, eyelashes growing. 20 months later, I recorded Anjali's newborn activities in it.

I still have that notebook.

In 2011, BlogHer consisted of over 4000 people. We were spread out over a HUGE convention center.

Sometimes, bigger IS better.

So......

The Roommates
I roomed mostly with Liz Rizzo of Everyday Goddess and Celeste aka Average Jane. Saturday night, Siel of green LA girl didn't want to drive back to LA, so she roomed with us.

Honestly? Having roommates could be stressful, except that for me, it easily becomes the best part of the trip. Having so many roommates is like having an extra set of eyes and ears at all times. Not in a gossipy way, but in a fun, Trixie Belden way - a roommate can be a valuable source of information! Also, I love the Spring Break Feeling, I appreciate meeting back in the room and hearing about all the cool things and people that my roomies may have ran into that I might have missed. And truly, I love seeing all the goodies that folks have gotten and am geniunely happy for my roommates when they score big. Liz was the Big Winning Roommate this BlogHer - she came away with an iPad, a spa gift basket and a HUGE basket of Lindt chocolate. (Celeste also won a basket of chocolate which worked out spectacularly for me since we were flying back to Kansas City together. Yeah, baby!)

One of my favorite Roommate Stories happened Sunday morning. I was saying something to Liz about Manoj, when all of a sudden Liz said "I thought your husband was Native American!". I can only imagine how confused Liz was the entire weekend, what with me talking about my "Indian husband" and who knows what else came out weird over the weekend!

Also, my roommmates didn't mind at all if my nose was stuck in my phone while talking to them. I wonder why?

The Venue:
BlogHer was held at the San Diego Convention Center. The venue was GORGEOUS and the staff was amazing. While it was a crapton of walking, I didn't mind the walking part. Although, that did make it a wee bit stressful in that you really had to be careful with time - it could easily take 20 minutes to make a "quick" trip to your room.

Speaking of the room, the view from it consisted of this:

And this......

And this!

While I am excited to be back in New York City for BlogHer 12, I am going to really, really going to miss those views.

The Parties
I mostly went to to open BlogHer Parties. Liz did score me a +1 invite to one of the private parties she was invited to and I was so appreciative. It was held at the beach at the Del Coronado and sitting oceanside by a fire pit listening to live music was so relaxing. I didn't even mind the chilly temps.

My two favorite BlogHer parties this year were the Queerosphere (I haven't been to a drag show in forever, so that was a special treat!) and the Social Fiesta. I was a little hesitant about the Social Fiesta because um, in case you hadn't noticed, I am not Latina. However, but it didn't matter - it was a warm, inviting atmosphere and so much fun. Hands down, it was my favorite party with my favorite food and favorite dance music and favorite atmosphere.

The Celebrities
After the Voices of the Year cocktail hour, I met The Roommates at the poolside bar. I noticed there was quite the crowd around them and then discovered that we had inadvertently become the line wranglers for Ricki Lake:

I can report that Ricki Lake was SO sweet, warm and genuine. I only spoke to her for the briefest of milliseconds, but we watched her for a long time greeting people. Consistently, she was professional, polite and respectful. I was really impressed with her, quite frankly.

The other "celebrity" I encountered? Came out of the blue. I was on the dance floor at the CheeseburgHer party and I introduced myself to the gal dancing beside me by beginning one of those Loud Dance Floor Conversations.

Kelli(!!!!!!): Hi! I"m Kelli! And your name is?
The "Celebrity": Laurie.
Kelli (!!!???): Oh. You look familiar! What's your site?
The "Celebrity": I don't have a site. Do you have kids?
Kelli (??????): Yes, ages 4 and 5.5.
The "Celebrity": Well, I'm Laurie from PBS Sprout. That's probably where you know me from.

At that point, I start laughing hysterically which, Gentle Reader, did NOT seem to impress Laurie The Celebrity From The PBS Sprout Morning Show. The funny part is that from some dark chamber of my deep subconscious, I probably did recognize her from PBS Sprout, but we have rarely watched her show. Ever. For one, we only got PBS Sprout for a brief while a few years back and for another, we are a Nick Jr. family and for yet another, my kids are notorious night owls - they are rarely up in time for any morning show much less the one starring Laurie The Celebrity From The PBS Sprout Morning Show.

The Sessions
I really enjoyed the sessions this year at BlogHer. Hands down, my favorite sessions were the food photography ones. The official BlogHer session was less informational and more inspirational, but I had no complaints. The Hillshire Farm session I mentioned in my last post was awesome. The Voices of the Year was excellent, per usual - my favorite post was Oh Good, You Saved Your Bullshit by Oh, Noa. Seriously - go read it!

The Swag:

My favorite overall swag bag came from Missouri Wines because it was such a fun grab bag of odds n' ends. My favorite individual pieces were the mc3 head phones and the etyBLU2 headset from Etymotic that I received at the Clever Girls Collective TechBrunch (many thanks to Celeste for snagging us spots at that!!) I also LOVE my personalized journal from Paper Coterie from the MomSelect Suite. (Full Disclosure: These links are not sponsored and I didn't have to link, but I did want to share my favorite bits of gear I came home with.)

The People
I am not going to lie - every year (except for BlogHer 05, which was like freaking Woodstock) I get dissed by someone directly to my face or it becomes obvious that the person I am talking to would rather be with someone hipper, cooler and they look over my shoulder for an escape route It happens every single year. However, since I allowed something like this to nearly ruin BlogHer 06 for me, I've chosen to not talk about it in my recap posts. And yes, this year was no exception my Poor, Sensitive Feelings. Gentle Reader, they couldn't catch a break.

I was having such a horrible time at Party-That-Must-Not-Be-Named, that I nearly left in tears. I was mortified and really hesitant at what to do. And then? A girl came up to me and said "Hi! My name is Lauren." She was not a blogger and was at the conference for business. We chatted that night and eventually, some folks I knew showed up and we all hung out together. Lauren and I ended up spending a good portion of the conference together. And that is why I choose year after year to not make a big deal in my wrapups of how hurtful other people can be. Because there is always a Lauren in the crowd somewhere. There is always someone who is not focused on Their Cool Factor and is simply there to learn. Someone who just wants to meet new people and hang out. (For example, at BlogHer 05, it was everyone in attendance, at BlogHer 06, there was a Brit and a Zoot, and ..... so on. Every BlogHer, I manage to find someone. Thank goodness!)

So, thank you, NonBloggerTypePerson Lauren for being friendly and showing me, yet again, one of my very favorite bits of BlogHer.

Meeting new people.

And also, thank you, NonBloggerTypePerson Lauren, for making my favorite CheeseburgHer McDonald's Bag Concoction to date - a hippie headband. Novel!

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: The Food Paparazzi

2011-08-19T08:36:00.004-05:00

Note: Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude is a weekly feature about food, food and more FOOD. No, I do not necessarily want to be a food blogger, but I do LOVE to talk about food prep, cooking food, eating food and making sweet love to food. Okay, maybe not the "sweet love" part. After all, this is not meant to be an homage to 9 1/2 Weeks.

***********
While at BlogHer, I attended a Food Styling and Photography workshop offered by Hillshire Farms. This post is not sponsored by them nor am I being compensated for this post by anyone else. I am writing this post simply because hands down, this was one of my absolute favorite sessions this year at BlogHer. It was interesting, engaging and believe it or not, involved a lot of laughing. Who knew that food photography could be so entertaining and fascinating??

The speakers for the session were Sara Remington (a food photographer), William Smith (a food stylist) and Helen Rosner (a web editor for Saveur.com).

The key points that resonated with me from the Food Styling portion were the following:

Don’t overcrowd the plate
• Keep it simple, only plating what is needed
• Use a serving size that is just right – not too much, not too little
• Use a bigger plate to make the plate not too crowded

Garnish the food
• Don’t overdo the garnishing
• You can also use powders to garnish, like powdered coffee, spices, or colored salt
• Garnishing almost always adds dimension to your food presentation, when kept to a minimum

Positioning
• There is talk of a virtual clock where meat (and sandwiches) is at 2 o’clock, starch at 10 and veggies at 6
Plates
• White or off-white plates make the food stand out more
Focus
• The main part of the dish, usually the meat (or sandwich) should be put most in focus (for example, a little elevated)

The following tips helped me with the Food Photography portion:

Lighting
• Treat the food you’re photographing as you would any other still life subject and ensure that it is well lit
• One of the best places to photograph food is by a window where there is plenty of natural light – perhaps
supported with flash bounced off a ceiling or wall to give more balanced lighting that cuts out the shadows.
This daylight helps to keep the food looking much more natural

Props & background
• Pay attention not only to the arrangement of the food itself but to the context that you put it in including the
plate or bowl and any table settings around it
• Don’t clutter the photo with a full table setting but consider one or two extra elements such as a glass, fork, flower or napkin. These elements can often be placed in secondary positions in the foreground or background of your shot
• Pay attention to backgrounds and clear out any elements you don’t want in the final shot

Be quick
• Food doesn’t keep its appetizing looks for long so as a photographer you’ll need to be well prepared and able to shoot quickly after it’s been cooked before it melts, collapses, wilts and/or changes color
• One strategy that some use is to have the shot completely set up with props before the food is ready and then to substitute a stand-in plate to get your exposure right. Then when the food is ready you just switch the stand-in plate with the real thing and you’re ready to start shooting

Source: A handout from the Hillshire Farms workshop.

Helen, the web editor from Saveur.com was also very helpful (there was no handout provided for this section, so I'm done with fancy, concise lists now) What I took away from Helen's presentation is this:
1) keep posts clean and to the point
2) don't include a zillion, superfluous pictures.

She actually used the Pioneer Woman as an example of how to NOT do recipe posts. In the post presented, PW had included such snaps as ladling sauces. As Helen pointed out, we all probably know how to ladle a sauce at this point. The shot was artistically pretty, but not particularly useful. Helen used a particular PW post that had over 20 pictures. No, this was not a slam on PW - she has a Following that doesn't mind if she uses 1 picture or 20. The rest of us, however, are NOT The Pioneer Women and we do not have Followings.

Oh, and at this point, I am going to completely violate the "concise" rule for posting because I am already getting too "wordy".

And I am not nearly done here, folks.

One key piece to the entire presentation?? Not once was the suggestion offered to use "non-food" ingredients (need to thicken a sauce? Use cornstarch.) Leave the wood glue and varnish in the garage, I guess.

So, after all of that? It was time for me to start playing around. I whipped up some pad prik kai (the recipe is at the end of the post) and got to work photographing. Time was of the essence because the sunlight wasn't going to last - neither was the food, for that matter.

I realized quickly that my yellowish Franciscan Appleware photographs horribly, so I pulled out a plate that was my great-grandma Courtney's (who coincidentally hails from the Land of Pioneer Woman. Bartlesville, Represent! Woot! Dewey!). Anyway! Her china is simple, white and slightly elegant without being distracting. My dining room faces the west and gets awesome natural light. I cleared out a space and started shooting.

All of these photos are SOOC (straight out of camera).
This was my favorite photo:

However, it was a little too dark. I probably could play around with it in editing, though.

I liked the presentation on this one, but the lighting still wasn't quite "there". The food is a little too dark, the rice looks washed out:

Although not my favorite photo, this photo probably represents the dish the best - all of the important elements are presented. The rice, the basil, the peppers and the chicken.

Now, I'm hungry.

Obviously, I still have a LONG way to go in learning how to photograph food and style it. And more importantly, how to work my camera! However, this workshop really helped me to evaluate how and where I can improve my shots. I don't see myself stealing jobs from under Sara's feet (as if!), but I would like to include more food photography in my posts here. I worry that I am putting out these weird, unusual recipes and by not including a snap of how the dish should look, this may be putting people off from actually attempting to cook them.

And now, it's recipe time.

*********
The following recipe was inspired by something I discovered while digging through my Simply Thai cookbook that I've had forever. I love this recipe because it uses ingredients that I almost always have on hand. This is a pretty light dish, but has great, spicy flavors with crunchy veggies that add fun texture. It originally called for pork tenderloin (which um, I have not cooked with before and never will. Ever.) and also included bamboo shoots (which I HATE). Instead, I subbed in chicken and water chestnuts (and I haven't looked back!) A red curry paste could be subbed for the chili paste/curry powder combo, as well. I prefer mixing my own because I always have those two items on hand anyway and didn't want to spend money on yet another paste. I prep everything ahead of time, then quickly throw it together as I am cooking to ensure nothing gets burned.

Pad Prik Kai
(Chicken with Red Chili Sauce)

Ingredients:
1 lb chicken breast (thinly sliced, bite-sized pieces)
1 red pepper (thin strips, 2 inches long)
5 tbsp vegetable oil
1 tbsp garlic, chopped
2 tbsp chili paste
2 tsp curry powder
1 cup water
2 tbsp fish sauce
1 tbsp sugar
1 cup sliced water chestnuts
20 basil leaves, chopped

Preparation:
1. Mix the chili sauce and curry powder into a paste.

2. Heat oil on medium high, until it is just about to smoke. Lower heat. Add the garlic and chili/curry paste. Stir-fry quickly for 45 seconds.

3. Immediately add water and raise the heat to High. Stir frequently for 1 minute and add the fish sauce and sugar. Stir fry for 2 minutes, until the sauce is bubbly.

4. Add the sliced chicken, cook for 2 minutes.

5. Add the red peppers and water chestnuts. Stir-fry for 4-5 minutes, until everything is cooked and to the texture you prefer.

6. Add 3/4 of the basil leaves and remove from the stove.

7. Garnish with the remaining basil leaves and serve with white rice.

Another Brick in the Wall

2011-08-16T14:37:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Wall 1979

I have SO many things I want to write about. About BlogHer .... about some fun gear I was given while there ..... about hanging out with my Imaginary Friends for an ENTIRE weekend ..... about the reason why I liked The Help the Book, but have no plans whatsoever to see the movie ..... about how some folks over-reacted to innocuous commentary about an effing CAKE ..... about how some other folks denigrated the entire population of Alabama in reaction to said innocuous commentary about said effing CAKE ..... about how much I LOVE the people from Alabama .......

But right now is really crazy. And I am quickly losing the patience and courage to get myself involved in sticky, thorny, emotion-laden topics. Also, while I was in San Diego playing with my Imaginary Friends, my very Real Family from San Diego was out of town themselves. In a fun twist, my Real Family is HERE in Kansas visiting and I am trying to spend as much time with them as possible. Many roadtrips to Leavenworth are involved in this goal.

Drinking Coors creekside, catching frogs and trying not to get ran over cows? Now THAT is a Kansas Family Reunion, folks.

Also, Arun started Kindergarten today.

He dutifully posed for pictures.

And of course, Anjali had to get in on the act.

OF COURSE.

He took off to school without a backward glance.

However, tears were still shed. Trust me.

Sheep

2011-08-10T13:44:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, Animals 1977

In my 20s, I read Cosmopolitan faithfully. Pictures like this should have made me realize I was just wasting my money. There was no hope. In the 80s, I would desperately try to follow every fashion trend and would look terribly ridiculous. Torn sweatshirt? I simply looked like a homeless person. Spiral perm? Left me with a burnt scalp and feeble looking waves. Blue eyeshadow? Needs no description.

I was such a sheep. I still am.

Today marks my 7th year of blogging.

Since early 2003, I had been reading Adam Bonin's blog, Throwing Things, (he later merged with a few other blogs and they became A List of 5 Things Thrown 5 Minutes Ago). The comment sections in his blog are always full of wit, deep thoughts, interesting conversation and cordial disagreement (yes, it CAN happen, folks) I mention Adam specifically because to this day, he holds a particular standard for me when it comes to blogging (not that I always meet that standard. *cough*.) Also, his site was the inspiration for the name "Rancid Raves" - it is a play on the phrase "Rants and Raves". I had originally envisioned a sort of linkblog whereby I posted things I enjoyed and didn't enjoy. Obviously, the name stuck, the concept did not. I never, ever imagined I would begin a narrative detailing the banalities of my life.

I have no regrets.

I was also inspired by two real-life, Analog Friends, Celeste and Rita. Both had began blogging earlier in the summer and when I saw they were having so much fun, I decided to join.

I went with the sheep theme because I love sheep. Cartoon sheep are so cute, sweetly fluffy and perfectly clean. Conversely? Real sheep are dirty, smelly and they have those weird, devil eyes with the creepy, elongated pupils. Yet, real sheep provide gorgeous wools that enable one of my other favorite hobbies -- knitting.

Yes, there's a metaphor in there somewhere. Maybe. Probably not.

Despite the lack of sponsorship and readership, this blog has been a supremely satisfying hobby, even if it is my most expensive hobby. What I have gained from blogging over the past 7 years cannot be quantified in terms of dollars.

Or really, anything else.

Thank you for enduring my drivel all of these years. Thank you for making my tiny site a safe place for me. Thank you for being civil in my comments section. Thank you for hugging me at past BlogHers. Thank you for meeting me in person through random meet-ups across the country. Thank you for reaching beyond blogging and becoming my friend via Twitter, Facebook and email. Thank you for sending care packages in the mail. Thank you for sending cards and gifts for my babies. Thank you for sending thoughtful, handwritten notes of support when I've lost loved ones.

Thank you for reading.

Thank you.

Heart Beat, Pig Meat

2011-08-02T09:51:00.004-05:00

Pink Floyd, Zabriskie Point 1970

I'm heading to BlogHer this week, so this will be it for posting this week because I'm too damned busy getting ready for a blogging conference to actually write on my blog. Oh, the sweet irony!

This year, I'm rooming with the venerable Average Jane and a new roomie, Liz.of Everyday Goddess. I solved the usual BlogHer Fashion Dilemma by deciding to wear what I wore last year. I've decided to call it my Official BlogHer Uniform and be done.

May I offer up a parting present?

Angry Birds? Their puny beaks are nothing in the face of the gaping maw of Daniel the Tarantula.

Death to the bastard, cloven-hooved swine.

Slingshot? That's medieval.

Quick, fire up the smoker! We're having smoked pork butt for dinner.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Jam Session

2011-07-29T15:48:00.001-05:00

She also purchased a crapton of sugar and pectin:

Why, yes! That IS a 25 pound of hunka hunka C&H LOVE. Quick! Someone call an ambulance for my pancreas.

We all donated some jars:

I hereby declare that Christy must ALWAYS provide a plaid tablecloth for our canning adventures.

Then, we got started.

We cooked some plums:

Then, we strained the plums, cooked the "jelly juice", skimmed the foam and filled the jars.

Each jar's rim had to be carefully wiped to ensure a good seal:

Then each jar was treated to hot water bath to entice some proper sealing.

After the jelly was done, we got to work on the jam. First, the plums had to mashed through a food mill. By hand, with a huge, wooden pestle.

It was probably the least pleasant of all the tasks:

Although, for some reason, Celeste is a picture of frivolity.

After mashing the pulp through the food mill, by hand, we cooked the jam down with more sugar, more pectin. Then, we filled jars. Again.

In particular, I LOVED the banged-up, dented to hell, old-fashioned tin funnel - it was one of Christy's grandmother's funnels. I miss tinned utensils. Sigh.

After 6 hours of work, we had 48 half-pints and 9 full pints of jelly and jam.

Aren't they pretty?

I am hoping this will become an annual tradition. How often does one get to spend an entire day with friends they love AND come home bearing jars of jelly?

And now, I need to figure out where to hide my stash of Sandhill Plum jelly from my family because seriously, they are not worthy.

*The full set of photos can be found here.

Literally Literary: The Prologue

2011-07-27T10:39:00.002-05:00

Recent library book sale finds. All $12 of it. I snagged some Judy Blume (including a boxed set! SCORE.), some Encyclopedia Brown, Sylvia Plath, Wally Lamb and some adult-era Laura Ingalls Wilder. No Paul Zindel, but I was still quite happy.

Since getting the e-reader, my strategy for book-buying has changed. Previously, I would search The Dusty Bookshelf first (a used bookstore in Lawrence)..... then I'd scoot through Borders (always with a coupon in hand. Always). In the meantime, I would search the random garage sale or thrift store in order to keep my "To Read" bookshelf stocked. The library would also come into play here and there.

When I first got the e-reader, I was a little out of control with it. The impulse purchasing coupled with the resistance to reading by any other means led to some significant money spent in the first few months. Gradually, the newness of the e-reader wore off as I realized how much money I was spending. Sure, I am willing to spend a certain amount of money on my book hobby. But I want to be smart about it.

I needed a new strategy.

Now, I gauge whether or not I can get the book from the library, keeping in mind how fast I can get it versus how badly I want it. Jennifer Egan's "A Visit from the Goon Squad"? Eh. I'll wait for that. Conversely, as Hold #320 with only 36 copies to go around, I wasn't willing to wait for Anne Patchett's "State of Wonder" which so far, has been well worth the 12 bucks. Other times, I have no choice on waiting, dependent upon bookclub deadlines. Also, if I decide to purchase the book for the Kindle, I download a sample first. Then, I actually READ THE SAMPLE before deciding whether to purchase it. I am totally digging this "sample feature" - wouldn't it be lovely if we could do that with jeans? Cosmetics? Handbags?

Recently, it was announced that Borders will be closing all of its stores. What happened to Border is obvious, so I don't have any new insight into that. In short, they completely screwed up by missing the e-reader boat. Still, I was a little surprised at how sad their closing has made me. Yes, I am hooked on my e-reader and am trying to make better use of our library, but Borders was still a destination for us. It was a place to check out books in person, a spot to pick up my knitting reads and other glossy non-fiction things. It's also a great place to buy cute, little gifts and let my kids explore books on their own (again, limitations on the library - have you tried to get a hold of Fancy Nancy in your library? She's a hot piece of property in ours.) Furthermore, Borders is near to where I live and I drive by it throughout the week. Although, admittedly, since getting my e-reader, my trips into the store have been more sporadic, instead of nearly every week.

While I am sad that Borders is closing, I know that I did my own little part in nudging along their demise.

Goodbye Blue Sky

2011-07-25T09:16:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Wall 1979

I spent Saturday at my friend Christy's along with our friends Celeste and LuAnn making Sand Hill Plum jelly and jam. After making 48 half-pints and 9 full pints of jelly and jam, Christy and I collapsed onto her couch and watched Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. I do not buy many DVDs these days, but that is one I think I need to own. For my very own self. Because seriously? HILARIOUS.

Christy lives out in the country and as I left her house, these were the scenes with which I was greeted:

I do love living in the soul-sucking suburbs, but wow - I also miss bales of hay and gorgeous sunsets.

The day before, on Friday, because that is the day before Saturday, I loaded up Team Chaos and headed into Kansas City to catch the Monet exhibit at the Nelson-Atkins Museum. The exhibit features one of only two triptychs by Monet in the United States and it was well worth seeing.

Also, there is nothing more cleansing to the soul than frantic screeching in hushed tones at your kids to remind them to keep their meaty paws off of the pretty, priceless works of art.

Art that may, or may not, resemble steaming piles of poo.

I was yelled at only once by a security guard to stop with the flash photography and my kids were yelled at only three times by several security guards.

However, my kids were yelled at by me no less than 2,432 times.

At one point, I grumbled that I was never bringing them to the museum again and Arun started to CRY. Then, he timidly said "If we go into this one room right here, then can we leave? But still come back another day?" And thus, we zoomed through the Chinese scrolls, then made a hasty retreat.

Finally! An escape! And shuttlecocks!

The nice thing about the suburban prairie is living between the city and country. Having easy access to both is totally worth handing over my soul to the dark forces.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Sweet!

2011-07-22T09:09:00.000-05:00

Lately, we have been eating a crapton of sweet corn from the nearby farm stand. However, my husband is emphatic that sweet corn isn't healthy so I looked up the nutritional content. I found this article and also this information on Wikipedia:

Cooked sweet corn has significant antioxidant activity, which has been suggested to reduce the chance of heart disease and cancer, although this has not been definitively proven in practice.[citation needed] "There is a notion that processed fruits and vegetables have a lower nutritional value than fresh produce. Those original notions seem to be false, as cooked sweet corn retains its antioxidant activity, despite the loss of vitamin C," says Rui Hai Liu assistant professor of food science at Cornell University.[citation needed] The scientists measured the antioxidants' ability to quench free radicals, which cause damage to the body from oxidation. Cooked sweet corn also releases increased levels of ferulic acid, which provides health benefits, such as battling cancer. "When you cook it, you release it, and what you are losing in vitamin C, you are gaining in ferulic acid and total antioxidant activity."

I also found this:

Okay....okay.... sweet corn is never going to win awards as some sort of Wonder Food, but it still makes for a healthier dessert option!

Goodbye Cruel World

2011-07-18T15:08:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Wall 1979

I thought it would be amusing to take a video of Daniel, our Pinktoe tarantula (avicularia avicularia) catching a cricket. Yes, I am fully aware this may indicate that I have gone to the dark side, what with me posting horrid videos of arachnid-led death and destruction upon hapless crickets.

Daniel, our pink toe tarantula catching a cricket from Kelli Oliver George on Vimeo.

Perhaps then, you may find it even more unconscionable that I would post a video of Arun, my simian son (homo sapien) doing his best rendition of our tarantula catching said cricket.

Arun, imitating Daniel the Pinktoe Tarantula catching a cricket from Kelli Oliver George on Vimeo.

And I wonder why on earth I never get selected for BlogHer's Voices of the Year.

*Shrugs*

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Loco for Locavores

2011-07-15T14:38:00.001-05:00

Huh. Since bloody, cut feet do not usually inspire appetites, it seemed that a festival featuring FOOD would make for a strange choice of venue.

You had me at "meatball".

Far and away, my favorite was the Magical Meatball Tour guys. From here on out, I am going to require ALL of my meatballs to contain at least a teaspoon of magic.

This was my main squeeze all evening.

These fresh-squeezed limeades were so yummy that it inspired me to make some at home. I tried this Honey Limeade recipe and loved it.

This weekend we are getting cupcakes from Tabby's Treats for Anjali's birthday party. Yes, that is the same Tabby of the Super Mario Nintendo Cupcakes Fame. I am picking them up this evening and I am worried because that means there will be cupcakes. In my house. A full 24 hours before the party.

Personally, I think Tabby needs to include chastity belts with her cupcakes.

Fat Old Sun

2011-07-13T16:33:00.003-05:00

Pink Floyd, Atom Heart Mother 1970

Today's post title is courtesy of Kansas City temperatures in excess of 100 degrees, with humidity. It's a darned good thing I got that leaky radiator fixed last weekend. Since I am a colossal idiot, I had confused the H and C levels. I did not even realized the car was over-heating until my Friend the Car Mechanic pointed it out. I'd like my V8 with a shot of vodka, please.

I really do not care to think too much on all of the different scenarios that could have resulted due to my failure in cognition.

Anyway!

Other than the heat and an unrelenting desire to find something interesting to do that involves that sweet, blessed artificial climate known as "air-conditioned indoors", things are pretty damned good right now.

Anjali's birthday weekend was packed full of fun and cake. Anjali's Pretend Mama even kicked it into high gear and got her presents and threw her a fancy party. I was really hoping her Pretend Mama would get her a pony because the only pony Anjali is getting from her Real Mama comes in varying hues of pastel. (Yes, the Pretend Family is still in full gear and now includes a Pretend Baby Boy and a Pretend Dog. Sorry, Lucy - even you got upgraded.)

We are also still in full-on Boardgame Mode. We are now playing Sorry with the 5-card hand version of the rules, which certainly makes it interesting but we have not tried Payday . I did buy Rummikub which is really fun and quite challenging (I still have to help Arun with some of his decisions, but he got the basic concept down quickly). And that Blokus game I mentioned? SO MUCH AWESOME. I wish I could get Manoj to play with us, because I think that game would get crazy with more people. Next up, is the Angry Birds Boardgame. It should arrive on Monday and Arun is ~~I am~~ eagerly counting the days.

Totally Tangential: In your family, do you pay Monopoly fines to the center of the board and then when someone lands on Free Parking, they get the money? I call it the "kitty" and Arun giggles whenever I meow as he pays his fines (I hiss when *I* pay fines. Of course.) Arun also now kisses his money when I pay him rent. I have NO idea where he learned such poor sportsmanship. *Cough*

And now, I shall commence with some random mommyblogging.....

The Team of Chaos Enjoys a Rainy Day

Rainy Days from Kelli Oliver George on Vimeo.
A silly thing I shot awhile back. Notice how I patently ignore Arun? At the end, I seem to notice there is a little boy sitting in my car. Oh right, Arun. My SON.

The Team of Chaos Hath Spoken
Anju: Can I have some more tea?
Me: That was the last of it, I'll have to some more from scratch.
Anju: What? You don't have any SCRATCH?

"Scratch" - a new ingredient coming soon to an iced tea near you!

*****
Anjali begins many of her sentences with "furthermore" and "I suppose". Examples:

Me: Anju, pick up those toys.

Anjali: I don't want to. Furthermore, Arun was the one who got them out!

Me: Anju, just pick them up, please?

Anjali: ALL RIGHT. I suppose I can pick them up.

******
Just as I was getting ready to hit "publish", Arun walked in to ask a question.

Me: Arun, why is your finger so dirty?
Arun: I was eating jelly. I sneaked it and I didn't want you to know.
Me: Dude, you gotta learn to wash your hands if you are going to lead a life of crime.
Arun: Huh?

Mother of The Year, folks! It's a major award!

Free Four

2011-07-09T12:50:00.001-05:00

Pink Floyd, Obscured by Clouds 1972

How did this:

Become THIS?

It seems, just yesterday, she was so small.

Now? Not so much.

The curly hair?

No longer so curly. Sniff.

However. Her fashion choices?

Still leave something to be desired.

Her brother greeted his new "bee-bee" with stalker-like tendencies.

He's calmed down now, but is still really into his sister.

She will argue with me ALL DAY LONG, but later that night, she will climb into my lap, snuggle close and rub my tummy with her hand while she drifts asleep.

She loves princesses, the color pink, unicorns, kitties and anything frilly. Add some Glitter and you're golden. She only wears skirts, but will happily dig in the mud for worms. And she's not afraid to catch frogs and bugs. Her favorite books are Fancy Nancy, Barbie, Cat the Cat and anything nonfiction having to do with bugs, frogs and reptiles. Her favorite Powerpuff girl is Buttercup ("because Buttercup is ROUGH, Mama.") She knows as much about dinosaurs as her brother and she wants to be a paleontologist when she grows up.

All in all, she's really come into her own.

And we cannot wait to see where she goes from here.

Happy birthday, Peanut Butter Anjali.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: The Belle of Tinkering

2011-07-08T14:04:00.000-05:00

2- 14.5 oz. cans Mexicorn (drained)

1 10oz can Rotel (drained)

1 bunch green onions, chopped

1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

1/2 to 1 tsp of sugar

1.5 cups Greek yogurt

1 cup Mayonnaise

Mix together and serve with tortilla chips.

Note: This recipes gets even better as it sits, thus making it a perfect dish to prepare early in the morning or the night before!

Celeste, I made this post just for you!

2011-07-07T09:11:00.000-05:00

Years ago, I had this friend who had written an entertaining account of her experiences raising a passel of sea monkeys and she had created an email subscription of it. I read the archives and declared "You should start a blog!" Others urged her to do the same.

Finally, in 2004, she created Average Jane, thus ensuring a stream of free entertainment for years to come. (Thanks, Celeste! We owe you!) I call her blog the "most oxymoronically titled blog of all time" and I like to call her Not-So-Average Jane (behind her back, of course.)

Quite simply, Celeste, is probably one of the most interesting persons I know and is anything but average. How many folks invite their friends to celebrate their birthday at a Food Truck Festival?

Also, she's always doing something - helping a local animal shelter every week, herding her own cats, raising veggies, reading books, belonging to 3 different book clubs, hosting game nights, singing in heavy metal bands, writing lyrics to music, taking long walks every morning, experimenting with cooking and baking, trying different restaurants, volunteering for charities, doing yoga, traveling and still keeping up on television, pop culture and social media. I don't know how she does it. It is as if she posses a special life force in which she can bend time.

Average Jane, Beer Maven

I saved this snap for a special occasion because the best part of this picture? All of that is not her beer.

Celeste was definitely one of the primary forces who led me into blogging - I saw how much fun she was having and happily jumped into the fray a few months later. In the summer of 2005, she casually mentioned that she was going to a small blogging conference for women and hey, would anyone else like to go? I was late in my pregnancy with Arun and jumped at the chance for a gal's trip. That marked our first BlogHer and except for the year Anjali was born, I have gone ever since. The incredible experiences I have had through blogging and the amazing friends I have made these past 7 years? I owe Celeste for that.

Thank you, Celeste.

Amongst her many super powers, Celeste wields considerable influence over small children and has charmed her way into Arun and Anjali's hearts as well. In fact, when I have plans with Celeste that do not include my kids, I have to hide this fact from them or they get jealous.

Average Jane, Adopted Aunt to the Masses

Celeste and Anjali, walking in the Rivermarket.

Happy birthday, old friend.

I mean, not because you are old, per se, but rather because we have been friends for so long. Of course, if we are going to honest, you will always be older than me, but this is probably not the appropriate time to point that out, right?

Money

2011-07-06T10:34:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Dark Side of the Moon 1973

I really, really like board games.

One of my sweetest memories from childhood is that of playing Monopoly with my parents. Both of them, together. Because they were still married. And we were a family. I also cherish the memories of playing Sorry! with my mom. And card games - oh, the card games.... Speed and Russian Bank were my favorites. I do remember my mom teaching me Crazy Eights, which seemed easy and sorta fun.

I own 21 decks of cards - all the variations of canasta I play require a good 10 decks. The rest are extras for playing Nerts, a gangland style of Solitaire. It's pretty hardcore, folks. When I see new packs of cards at garage sales, I cannot resist. It is not a problem. Yet.

This is my favorite set of cards - they are good, quality cards and have ruined me for cheap cards. I have had these cards forever, they were a present from my Aunt Blenda.

I told Arun the other day that I think he is finally ready for Crazy Eights. He can already play Uno and they are essentially the same game anyway. He is SO excited to play with the beautiful deck of cards that are normally forbidden to him.

We started playing Monopoly Jr. over the weekend. Simple strategy, addition, subtraction and multiplication. And the games are quick - about 30 minutes a piece. What's not to love about that?

Well, I suppose losing is not fun.

Yes, winning is infinitely more fun.

Let's move on to the game of Sorry! Basically like Parcheesi, but easier.
More American, less Indian?

Gentle Reader, I'm in heaven here. We have also started playing Blokus, which is AWESOME. I am ready to dig out Payday next. And! I cannot wait to bust out the cribbage board. Or show him my gorgeous, hand-made backgammon board with Bakelite pieces.

Hurry up little boy. Hurry up.

Well, maybe you should not grow up too much. Once you head to college, who will play games with me?

Flaming

2011-07-05T15:22:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Piper at the Gates of Dawn 1967

Weekend before last, I went to Indianapolis to say goodbye to my friend. Jeepers, It was a weird trip of epic proportions. It involved my flight out there being delayed by 2 hours and an arrival at my hotel at 1am. It involved a trip for Arun to Urgent Care and a frantic trip for ME to a far, far away Kinko's store to scan insurance cards because of COURSE, the single time I do not leave the cards, is the one instance where Manoj really, really needed them. It involved my cell phone dying in the middle of all of this and I went 8+ hours kickin' it Old School without a phone (Note: this is where I appreciate my husband so very much because I knew he had it covered and that Arun would be fine.) I had to kick it Old School yet again because all of my carefully plotted Google Maps were WORTHLESS in the face of crazy Indianapolis road construction and I found myself peering at a teeny, tiny rental car agency map while navigating broken down interstate highway after highway after highway. After the memorial service Saturday evening, I then returned my rental car so that I could take the hotel shuttle back to the hotel that evening so that the next morning, I wouldn't have to deal with the rental car return. I thought I would avoid some headache Sunday morning and it seemed like a good plan at the time. Sigh. Except while at the airport, I missed the first hotel shuttle back to the hotel. And had to wait 1.5 hours for the next shuttle.

While waiting for the hotel shuttle, I had an interesting encounter. Since I was just returning the rental car and not catching a flight, I suspect I looked odd just walking around with a dying rose and my high heels looped on my fingers (I wore comfortable sandals to walk around the airport in). Apparently, this caught the attention of two guys sitting nearby waiting for their own shuttles. One of the guys claimed he had bit parts in Seinfeld and Cheers.

Call me a Suspicious Sally, but do you recognize the guy on the left? I sure don't.

Guy on the left claims to have had bit parts on Seinfeld (a plot where he was helping Kramer with his golf game) and Cheers (he played some part of a volleyball player). Guy on the right said he was in stand-up comedy, but that I wouldn't know him. Guy in the middle was the hotel shuttle driver. I definitely didn't know him!

The last bit of Bizarro Weekend in Indianapolis happened when I found out I had to take one of the earliest hotel shuttles back to the airport Sunday morning since the later ones were already full. Which meant that just before 5am on Sunday, I was back at the airport with over 2 hours until my flight.

Did you get any of that?

So, last week was spent catching up on life and rectifying my piss poor attitude. I think I have worked myself out of the funk now and I plan to back to my regularly scheduled Ranting and Raving.

You really missed me, didn't you?

**********

I mentioned awhile back that the sands of my social horizons have been shifting - I've joined a Mom's group and a few of us did the Lenexa Freedom Run 5K (we walked, which was fine by me because I've been out of my workout routine the past month!) Week before last, I randomly met a mom at McDonald's Playplace - we were both escaping the heat and were hiding in the same corner from some overzealous sports moms (shudder!) We got to chatting because I had forgotten my Kindle and was forced to interact with my fellow humans (the horrors! I'm a Kindle Mom!) Anyway! Turns out, our kids are in the same Kindergarten class and now, I have another meetup scheduled with Elizabeth this week. . Also, last week, I had a fun Blogger/Twitter meetup with Sarah last week - not only did our kids get along great, but it was so relaxing to hang out with another mom who likes to talk about things other than kids, who also blogs/uses social media, who watches TV and the best part! A mom who is equally unapologetic about her Excessive E-Reader Use. I mean, you can only watch your kid go down the same slide so many times, right? Right.

Last week, I finished up The Perks of Being a Wallflower (Hat Tip, Zoot!) which was sweet and sensitive and heartbreaking all at once. It is going to be a movie and features two of my favorite actresses - Mae Whitman and Emma Watson. Furthermore, if the producers can secure all the rights, it is going to have a kickass soundtrack. If you are a Young Adult fiction fan, I cannot recommend this book highly enough!

I'm currently reading Before I Go To Sleep (Hat Tip, Jennifer and Sarah!) I'm almost finished and the suspense is killing me. I think I have it figured it out, but then again, do I? DO I? This read is a Clicker (Old School Term: "page-turner") click....click....click....

Last weekend was nice, Arun and I played a crap-ton of boardgames (another post forthcoming because it deserves a spot of its own) and then like much of the country, we enjoyed celebrating our country's birthday yesterday.

Yes, we have a "no fireworks" ordinance in our city. That no one but our neighbors actually follow.

In related news, our neighbors hate us.

Lucy and Pearson joined forces in their silent protest of our fireworks use.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: For the Love of Garlic

2011-06-24T17:00:00.000-05:00

YUM. The smell of garlic hitting a pan of hot oil is out of this world.

Next, I am reconsidering my use of powdered ginger.

So, what is Your Thing when it comes to cooking? Something that you go the extra step to prepare because it is important to you.

*****
Today's recipe is the result of a Labor of Love. Kai Kratiam (Garlic Pepper Chicken) is one of my husband's favorite dishes at our favorite Thai restaurant here in Kansas City - the Thai Place. I searched long and hard for a recipe, but just couldn't find one that replicated the restaurant's version. Then, I had a Lightbulb moment while going through some Rick Bayless recipes - he mentioned that chicken breast is a great substitute for pork and I realized that I needed to re-examine ALL of my cookbooks (Frankly, my eyes immediately glaze over when pork is mentioned in a cookbook since the extent of our pork consumption is the occasional slice of bacon and pepperoni on our pizza.) So, there it was all along in my copy of Simply Thai Cooking- Moo Kratium, the pork version of the the dish I'd been looking for. I still had to modify it a bit - adding cabbage at the end and some fish sauce in the beginning. But it is about as close as I can get to The Thai Place's version, I guess.

Also, this recipe calls for 2 tablespoons of chopped garlic, but I have to admit I put in half a bulb of garlic.

Mmmmm.... GARLIC.

Kai Kratiam (Garlic Pepper Chicken)

Ingredients:
1 lb chicken breast, thinly sliced strips, 2 inches long
1 tsp fish sauce
2 tbsp soy sauce
1 tsp black pepper
2 tbsp chopped garlic
1/2 head cabbage, thinly sliced strips
5 tbsp vegetable oil

Optional Garnishes:
Lettuce leaves
Strips of red bell pepper
Fresh coriander leaves
Sweet and Sour sauce

Preparation:
1. In a bowl, marinate the chicken, fish sauce, soy sauce, black pepper and garlic for 5 minutes (up to 30 minutes is fine).

2. On medium-high, heat oil in a wok or large frying pan. Add the chicken mixture and spread it out evenly. Fry the chicken until it is brown on one side, about 3-5 minutes. Turn the chicken over and add the sliced cabbage. Fry the other side of the chicken another 3-5 minutes while letting the cabbage sit on top.

3. Either serve this with white rice or serve it on top of a bed of lettuce. No, really!

Childhood's End

2011-06-22T16:38:00.003-05:00

Pink Floyd, Obscured by Clouds 1972

This weekend, I am heading to Indianapolis to say goodbye to my friend. The past few weeks have been a flurry of wrapping some things up, getting travel reservations finalized, etc. All this while hoping that Manoj's relaxed standards toward Food Safety and Storage kick in and that while I am gone, he finishes all the leftovers in the fridge. One of the many, many benefits to my Indian husband is his Intestines Forged of Iron.

Added to my list lately has been what I like to call Spoiled White Girl Problems, I've Got 'Em

Spoiled White Girl Problems, I've Got 'Em

Exhibit A: The toaster broke. WOE IS ME, I have to buy a new goddamned toast because without toast, our house falls APART.

Exhibit B: The DVD player broke. WOE IS ME, not only did I have to wait an extra day to finish Dexter: Season One, but I also had to pay more MONEY. And in the category of Mo' Money, Mo' Problems, I had to agonize over whether to upgrade to a Blu-Ray player. Agony, I tell you. Because I am a Spoiled White Girl and Made of Money. Lots of MONEY.

Exhibit C: The Dishwasher broker. WOE IS ME, we have to buy a part for it now with all that Money I was just bragging about. While I have freely admitted in the past that I enjoy washing dishes by hand, what I do not particularly relish is a marathon episode of washing an entire load of dishes that had been languishing impatiently for several days in the aforementioned, traitorous DishNotWasher.

Exhibit D: The clothes washer was leaking for a day . WOE IS ME. Fortunately, it was leaking inside the tub thingie. And while we have established that I clothe myself in MONEY, I still smacked that bastard around until it had the good sense to get its act together and stop the hell with The Leaking.

Exhibit E: Meanwhile, my fancy pants car has gotten wind of the recent unrest and is on the brink of revolt. The air conditioner seems to be in cahoots and at times, I find myself sitting in traffic sweating. Folks, SWEATING. Gentle Reader, have I already not mentioned the Spoiled and White part? WOE IS ME. Seriously, sweat is just not My Thing. Trust me, I have other Things that are My Thing. I cannot think of what those other Things might possibly be, but whatever, I have Things, I assure you.

And yet, despite all this recent mutiny, our 20+ year old grease-spattered oven that melts kitchen timers survives. Speaking of the wretched Kitchen Timer, I need to add that to the shopping list. Also? Add MONEY. I am in want of more of it.

The final tick on my To Do list that I had hoped to have wrapped up was a myriad of outside projects getting fixed on our house after a crazy hailstorm in April. Our contractor comes out, fixes one thing, then leaves. Or, even better, tries to fix the WRONG THING. Then, he leaves. Every single day, my To Do list includes the item "Call Stan."

With that, I am going to throw out some cute things my kiddos have said and slap up some Simian Snappage.

And then, I am going to call Stan.

Of course.

*******
Anjali: All the elephants in India wear COSTUME clothes!

I don't know where she gets that idea.

Source: Rajesh Kakkanatt, courtesy Suresh Babu, Wikipedia

*****
Arun: Anju why were you crying during musical chairs at school today?
Anju: Because I was missing Mama.
Me: Anju, but I thought you didn't like me.
Anju: Yes, but I miss you while I am at SCHOOL.

******
The other day, Anjali asked for something and yet, I did not rise immediately to meet Her Royal Highness' latest whim.

Anju: Mama, you aren't getting my milk! You have to do things you don't WANT to do. That's what grownups are FOR, helping CHILDREN.

Damned straight, I am one Spoiled White Girl.

Scream Thy Last Scream

2011-06-20T09:26:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, 1967

Sleeping With Daddy, Take 4,327,843,212

For 5.5 years, this has been such a common sight in our house. While I cannot give him too much credit for Anjali, our little narcoleptic, Manoj does deserve full marks for still being able to get Arun to sleep.

My husband, the Indian Cesar Milan of Simians.

Tomorrow is our 8 year wedding anniversary and I have been teasing Manoj that we need to celebrate the union of our love. After all, there is so much to celebrate.

We are so very, very lucky.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Stirring Things Up

2011-06-17T13:05:00.000-05:00

1 tbsp garlic, chopped

2 tsp ground ginger

1 onion,. thinly sliced

2 cups diced tomato
1 tsp cayenne pepper (or less if you prefer mild)
salt to taste (about 1 tsp)
1/2 cup cilantro, chopped
2 tsp cumin powder
2 tsp coriander powder

Preparation:
1. Coat the bottom of a frying pan or wok with cooking oil and heat on medium-high. Brown the chicken, stirring frequently. After about 7 minutes, add the garlic and ginger.

2. When the chicken is pretty much done, add the salt, cayenne pepper, tomatoes and onions. Fry for about 5 minutes or so, until the tomatoes break apart.

3. In another small frying pan, coat the bottom with a very small amount of cooking oil and heat on medium-high. Add the cumin and coriander, stir constantly (add a teaspoon of water if it becomes sticky). Cook for about 3 minutes, until the spices become aromatic.

4. Add the cumin/coriander mixture to the chicken and stir thoroughly. Taste for salt, garnish with a handful of chopped cilantro.

Keep Talking

2011-06-15T21:06:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Division Bell 1994

This spring, I came up with a few goals for myself to achieve this summer:

Relearn at least one Clementi sonatina on the piano.
Remove the wallpaper in the dining room under the chair rail and repaint it to see if that tones down the floral motif. I might repaint the kitchen as well (decision is still pending based upon the outcome of the dining room.)
Rejoin a local mom's group. Previously, when I was a member, I was either sick, pregnant and sick, dealing with dual nap schedules or working. It was always something. This past spring, I put my foot down with myself and promised that I would not only rejoin the club, but that I would actively participate. Oh my. I am SO kicking myself for not getting involved all these past years! The group is comprised of a really nice group of gals who just want to hang out and do fun, relaxing things with their kids. No gossip, no politics, they are just a low-key group.
Participate in the summer reading program with my kids. Oh sure, I am always reading something, but I picked up one of the lists for myself - I am going to read a certain number of poems and short stories, just to stretch myself a bit (any recommendations on your favorite short stories or poems?)
Finally, I promised myself that I was going to SCHEDULE things. All too easily, I let our days go by willy-nilly. In particular, the few hours that I have free while Team Chaos languishes in school. This summer, I am scheduling lunches with friends, art museum outings, special exhibit outings (e.g. The Princess Diana exhibit was awesome!) and movies. Their summer session ends mid-July and I am determined to not waste any of these precious kid-free hours.
By the end of August, I want to add 5 new recipes to my repertoire. I have already added one that I am in LOVE with - it's Thai Chicken in a red chili sauce. I also have a stack of cookbooks from the library that I am poring over.

Honestly? Life is pretty damned good right now. I recently read Girl in Translation by Jean Kwok, one of the best books I have read in a long time. I then read Shanghai Girls and Memories of Joy by Lisa See - both were VERY good reads. Now, I've moved on to the 19th Wife - I am getting used to the different pace after having read three back-to-back books with Chinese immigrant themes.

Also, I joined a Facebook group that I affectionately refer to as the site about "Brown Boys and the White Girls Who Love Them". Honestly, I am surprised at how much it has meant to me to have a group that understands some of the things that go with being married to a desi. So far, the group is getting along with no drama (that I have seen anyway!) and it is really nice to have a place to go to. Lately, I've been spending more time on the group page than even on blogging! Huh.

Flower Power

Help! I am ripping out the wallpaper under the chair rail and am thinking of going with either a forest green or a dark, dark red. I prefer a red, but what do you think?

Cousins!

Anjali is INSANE over her cousin Alaina. They are simply too precious when they get together. They disappear during the entire visit, off in their own little world of make-believe.

Recently, we went to Leavenworth to visit my grandma. It was such a lovely visit - had a picnic by the river, then visited the Carousel Museum. Afterward, we went back to her house where she showed the kids her piano, guitar, bongos, etc. (she is a music teacher and is so talented!) It was so sweet to watch Arun and Anjali's eyes light up as she went from instrument to instrument.

1850 Hand-Cranked Carousel

So Much Fun! This is the oldest operating carousel in the United States!

1913 Carousel

Simian Snap!

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Tastes Like Chicken

2011-06-10T10:49:00.000-05:00

Bill Oliver (aka Ollie), Foodie Extraordinaire

Okay, okay....My dad doesn't actually eat kitties. He hates them too much to actually consume them. Yes, the man who hates cats with a vengeance proceeded to have three daughters who adore cats.

A few weeks ago, I mentioned that Manoj doesn't eat beef, not for religious reasons since he is Christian, but rather for health reasons. A commenter, Nukkud, pointed out there there is a small Christian group in India that doesn't eat beef for moral reasons:

Some christian groups in india do not eat beef. Its a moral thing. Its a big misunderstanding when people say it is a religious thing.

Beef is not eaten by many groups in india for the same reason why americans do not eat dog or horse.

The dog is known as a "mans best friend" while a horse is known as a "companion". Similarly, cows are seen as a symbol of mother and motherhood. In india, anything that carries a "motherly" connotation is serious stuff and hence, "beef" related subjects raise strong emotions.

Source: Maternal family are christians from coastal maharashtra and they strictly avoid beef.

Nukkud then goes on to add:

The keralites are an anomaly in india. Actually, a big chunk of hindu malayali population eats beef, though it's done behind closet.

I agree to a certain extent that Keralites are an anomaly, but I would also argue the Keralites are just one of many, many anomalies scattered through India. For example, I have seen so many Hindus over the past 20 years consume beef and only a handful were from Kerala. The primary problem with discussing food choices in conjunction with daring to enter the choppy waters that comprise the complex cultural, ethnic and religious diversity of a country such as India is this:

Regardless of what I say, it will be wrong.

A country such as India holds just about every exception to every rule and as a writer, every single time I choose to write about India or Indians, I run the risk of someone pointing out the exceptions and exactly where I went astray.

Honestly? I really appreciated Nukkud's comments because they were respectful and most importantly, they made me think. Folks, you are always welcome to disagree with me and bonus points are awarded for making me think.

Generally, I believe morality and religion often have nothing to do with each other since so much religious dogma is based upon traditions with little explanation (two of the most moral persons I have ever known were atheists and grew up with no religion whatsoever.) Furthermore, religious traditions often become confused and infused with cultural tradition. I mainly mentioned the "Christian eating beef" thing in regard to my husband because there is a common misconception amongst many Americans where they believe all Indians are Hindus who don't eat beef. Often I find myself explaining that "Yes, my married name is George and no, my husband did not convert to Christianity for me." And then, I laugh because it really does tickle me. Besides, it helps to navigate life with a healthy sense of humor toward these things.

Truthfully, I can only speak to my own personal experiences and quite simply, I have seen way too many Hindus eating beef, Jews and Muslims eating pork and Catholics eating meat on Fridays to think that religion holds some greater power over our stomachs.

I freely admit that I have few "morals" when it comes to food. I don't eat horses, cats, dogs or frogs not due to morals or potential companionship issues, but rather due to personal taste. I love veal and I will happily tear through foie gras. Perhaps, this makes me a horrible person, but when you begin drawing lines in the sand with food choices, the tide will eventually sweep in to erase those lines. Even vegetarians have their own issues when it comes to "morals" as folks argue about the benefits to locally grown produce.

Anyway! All of this talk about different food choices reminded me of a tongue-in-cheek blog post that I wrote long ago when I was doing a blogging for our old business FoodieBytes (Full Disclosure: We sold our stake in that business earlier this year and we now own zero shares in it)

I wanted to end this post on a light note because in the end, food should be FUN, right?

***********

7 Wonders of the Food World That Make Me Wonder

While I like to pretend that my gaping maw is adventurous, I admit that I have my limits. Some of the following dishes definitely look better than others. Some even push the definition of “edible“.

Which ones would you try or have you tried? What is the most unusual food you have ever eaten?

1. BILTONG – SOUTH AFRICA

Biltong is a cured meat process that originates from South Africa – it is commonly made from cuts of beef, but can also be made with venison and ostrich (a version with fish is called bokkums.) Biltong differs from jerky in that the meat strips are a bit thicker and vinegar is used in the cured process.

Chance of me eating this bad boy: 75% (this looks worthy of my gullet.)

2. TEA WITH YAK BUTTER – TIBET

Okay, I could not help but include this one since I have actually tried it. Truthfully? I liked it. An odd concoction, to be sure, it was milky, salty and a little “oily” — which is an interesting addition to one’s tea. Definitely not a tea you would be served at Buckingham Palace! Although I suspect Tibetans serve their tea with far less attitude than the Queen…….

Chance of me slurping this again: 100%

3. CENTURY EGG – ASIA

Century eggs actually arose as a solution to a common sense problem – how to keep a precious food from going rotten in times of hardship. Generally, century eggs are duck, chicken or quail eggs that are preserved in a “mixture of clay, ash,salt, lime, and rice straw for several weeks to several months, depending on the method of processing.” Personally? I prefer my eggs not to be featured in odd hues of green.

Chance of me eating this bad boy: 0% (although admittedly, the odds would be greatly improved should I ever find myself faced with a Triple Dog Dare while plied with booze.)

4. DURIAN – ASIA

Obviously, any fruit that gets itself banned from mass transportation is worthy of some sort of title. However, it is not clear whether it is the actual stench or the fact this fruit looks like a lethal weapon that prompted such a ban. In that vein, the durian is probably the Official Stinkbomb of the fruitworld. As such, Wikipedia had this to say regarding the durian:

The unusual flavour and odour of the fruit have prompted many people to search for an accurate description, with widely divergent and passionate views expressed, ranging from highly appreciative to deep disgust.

I admit that I am curious enough to try this.

Chance of me eating this bad boy: 90% (Why not? At least it did not once have a heartbeat, right?)

5. ANTS

Actually, ants are eaten in a variety of locales all over the world including Australia, Mexico, Thailand, Brazil, Columbia, etc. (the ones pictured are Honeypot Ants which are eaten by Australian Aborigines). I remember reading about this as a kid, so perhaps this is why it does not freak me out nearly as much as say, a roasted tarantula.

Chance of me eating these bad boys: 90% (Not much would be needed to bolster my gastronomical resolve on this one.)

6. SANNAKJI – KOREA

I will never forget when my Korean marketing professor in college told our class about his favorite dish, sannakji, a food that he missed desperately from back home. In short, this consists of eating octopus while it is still alive. He even giggled when he described how the tentacles would stick to the inside of your mouth. Oh sure, I love me some squid/octopus, but I would rather my food not be able to mount a rising protest while I am consuming it. If you have a hankering for such fare and you find a spot serving it, don't hesitate. You probably should hit that before PETA gets a whiff of this potential animal rights violation.

Chance of me eating these bad boys: 0% (Consuming food as it is fighting for its life is simply not My Thing.)

7. BALUT – ASIA

File this under the “Interesting in Theory, Not So Much On My Plate” category: balut is a fertilized duck or chicken egg that has not quite completed its development, much less hatched. While it is considered a delicacy in parts of Asia including the Philippines, Cambodia and Vietnam, I hesitated including this stomach-turner. However, it won out in the Interest of Interesting, although I did decide to spare you the pictures (click the link if you have a strong stomach.) Oddly, I could not find any restaurants serving it in NYC, Boston, SF, Chicago or DC. I wonder why.

Chance of me eating this bad boy: 0% (Dude. No WAY.)

Breathe

2011-06-08T11:38:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Dark Side of the Moon 1973

The worst part is not knowing when the tears will come

(In related news, I am in need of water-proof mascara.)

On Saturday, I was at the post office to send out a package to Vegas. I kept forgetting things in the car and had to go back and forth...back and forth. The last bit forgotten, the most important, was a pen. I was tired of hiking back to the car and so I asked the man, a priest, across the table if he had a pen. So there I am at a table with a priest taping up a HUGE stack of packages alongside a girl who was stamping wedding invitations. As if it was the beginning of a joke or something. A priest, a bride and a blogger walk into a post office together..... I began writing the address on the package and realized at that very moment I would need to address the box to Jolene's husband and not to Jolene herself.

And I promptly burst into tears.

I finished up the package, stuck it in the mailing bin and went to leave. As I was leaving, I spied a guy with a Pink Floyd shirt and I stopped him. I told him about my stupid blog and how I have been using Pink Floyd song titles for post titles and how much fun it has been and he challenged me to come up with a post for the song "Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict" and and I was all like "Dude! Already written!" and we laughed and I got into my car to drive away and I thought how that guy must have a wondered just a little about the freaky Pink Floyd fangirl blogger type with the raccoon eyes. And I laughed again. Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion (Quick! Which movie quote is that??! First to answer correctly wins a fucking PONY.)

Then, I promptly felt guilty for laughing. AGAIN. How dare I move on with my life? Right? Enter random beeping as all the synapses in my brain plot to form a coup d'etat over their host. Or something like that.

Okay, enough of that. Gentle Reader, I promised stupid, pithy posting. Here you go, no serious thinking required from here on out.

Over Memorial Day Weekend, my sister Maureen and I headed off to Branson, Missouri to hang out with the parents, check out Silver Dollar City, eat some barbecue, listen to some bluegrass, see some butterflies at the Butterfly Palace and last but not least, commune with the masses in the hotel pool.

Branson, fucking MISSOURI...... Hayseed Heaven...Redneck Vegas....the Shangri-la of Hillbilly Schtick.... an Ozarktopia of Baldknobber's Bliss.

Perhaps,YOUR father might enjoy vacationing in the South of France, but MY father prefers to languish in the south of MISSOURI. You are SO jealous right now that surely the green is seeping out of your nostrils, is it not?

ADMIT IT.

Ah, but I kid the south of Missouri. It is actually a nice, relaxing place to run to for a quickie weekend getaway.

Before this post completely careens off the rails, I am going to throw up some snaps and run far, far away. If you would like to see the complete set of my glamorous Branson, Missouri vacation which included a lovely sidetrip to a fish hatchery, you can see the slideshow here.

Preview of next week's post? My whirlwind trip to the Carousel Museum in Leavenworth KS last Friday.

You say Flyover State like that's a bad thing.

Cicada!

Hot damn, these guys were just GORGEOUS. I could NOT stop taking pictures of them.

Don't It Make My Big Eyes Bigger

Unfortunately, They Don't Sell New Attitudes in the Gift Shop

Anjali was bound and determined that I not get a single picture of her smiling the entire trip. Well played, baby girl. You win this round.

Safety In Numbers

I put my cell phone number on each of my kids' bellies. If they got lost, they could just ask someone to call me. Yes, they both actually know my number, but I was afraid they would blank on it if put on the spot or scared. Arun spent the whole day coming up to me and saying in a really loud voice "Excuse me, I'M LOST. Can you call MY MOM?!". Then, he'd giggle and RUN AWAY.

Bathing Beauty

Is there anything more peaceful than a kitty sleeping in the sun? I think not.

Shopping at the Brits Store in Lawrence KS is Cheaper Than Therapy

My Wallace and Gromit addiction continues unabated......

{Untitled}

2011-06-02T23:32:00.000-05:00

My friend Jolene, my fellow Tonganoxie High School and University of Kansas (School of Business) alum, passed away tonight and now, there is a 3.5 year old girl who will never hug her mother again.

I don't think I can add much more to that sentence.

Oh sure.... I could try, but it would simply all dissolve into a weepy, self-serving emotional sludge.

I am not sure if there will be a funeral yet, I have mixed feelings on that. Jolene did not want us to make a big fuss over her, that was not in her nature. I respect that. However, there is something comforting in saying goodbye. But, also? Funerals in Vegas? The Worst. It is difficult to explain the juxtaposition of being on a plane full of folks with high expectations of partying and gambling in contrast to one's own sadness and grief. I have already done that once, for my grandpa in 1999. But I will do it again, if given the chance.

In a heartbeat.

I am taking the next week off from writing here. I am going to regroup and come back with pithy posts about my kids, my latest Kindle obsession and something particularly gross for Friday's Intestinal Fortitude.

This will also be the last time I talk of Jolene's death - anything more and I tread into mawkish, narcissistic territory that smacks of self-serving. Instead, I am writing my memories of Jolene into a Word document that at some point, I will pass along to her husband. Memories that perhaps, her daughter will be interested in someday.

I am closing comments on this post. Instead of commenting, I would rather folks spend their time doing something kind - paying someone's parking meter, holding the door open for the person behind them, paying for the coffee for the person next in the line.

And most importantly, giving loved ones hugs. Lots and lots of hugs.

Please, do something kind today and don't do it randomly.

Make it full of purpose.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: The Kabob Edition

2011-05-27T09:30:00.000-05:00

Crumbling Land

2011-05-24T11:26:00.005-05:00

Pink Floyd, Zabriskie Point 1971

Last week, Arun, Manoj and I began dealing with the same bug that Anjali had just gotten over from the week prior. At first, it seemed to be nothing other than Ye Olde Standard Ebola. By Friday, it felt as if a bomb had gone off in my head. I staggered into urgent care Saturday morning, showing up just before they opened because I was so desperate. An hour later, I was diagnosed with an double ear infection and the doctor threw in eye and sinus infections for good measure. I picked up the resulting prescriptions and staggered back home. I have a dysfunctional eustachian tube in my left ear anyway and this ear infection has only served to turn my head into a vast cavern of cacophonic din ringing with white noise.

Sigh.

Later on, Saturday night became a nerve-wracking one for much of the Kansas City metro - we had thunderstorms in all directions, across multiple counties with reported tornado touchdowns here and there. Sirens going off at 11pm made even the most stoic of us nervous as we fired off jittery Tweets and Facebook messages to each other.

Manoj slept through it all.

However, Saturday was nothing, absolutely nothing compared to what Joplin faced the next day - just 160 miles south of us. A tornado 3/4 of a mile wide?? I doubt there are many folks in Kansas City who aren't thinking of Joplin today. You realize how bad things are when you feel lucky that you have a direct line into helping, into doing something. Lucky! My friend Ruth has a friend whose family lost their home. I am running some supplies over today to Ruth to pass to her friend so that she can take them down on Thursday. It's an odd emotion to be grateful that you can do something other than the obligatory donation to Red Cross.

I'm still wrapping my around that discord of emotion.

**********
This weekend, my sister Maureen are heading down to Branson to meet the parents. I am going to spend a silly weekend relishing my family, eating barbecue and listening to bluegrass music and cute hillbilly schtick. I am also going to do my best to be patient with these two little monkeys.

I am going to give them hugs all damned weekend long.

Everyone, have a good weekend and remember to love your loved ones.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: The Way to a Man's Heart

2011-05-20T12:27:00.002-05:00

Note: Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude is a weekly feature about food, food and more FOOD. No, I do not necessarily want to be a food blogger, but I do LOVE to talk about food prep, cooking food, eating food and making sweet love to food. Okay, maybe not the "sweet love" part. This is not meant to be some homage to 9^1/2 Weeks.
_______________

I’ll bet what motivated the British to colonize so much of the world is that they were just looking for a decent meal.
- Martha Harrison

December 1989: I begin to learn about the Pakistani and North Indian styles of cooking - prior to that, I had lived on packages of Lipton Rice because I had no idea how to cook ANYTHING. The boyfriend du jour was Pakistani and eventually, in my social circle, I would add a North Indian roommate, later a Vietnamese roommate along with a mix of friends from Egypt, Nigeria, Pakistan and Sri Lanka. It all made sense back then, although it's a little tricky to explain today.

November 2000: I'm no longer dating the Pakistani, my friends are scattered to the far ends of the Earth - I had mostly lost touch with them after college. I happen to meet a nice Catholic, South Indian boy from Kerala. He asked me to dinner and I told him I knew of a place that actually served dosas, a South Indian specialty. He was doubtful because South Indian food is such a rarity here in Kansas City. We met there for dinner and he was quite surprised. On our first date, the event where you display your Mate-Worthy Wares, I told him that I could cook Indian and of course, he was politely doubtful. However, the first time I did cook for him, he couldn't suppress his surprise and said "You really can cook." I took that as a compliment. Early in our relationship, I hunted for a cookbook on Kerala and came upon Maya Kaimal's "Savoring the Spice Coast of India: Fresh Flavors from Kerala". I got to work on learning how to cook with curry leaves, mustard seed, coconut milk and kudampuli. This Kansas girl even learned how to pick a damned good piece of fish. You see, I am nobody's fool. I really, really liked this boy and could see how much he loved food.

We've been together for over 10 years now.

For me, it was completely natural to do all of that - I love to cook and learning new recipes are the height of excitement when it comes to cooking. After all, We Who Love To Cook LIVE for sifting through cookbooks, hunting the Internet and pestering friends for recipes. However, since I learned how to cook primarily from foreigners, I am still weak when it comes to White People Food - I can do chili, ribeye steak, chicken n' dumplings and baked ziti. This has not been too much of an issue since Manoj only likes the baked ziti.

Wait. Actually, it has been an issue.

As much as I love Brown People Food, I am still very much 100% White Meat and it stings that Manoj has nixed two of my childhood favorites, two dishes I absolutely CRAVE on a wintery, snowy day.

Chili or Chicken n' Dumplings

Or, how about a hot, sultry day when a steak slapped on a grill served with a cool, arugula salad and side of fresh-cut cantaloupe is all my gullet requires?

Cue the Greek Chorus, folks.

To make matters worse, he has even blackballed a few of my favorite IndoPak dishes - vindaloo, haleem, nihari and chapli kabobs and chana. Christ on toast! What sort of Indian doesn't like vindaloo? Or chana? Okay...okay... I understand the beef issue. Manoj is anti-beef solely for health reasons - since he is from a Syrian Christian ethnic group, it's not for religious reasons. He's just trying to be healthy and save his beef consumption for the likes of Five Guys.

However, I did not give up so easily and over the years, I have scrounged around to find substitutes. I make this Peruvian Chicken Soup from Saveur and that fills my chicken n' dumpling void (sort of.) And he certainly does not mind slapping chicken tandoori on the grill, so sometimes, I will sneak a salad on the side. Occasionally, I will tell him that I must have chili or I WILL DIE and that he is going to have to Take One for the Team. At least I make it with turkey, he should be grateful. After all, I am sullying my Great-Grandma Daisy's chili with turkey, all in the name of Marital Compromise. And I do make keema with turkey, it still feels like a travesty, but at least I am getting my keema fix.

The one saving grace to all of this is that although Manoj has nixed some important food groups, he is still quite adventurous when it comes to eating. Since we have been together, I have added to our mix Mexican, Mediterranean, Thai and some American-style Chinese (despite my last post, I am okay with home-cooked Amercian style Chinese because I cut the sugar and greasy-fried parts WAY down) Oh! I can even sneak in White People Food (Curried Chicken Divan, anyone?)

Recently, I discovered a Filipino recipe for Chicken Braised in Coconut Sauce with Spinach. I found the recipe in the out-of-print The Asian Bistro Cookbook. Honestly, the recipe was horribly written, so I have cleaned it up here, which works quite neatly in keeping with copyright restrictions. This recipe hits a lot of notes - it is slightly rich because of the coconut milk, but the anchovies add a hint of sour. Also, I just LOVE the cloves in this - they really pique the tastebuds. This is a great cold weather dish because it is so savory and satisfying, but it is not so heavy that it can't be made in the middle of July. .

It is finding recipes like these that keep me going - knowing that I have years to look forward to in trying new things and having fun with cooking. Manoj may not eat vindaloo, beef or much White People Food, but at least he is open to my experimentations.

Although, I'm still a little resentful about the vindaloo.

Okay, is this a White People vs. Brown People thing? Those of you in Monochromatic Matches, have you encountered this? Are we the only couple in the history of coupledom to have to compromise when it comes to the kitchen?

Filipino Braised Chicken in Coconut Sauce With Spinach
Ingredients:
1 1/4 lb chicken breast, cut into bite-sized chunks
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/4 tsp ground cloves
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
3/4 tsp salt
12 oz fresh spinach, roughly chopped
6-8 green onions (separate green and white parts, then finely chop)
3 tbsp vegetable oil
1 tbsp finely chopped celery with leaves
2 tsp ginger powder
2 tsp garlic
2 tbsp finely chopped Italian flat parsley
1 tsp chopped anchovies
1 cup chicken stock
1 can coconut milk (14 oz) (lite or regular will work. I use lite)

Preparation:
1. Rub chicken pieces with the black pepper, cloves, cayenne and 1/4 tsp of the salt. Heat the oil over medium-high heat in a saucepan large enough to hold all the chicken. When the pieces are browned, remove them from the pan, leaving the oil behind in the pan.

2. Add the celery, ginger, garlic and the white portion of the chopped green onions to the pan. Cook until fragrant, a minute or so (if it sticks, add a tablespoon of water or two).

3. Stir in 1 tbsp of the parsley, the anchovies. Cook 30 seconds. (Again, if it sticks, just add a bit of water.)

4. Stir in the chicken stock and remaining salt (1/2 tsp); bring to a boil and cook until reduced by half. Slowly stir in coconut milk.

5. Add the chicken pieces and chopped spinach to the saucepan (don't worry if the spinach is overflowing a bit and seems too much for the pan - it will shrink drastically!) Reduce the heat to low, cover, and cook for 30 minutes.

6. Stir in the green portion of the chopped green onions and the remaining 1 tbsp of parsley. Serve with white rice.

Serves 4
Food-prep time: 30 minutes
Cooking time: 45 minutes

Notes: Don't skip the anchovies! I realize they are not popular, but they add a bit of sourness to this that is essential to offsetting the richness of the coconut milk. I love anchovies, so I either eat the rest of the tin or freeze the excess in a sandwich baggie for the next batch of this dish. Also, the original recipe calls for 2-4 tsp of finely chopped green chilis in Step 2. I leave this out for now because of our kids - however, I think this would be even more awesome spiced up. Also! I have yet to make this dish perfectly - I always mess up the addition of the green onions and add the wrong part at the wrong time. Guess what? It has always come out delicious anyway. Pretty much, this is fail-proof. One final note: This dish is even BETTER re-heated. This would make an excellent Sunday night dish with leftovers saved for later in the week on a busy night.

The Scarecrow

2011-05-17T11:19:00.000-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Piper at at the Gates of Dawn 1967

It was an interesting weekend - after Blogger horked on Friday, I finally was able to get my newest post up - check it out if you missed it. I am testing a series called Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude and it will serve as a spot for me to talk about food. Last Friday, I talked about Chinese Menus and the little-known secret of "authentic" menus, which has been life-changing for me. After years of hating Chinese food, a whole new world has opened up. This Friday, I am going to open up a bit about some of the gastronomic trials and tribulations Manoj and I have gone through over the years. Food has been one of our top sources of Pain and Pleasure in our marriage. I am also going to post a recipe for Filipino Braised Chicken With Coconut and Spinach which is to DIE FOR.

Besides posting on Friday, I took Team Chaos to the Cirque du Soleil production of Dralion, which was the Awesome, to the power of Infinity. It was a 3:30pm showing and was not very crowded - I am used to the grand Vegas productions with permanent installation, but this was a traveling production and it was on such a smaller scale which felt more intimate. I could not stop gasping out loud because I was so afraid they were going to fall. The kids also LOVED it and now have new career aspirations. Manoj works his tail off to build a new life here in America and his kids want to be circus performers. Lovely! 'Tis the American Dream, no? Oh, and Anjali fell asleep in the beginning. She was leaning against me and I noticed she became noticeably heavier. Sure enough, she took a little 20 minute nap. No surprise here since I've posted about her Special Gift of Narcolepsy and have dedicated a Flickr set to it. After all, this is the same girl who falls asleep on the floor at the school and the gym nursery. The girl who also falls asleep during time-outs and will even tuck herself into bed. If my baby girl needs some Snooze Time, ain't no one stopping her, folks. Unfortunately, I couldn't get a snap of the Cirque du Soleil SnoozeFest because I didn't want to test the staunch No Photos edict.

Random Snappage

Who needs a scarecrow when you could have a grass dragon?

I have been driving by this house for years and am always fascinated with where they move it. Manoj had better hope I never come across one of these for purchase. #Swoon

Still, a cobra might be nice.

This is Reason #27891 Why My Neighbors Hate Me. Other reasons??? Flowering weeds? Check. Half-naked kids in the front yard without a parent in sight? Check. Mouse-killing cats? Check. Dog crap? Check. We are The Oliver-George Household, bringing up the neighborhood standards here since 2004.

Absolutely Fabulous Bubbles

We are Front Yard People. That is where the action is - folks walking by with their dogs, saying hello to neighbors, the sidewalk for riding bikes. Our favorite moments are in the Front Yard.

Toadie.

It's a damned Good Thing I took pictures of the toad that Arun captured last week. Because now? This TOAD IS LOST IN MY HOUSE. At least we know what he looks like. Sigh.

White Trashin' It.

I received more than one chuckle in the parking lot as I folded this bad boy up like a taco and shoved it in the trunk. Pride? Whatever! My baby needed a swimming pool and we don't have room for a cement pond.

Fridays of Intestinal Fortitude: Authentic vs. Inauthentic Menus

2011-05-13T20:25:00.003-05:00

Cuidado! Fridays Are Now Under Construction:
For the next month of Fridays, I am departing from the Pink Floyd theme - it's a test (of sorts). I do not necessarily want to be a food blogger, but I do LOVE to talk about food prep, cooking food, eating food and just plain FOOD. So! I am going to use the next month of Fridays to test this out by talking about cooking, sharing some recipes, maybe even talking about how Manoj and I have had to compromise in this all important area of Food. No joke, it has been one of the most difficult aspects of our marriage. Oh, and I dedicated Fridays to the topic so that folks who are not interested in food can just scoot right past these posts.

Updated! The name of the restaurant is Sichuan Gourmet in Billerica, MA

My two favorite Chinese meals are distinctly memorable to me. The first happened in 1993, in Karachi, Pakistan of all places. It was a very fancy Chinese restaurant and the meal was to DIE FOR. I was stunned by the meal, in particular, because it was nothing like Chinese I had ever had in all of my 22 years.

Of course it wasn't! After all, it was Chinese food made for Pakistani folks. It was rich, creamy, spicy and exploding in flavor. More importantly, it was my first realization that Chinese folks adapted their food according to the tastes of the people among whom they were living.

My Second Memorable Chinese Meal was in Boston in 2007. Manoj and I were staying with our Indian friends, Ajay and Shravanthi, who simply RAVED about this place. We walked into the restaurant and immediately, I suspected we were in for a treat. I was the only White Person and Manoj, Ajay and Shravanthi were the only Indians. And the rest of the patrons were Chinese, sitting around huge, circular tables piled with food. Seriously - it was CHINESE PEOPLE EATING CHINESE FOOD.

Who knew?

It was amazing to me to have THIS kind of Chinese food. Super spicy, non-fried, non-crispy, and most decidedly, NOT SWEET. It was savory and sour. Not too heavy.

And no, I was not hungry two hours later.

Okay...okay... this is not some boring recount of two amazing Chinese meals I had, but rather it is the start to an important lesson I learned about a month ago. After the experiences in Boston, instead of thinking "Whoa. How can I get this sort of meal in Kansas City?", I just assumed that we were too Backwater Hillbilly Redneck for Authentic Chinese even though I live in freaking OLATHE which is some sort of a Mecca for Chinese folks in Kansas City.

Oh sure, I had heard awhile back that Bo Lings, a popular restaurant here in Kansas City, has Authentic Chinese Menus, but I have never been a big fan of their food. It was not helped by the fact that last year, we approached them with one of our business ideas and they literally STOLE THE IDEA, even to the extent of copying word for stinking WORD from our website. So, a menu from Bo Steal-ings is not going to hold much water with me. Grudges? I got 'em.

Anyway!! A month ago, I learned that yes, you can actually ask for Authentic Chinese menus at restaurants around here and it has rocked our world. So far, we have tried Lucky Fortune in Overland Park/Leawood (95th and Nall) and Szechuan Dynasty here in Olathe at 119th and Strangline (next to Oklahoma Joe's). We do love Lucky Fortune, but they are a hike, so we will stick mostly with Szechuan Dynasty.

With both restaurants, I had to push back a little when I asked for the Authentic Menus - they both were hesitant to hand them over and I do not blame them. They perhaps assumed I wanted what is considered "Chinese" here in America - sugary and deep-fried stuff. Now that the gal at the Szechuan Dynasty knows us, she is very friendly and laughs when I pick up our order. Last time, she excitedly said to me "I wish more Americans would try the real Chinese."

However, I am not here to recommend specific restaurants in a specific city because this can probably be done anywhere in the United States.

So, am I crazy? Did you know that you can walk into Chinese restaurants and ask for a different menu than what is normally served? Have you done this before? Is it only Chinese restaurants that have this thing going on?

Now, if only Indian restaurants would get on board with this concept.

Let's start a movement, folks.

Terminal Frost

2011-05-11T09:26:00.002-05:00

Pink Floyd, A Momentary Lapse of Reason 1987

The frost? Has been my brain, as of late. Manoj has been traveling to California every other week since the end of March. Have I mentioned that here yet? No? So, he travels during the week for the Job That Pays Actual Money, then comes home on the weekend to work on His New Business Venture, Part Quatre. I guess I could complain about it except for the fact that I am too busy being grateful that he has had steady work. Fortunately, his travel began just as my own working gig ended. Yes, I know I never talked about my experiences "working". I decided to not poke that particular bear - I learned the hard way in the past that it's better to just keep my trap shut on the subjects of working, not working, staying home, running for the hills, etc. I always seemed to get punched in the neck no matter how carefully I crafted my words. Suffice it to say, I was a little relieved when the gig ended, I prefer just "staying" home for now. However, it was a good experience for me to begin thinking about my options down the road when I have two kids in school full-time and I'm staring into the black eyes of Lucy wondering, "What the hell, NOW?"

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Lately, I've zoomed through some good reads - Tina Fey's Bossypants, Kathy Griffin's Official Book Club Selection and Rob Lowe's Stories I Only Tell My Friends. All of them were such fun, yummy, juicy reads. Go read them now! Currently, I am reading George R.R. Martin's A Game of Thrones.

Actually, I have a confession.

I am a wee bit obsessed with the whole Game of Thrones Thing. It started with the HBO series. Then, I bought the book. Now, I have watched every episode twice, have pored through the "extras" on the HBO site, have scoured the Wikipedia entries and am now working on all the "making of " featurettes via On Demand. Reading the book is just icing on the cake. The shocking part to me is that normally, I struggle with reading the fantasy genre. However, something about this series has really grabbed me - the complex history that Martin created for this world, the compelling characters who live within this world. LOVE.

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Recently, Arun attended a birthday party at a little judo academy - the parents were connected to the academy somehow and now Arun is begging to go back to the academy. Well played, Judo AcademyParents. Manoj's new business has to do with colonoscopy prep, which leaves me wondering how I could parlay THAT into a birthday party for Anjali.

Random Snappage

Balancing Act

Thank you little birdie for making my kids giggle. Their belly laughs are sweet music to my ears.

Flowers in the Basement

The recycling bin is my usual go-to spot for most kiddie artwork, but some things are more "keepier" than others. Our basement is of the Dark, Scary Cave variety which makes it perfect for hiding all of the artistic glory that Team Chaos can muster. No worries, kiddos -- I promise your father is not your half-uncle.

Snapping Anjali's Colossal Attitude

Which Only Further Pisses Her Off

Because torturing children is FUN, dammit.

The Show Must Go On

2011-05-06T10:38:00.001-05:00

Pink Floyd, The Wall 1979

Jenny and her family are collecting books and school supplies for Hackleburg, Alabama, which was recently flattened by a tornado. She is calling it Books for Alabama and her son drew a poster for it:

Jenny had been watching the crisis in Alabama closely and not just because it is her husband's home state. She had read this article and felt helpless. But not for long:

By the time I got the kids off to school and returned to the computer to read the article more thoroughly and see the pictures in a larger scale, I had decided we needed to do something. And I wanted my kids to be involved. I can't throw them in the car and drive down there and start handing out water bottles, as much as I want to. But, we can raise some money and do some collections here, which is what I suggested to Drew when he got home from school yesterday afternoon. Because the article was focused mostly on the destruction of the schools there and the students who didn't WANT to go somewhere else, they wanted to go to THEIR school, thank you very much, we decided that thing which we could do is a book drive. But Drew read the article and said, "Mom, we need to do more than just books. They'll need school supplies." That's my boy.

I have already made the ubiquitous donation to Red Cross, but I love that Jenny has provided a way to help that involves actual action. Today, I am making up a flyer and handing it out to my neighbors. If Jenny can put a bin on her porch, so can I.

If you are in the Kansas City area and are interested in donating books or school supplies, please contact Jenny at jennymeade311ATgmailDOTcom. I am going to throw my name in the pot, in case this gets big, I don't want Jenny overwhelmed -- you can also contact me at cagey333ATgmailDOTcom. My schedule is somewhat flexible, so I can do pick-ups.

Thank you, Jenny. You are always an inspiration.